Haggi Yedida. What was up with his ass? It looked like he had a spiral ham in his back pocket. Let's get on with the real singing.

I'm with you LQ - let's get on with the singing. A couple of shows with bad auditions is enough. Spiral ham - that's hilarious.

This one was a snoozer. I agree- I am getting tired of the bad auditions.
"Haggi Yedida- wearing a shirt that looks like Betsy Ross barfed all over it". That made me lol...

I could very well be wrong, but I thought Princess said she was blunt, not black? Overall a bad audition show completely, except for Taylor Hicks. I know he won't win AI, but I love his voice.

Good review, bad episode of the show. The "ring" reference was funny.

mspixiechick I believe you are right about the blunt thing. I thought she said black also, but then they compared her to Simon and how he is blunt.

Dan I hadn't really liked your last two post but this one is waaaaaay better then the other two. Keep it like this and I will not think B-side has to come back.

another comically entertaining recap!

seriously, betsy ross would be horrified with that shirt!

i love me some dan recaps.

i've made the claim before, but those who will bash you have no soul. or are republicans.

Better recap than the last two...but still not up to 'Gasm par...

If you need to like a writer who is gay AND uproariously funny, read David Sedaris. He sets the bar so high and thank Christ for that.

As far as I can tell, that Ryan Hart guy just sounds like a screamo singer, not that it makes it better. But he wasn't just making random noise.

Yep, I've had enough! That faux-reggae guy was the last straw. It's just insulting that they just keep putting on clowns like this just to stretch out the ratings. Butgs me that they're trying too hard to come up with another Hung. There is only one Hung!

Did the auditions go on this long in previous seasons.

"Dan Renzi is B-Side's hero"
THAT splains it! I was beginning to wonder.

It seems Dan Renzi does't return the fandom - as evidenced by his lack of response to any of our comments on Dan Renzi's recap pages and the lack of his comments anywhere else. It would be cool to see Dan Renzi post a shout out to B-side after one of his brilliant recaps.

Btw, does anyone else find the constant use of Dan Renzi's full name to reak of "Steven Hillism" (Also known as "Jenna Lewisism" Check any 'Kill Reality' recap - the constant need to refer to oneself using the full name to help attempt to get that name known, part of that thirst for attention a.k.a. Stretchin that 15 minutes.)

Hey...I'm a Republican and I thought this recap was funny...

No one really cares that you're a twin unless you're doing porn

Or if you're in a massage parlor.

Tinkie- My guess is Dan does give shoutouts and comments, but probably under a different moniker. "I couldn't help but wonder"... (said in my best Carrie Bradshaw)... is Dan BigMax?????

OK I am now picturing you as SJP from now on. You must know that I ran back through the comments to re-read anything by BigMax and you could be right. (dun dun DUN)

I think this recap was way better than the previous 2-and way better than the actual show. I think Dan may be starting to hit his stride. This show sucked. When do they get on to the real stuff? It is pretty bad when they show clips of the same people singing more than one bad song. They couldn't have spent that time showing us some of the other 8 people who made it through? They shouldn't go to Vegas next year.

"Singing is like sex: if you have to convince someone you are good at it, that means you're really not good at all."

Excellent point. This made me LOL!
Btw- that Ryan guy could get a gig singing for Drowning Pool (Let The Bodies Hit The Floor). That's who he sounded like.

Chronic, the auditions did go on this long in the previous seasons. Maybe I'm a sadist but this is my favorite part. Where else could you see a guy sing a 'song' from the movie "Trading Places" when the 'song' was even treated like a joke in the movie? And where else would you see Paula and Randy's greed and sell outedness come back to bite them in the butt when a contestant who sings HORRIBLY credits his skills to their DVD? The upcoming group auditions are the most boring for me because I can't tell who anyone is and before you can bond or identify with anyone, they are usually cut. To me, AI gets started again once they have it narrowed down to the final twelve.

And great recap, Dan. I didn't think the other two were that bad and didn't really understand all the hate people piled on. His reviews were no worse than Kat's, and no one ever jumps all over her case.

I try so hard not to be a hater, (it's so uncool), but kudos to TinkerbellAPixie, #11. My thoughts exactly.

#9 Sedaris is incredible, also Augusten Burroughs.

It seems like Paula is saying "no" to the few people that sound good. It is so strange.

"Taylor Hicks looks like he's having a fit when he sings but he sounds pretty cool"

I think this further proves Taylor's point when he said "No one even knows who Joe Cocker is anymore." I read a similar comment about his spasticness on another board. He was imitating Cocker!

Uh, no. Dan is not me. I'm a lawyer in Michigan who never even thought about being on reality TV. Great recap, though. And I enjoyed the shout-out.

Thank you JennyC #21! That's exactly what I was going to say-his impersonation of Joe Cocker was spot-on!
#9 Lizardqueen, my opinion of you went through the roof with your shout-out to the comic genius that is David Sedaris.

I agree with #20. Paula seems to be saying "no" a lot this year, especially when she gets the first vote.

It's almost as if she is afraid that Randy and Simon would make fun of her if she accidentally says "yes" to a mediocre singer.

In short, Paula is trying hard to not look like an idiot... not that she's very good at it.

#18, hm, there was definitely not 3 1/2 weeks of auditions Season 1. This is tricky info to track down. But from what I can tell, seems they had one audition episode Season 1, three for Seasons 2-3, which then ballooned to 7 for Season 4, which I didn't watch at all.

Anyone got any conclusive numbers?

To quote one of youcan'tmakeitup's AI recap of last season--

"Why. do. fat. people. put. themselves. in. harm's. way."

Chronic, I didn't watch season 1 of AI so you're probably correct. As long as I've been watching (embarassingly since season 2) it seems like they always go to 4 or 5 cities during the audition process and it takes about a month. But don't take this to mean I'm arguing the point because I'll concede I might just as easily be wrong.

I think they've always gone to a bunch of cities, but they haven't always dedicated a full hour (or even two, geesh) of programming to each city.

I guess their ratings are still good, even though the audition episodes are all the same (fat person can't sing and Simon cracks weight joke while Paula gets mad, cute girl can't sing but gets through anyway, unattractive guy can sing and they act surprised, people generally act like total idiots to get on tv and cry and whine when they are mocked...)