TVgasm - 8th and Ocean: Pretty Vacant

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Allee calls the guys and sends them on a casting call at 2:00 that afternoon. Vinci is confused by this strange thing called time. At first, nobody knows what the shoot is for, but Teddy doesn't care because he sees Heide, Irene's "rising star". Britt shows up, and she is not happy about Heide. To make matters worse, the casting director puts Teddy and Heide together, telling Teddy to make a "mean face" for the camera. If by "mean" she meant "vacant" then Teddy nails it. If by "mean" she meant "Heide" Teddy nails that too.

Mean.

Meaner.

PASSION!!

Irene and Suzy are once again engaging in their favorite behavior of the week: complaining about Tracie's weight. Suzy says Tracie is freaking out because she's not getting any work, to which Irene replies that Tracie knows the ropes and should realize sometimes you're hot, sometimes you're not. I sure could use an Almond Joy right about now. And so could Tracie.

Hey, it's Vinci! At the beach! With Teddy! (Everything's just more exciting when Vinci's around!) Vinci asks Teddy if he likes Brazilians. (The women, not the wax. I think.) Teddy says that Brazilians are the most beautiful girls in the world, but quickly changes the subject to how awkward he felt posing with Heide when he's supposed to be going out with Britt. "Uh huh uh huh uh huh," mumbles Vinci. He can't understand why Teddy is talking about two girls who aren't here, "when there are like one million girl here." Other things Vinci can't understand: Velcro.

Vinci!

Next, Irene meets Tracie on a random bench to talk about her book. And by book, of course, she means weight. Tracie would like to change her book up a bit, and Irene agrees that's a good idea. Tracie's a woman now, not a teenager, and needs to start looking like a woman. So does that mean it's okay for teenagers to be too skinny? Dang-gummit, modeling is confusing!

Later that night, Teddy calls Heide and asks if she wants to come over. While over at the girls' apartment, it's Girl's Night Out, which evidently means girls stay in and eat Papa John's pizza. They start playing some game where they draw questions out of a hat and have to answer them. Tracie is asked if she could be more like anybody in the house, who would it be? She says Britt, because she's a virgin. Does that mean Tracie regrets not being a virgin? Because I'm sure someone in Britt's "Model's for Christ" group could tell her the secret to becoming a Second Virgin^TM. (It's spelled a-n-a-l.) Britt says her vajajay belongs to the Lord, and Tracie shouldn't talk about it like that, but Talesha tells her to chill. "If you don't have it, you won't miss it." Wow, who knew Talesha was married?

Outside, Heide and Teddy are enjoying a dip in the hot tub. And by "enjoying a dip", of course, I mean making out. At one point, Heide tells Teddy he's a hottie, but then remembers he doesn't like that word. Evidently, it has too many syllables. She suggests "gorgeousie" instead, but they both agree that's even worse. Not to mention made up. Moving in for another kiss, Teddy tells Heide he likes her, then asks if she likes him. What a smoothie. I'm surprised he didn't just ask one of the other girls to pass Heide a note.

Try as she might, Heide will never escape the memories of prom night.

Speaking of the other girls, they're up on the balcony spying on the young lovebirds. Britt for one can't believe what she's seeing. We know this because she says "I did not just see that" three times. Look, telling yourself you didn't see something won't make the memory go away, Britt. Don't believe me? Then just try to forget this. Tracie tells Britt that Teddy told her he liked Heide, which makes Britt wonder why Teddy ever asked her out in the first place. Boy, they sure grow 'em dumb in Kansas, don't they. I bet she thinks you can catch gonorrhea from riding a tractor in your bathing suit, too. The other girls say Teddy just doesn't know what he wants, but they do think that Heide is cool. Briana actually talks for once and says that "cool" to Teddy means she lets him touch her boobies. When you put it that way, Heide does sound pretty cool.

In case you forgot the show is taped in Miami, it's time for another beach scene. This time Britt is talking to one of the twins about Teddy. (I think it's Kelly, because her face isn't oozing pus.). Maybekelly says Britt is the kind of girl Teddy would like to have, but the girls that are more like him are the ones he ends up with, ie not married to Jesus.

Finally, Britt visits Teddy in the apartment and calls the whole thing off. She just doesn't think it's a good idea for them to date, because they have different morals and make different daily choices. Teddy tries to act all hurt and plays the sympathy card: "So, I'm not even worth hanging out with? I just want to take you to dinner, you know?" Britt didn't fall off the turnip truck yesterday, though, and tells Teddy it's just not going to work between them. Teddy tries one last time, telling her she doesn't know him enough for that to be a reason, but whatever. Besides, it's only a few more minutes until the roofies kick in.

So, what do you think of this week's ep? Did Britt make the right choice? Is Tracie too skinny? Will Irene's face melt if it gets wet? Vinci!

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Posted by copygodd on March 30, 2006 9:34 PM

Comments

When Brit told Teddy she didn't want to be just another girl, I thought that was pretty intelligent. Of course we'll have to see how long she holds out. And what is up with Brit looking "heavenward" when ever she talks. Is she watching out for the return of her "husband"?
As for Tracie, I think we should read "too skinny" as "too old" 'cause there's no way she's any skinnier than anybody else on this show. And yes, Irene's face will melt if it get's wet. Or if it tries to show any emotions.

Posted by: zevonia | March 30, 2006 9:57 PM(#1 of 25)

Other things Vinci can't understand: Velcro.

HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Not sure why I watch this show, but that sentence above maybe the key to it all.

Posted by: MTV4ME | March 31, 2006 6:50 AM(#2 of 25)

I thought it was hilarious when Vinci said this "when there are like one million girl here," Teddy looked at Vinci like he was a complete moron. That's pretty bad coming from Teddy who's not exactly Einstein himself.

