I Tell Myself I Am Beautiful Every Single Day - 
by J-Unit
So, quite obviously, I am very late on my recappage for the week, and it's quite a shame, because the latest installment of America's Next Top Model was one for the ages. This entire season has been great, but when you get not one, but two different cat fights, with two different participants in each one, you know that there is a lot of drama building in the house. And let's face it, any time you get that many girls living in one place, there is bound to be drama. Put a bunch of women in the same place, and they will start competing. Seriously, they can create a competition while standing in line for Starbucks. They can create rivalries ordering drinks at the bar. They will go to blows over a pair of shoes or a skimpy top. Personally, I can't get enough, and if you are getting all of this when there is an actual competition going on with actual consequences and a life-altering chance at success on the line, there really isn't anything better on television.
Of all of the things I thought would happen after Diane was let go last week, Nik breaking into tears was not one of them. Apparently, they were very close, and I guess we got a hint of it at the end of the last episode when the two of them were doing their exercises. Maybe the thought of somebody learning fitness from Diane sort of broke my train of thought, but I didn't know that Nik would be so affected. She said that she doesn't know if she'll be able to let anybody in and decides to be the quiet girl.
I was not torn up about Diane at all, and so when this part of the episode was dedicated almost exclusively to Lisa I had no complaints. So many people hate Lisa, and what better way to demonstrate her craziness than with a bubble bath montage? I once tried to throw a party with bubbles, but the party people delivered the wrong machine, and needless to say, I failed with my vision and was not able to put on a sudsy orgy for the masses. I guess all I really needed was Lisa. I had the bubbles, I had the alcohol, I just didn't have an alcoholic girl willing to frolic and take her top off, and really, that's what you need to get the critical mass for any sudsy orgy for the masses.
I can understand why these girls can't stand Lisa. She is continually passing out advice, even when it isn't wanted. And let's be honest, her advice doesn't always come across as the most constructive. Personally, I believe she has some good advice, but that delivery: it just makes for a huge problem. Still, I can't help but feel bad for Lisa because the other girls are just pouring it on. Yes, it would make it easier on her if she wasn't such a bitch, and yes it would be easier to defend her if she were meek and submissive. Also complicating this whole thing is that the person who has the biggest beef with Lisa is Coryn, who is the most popular girl in the house, but is also one of the most quiet.
If anything, Lisa should wait until she makes a name for herself in modeling before telling other people that their shit stinks. A good example of somebody who is worthy of giving out modeling advice is Iman, who I hear is dressing up as a hotter version of Grace Jones for Halloween this year. Iman has a beauty book out, and it's all about the largest organ of them all. I could insert a joke here about Coryn's organ being twice the size of her Adam's apple, but the organ we are talking about is the skin. Iman even has a catchy slogan,"It don't mean a thin' if it ain't got that skin." OK, it wasn't that catchy, especially delivered with Iman's thick accent, but she is gorgeous, so we should listen to her anyway.
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