Posted by: boringday | March 31, 2006 6:55 AM(#3 of 25)

I have to agree that Tracie does not appear to be any skinnier than the other models on the show...she is just OLD!

Even though Vinci might not understand Velcro he is still the reason I watch the show. He is vapidly attractive!

Posted by: sportsaholic21 | March 31, 2006 7:17 AM(#4 of 25)

You mean the only other person out there who shares the exact spelling of my name is a model?? On a reality show??

Daggumit.

Posted by: Tracie | March 31, 2006 8:43 AM(#5 of 25)

I agree everything is waay more exciting when Vinci's around.

I looved his logic with Teddy. He's so dumb its almost become endearing.

Posted by: D-Hoffs | March 31, 2006 9:10 AM(#6 of 25)

HILARIOUS! I missed this episode, but the recap is more than enough to make up for it, well done!

If you think Ryan Seacrest and Teri Hatcher kissing is hard to forget, try erasing this one from your memory...
http://www.wwtdd.com/index.php?type=one&i=663

Posted by: Ash | March 31, 2006 9:14 AM(#7 of 25)

so, i have to admit... the real housewives of orange county takes my tuesday night spot now. so, i quit watching 8th & ocean and the real world. and mtv doesn't show it on re-runs. at least when i am trying for it.

(seriously, it's better entertainment)

Posted by: aeb | March 31, 2006 10:05 AM(#8 of 25)

*zevonia;

I too want to know why Britt is always looking up, she does it ALL the time!Even when she was checking out the apartment when she moved in, she was looking up like she was expecting the devil to jump from the ceiling fans or something.

And Vinci is so hot... I don't even care if I can't understand the man half the time he opens his mouth.

*copygodd, this was awesome!

Posted by: stacyrocks | March 31, 2006 10:09 AM(#9 of 25)

aeb,

I record RH of OC so I can watch it on the weekend and I do like it. All these botoxed women, being lonely or eating lunch. Fun times. :)

Posted by: stacyrocks | March 31, 2006 10:14 AM(#10 of 25)

copygodd, thank you
Bloody mary, absolutely perfectly hilarious!
I will never call her the Iron Maiden again, bloody mary it is.....I'm still laughing about that.

Posted by: Pamsey | March 31, 2006 11:50 AM(#11 of 25)

I love seeing "passion" pop up in posts.

It just never gets old.

Posted by: juxtapoeser | March 31, 2006 12:16 PM(#12 of 25)

Can't believe no one has commented on that old hag Irene. Creepy and grotesque.
Her face doesn't move. Is that a new look or is she having a stroke?

Posted by: bdub | March 31, 2006 12:17 PM(#13 of 25)

aeb:

the real housewives of the OC is on thurs nights at 10 too! so you can go back to watching the real world & 8th and ocean!!

unless of course you just dont want to

Posted by: D-Hoffs | March 31, 2006 1:40 PM(#14 of 25)

Count me amongst the "Real Housewives" lovers. They are way more interesting than those "Desperate Housewives."

Posted by: ATCmurph | March 31, 2006 7:27 PM(#15 of 25)

Betcha didn't know Vinci is ALL OVER the International Male catalog... Uh, not that I read it.

Posted by: champagne120 | March 31, 2006 8:56 PM(#16 of 25)

"Boy, they sure grow 'em dumb in Kansas, don't they. I bet she thinks you can catch gonorrhea from riding a tractor in your bathing suit, too."

lmao I just saw that episode of Seinfeld again the other day...classic

I too do not know why I am so facinated with this show...it's either too hear what sexy latin foolishness is going to come out of Vinci's mouth or to hear what "wisdom" Sean is going to grace us with...he thinks he knows everything lol

Posted by: Yanaja | March 31, 2006 9:23 PM(#17 of 25)

Ugh Vinci irritates the hell out of me. Grinning Idiot who gets by solely on his looks. Teddy, dog that he is is far more intersting and better looking. Sean is such an idiot. So obvious he wants to be the smart, sensitive guy ON TV.

I feel sorry for Sabrina too. The bookers can eb such hags. Well except the one who hates Vinci. I like her.

Posted by: Coconutphone | April 2, 2006 12:00 PM(#18 of 25)

look who booked the catch a fire job after all:

http://www.catchafireclothing.com/collections.php

Posted by: babeblue | April 3, 2006 6:21 AM(#19 of 25)

um, is that one of the 8th models on the catchafire site? I didn't recognize any of them.

Saw Brianna on the urbanoutfitters page.

Posted by: hardly@work | April 3, 2006 7:36 AM(#20 of 25)

I have a theory that they can not air all of Vinci's good scenes because they have to censor him for the show.

Posted by: Chris | April 3, 2006 9:39 AM(#21 of 25)

This show totally pissed me off. That Heide girl is not even pretty. She looks ordinary if you ask me. I wonder if she knew Teddy before that day. I think it was mentioned that she didn't live in their area. I'm glad Britt blew him off. I just wish she would have told him the REAL reason. " I saw you kissing that freckled goat in the hot tub you chode."

Posted by: MindyLou | April 3, 2006 11:03 AM(#22 of 25)

chode....lol

Posted by: G | April 4, 2006 12:44 PM(#23 of 25)

Um, tracy isn't old. Half the people there are her age or a year younger. The Talesha girl got the catch a fire ad and she's like her age. I just think none of these girls take care of their skin and are just baskin their youth away in the sun.

Posted by: September_bebe | April 5, 2006 1:02 AM(#24 of 25)

maybe someone already pointed this out, but that commercial with the twins where one has to wear glasses but then gets contacts is kelly and sabrina. it's been out for a long time, pre-acne, but i didnt recognize them untilk yesterday.

Posted by: ldini79 | April 5, 2006 9:45 AM(#25 of 25)

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