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Never Mind the Bollocks - TVgasm

by J-Unit

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I know there are a lot of Kim fans out there, but you had to realize that as soon as she decided to get into the ring with Bre, the result wasn't going to be in question. I am sure that if the debate was about something like the effects of Christian symbolism on post-Incan familial structures, well, everybody would be bored out of their minds, but Kim with all of that learnin' and readin' that she does would have a chance. If Kim was trying to convince Bre that she wasn't a backstabbing bitch, she wasn't going to get a free pass. Right away Bre said that Kim's character is very ugly (as ugly as that bloated face of hers).

Kim soon saw that she wasn't going to win, and the only way she was going to get out of this alive was to make excuses about why she did it. You know, she didn't do it on purpose, she was only trying to be funny, etc., but Bre and Nik were not letting Kim deny it all happened. Honestly, Kim really didn't have much of an argument. In the segment with Kevin Frazier, the cameras caught Kim imitating Tyra, so nobody was safe from Kim's ridicule, even the woman trying to change her life. Nik told her that she did it all on purpose, and gave an example of when she made fun of Jayla. Up until that time, Jayla had been quiet, but after Kim was confronted with what she said about Jayla, Jayla started crying saying how she liked Kim from the first day and felt so betrayed. With everybody piling onto her, it was long before Kim started crying, but Nicole did come to her defense, saying that everybody talked about everybody, wo why pick on Kim. And if there is anything that you learn as a kid "Everybody's doing it" is not much of an excuse. Well, if everybody told you to jump off a bridge, would you still do it Nicole? No? Well, if they told you that you should at least get rid of that hair on your upper lip, would you do that? Good.

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After those exchanges, it looked like Kim realized people didn't like her behavior. She insisted that she never made fun of Bre, but when Bre said she didn't care, and that it was only a matter of time before it happened, Kim continued with her crying. Bre, who is great at the social manipulation herself, then comforts Kim. You break them down, then build them back up, and Kim will think twice before ever talking abour Bre. As for Bre, she thought that all of Kim's tears were fake, and she was going to keep her enemies closer. I am not sure if Kim's tears were fake, but I would say that they were more for people to have sympathy for her, because I don't see her actually caring that anybody in the house is her friend or not when it's all over. Jayla has said the same thing, but at least she admitted it.

The girls made it to London, and Miss. J was there to greet them, proudly wearing her "Naomi Hit Me" shirt. Now the joke about this is that Naomi was sued by an ex-assistant for a bunch of things ex-assistants sue for, including being slapped and beaten with a Blackberry. Speaking of which, there has to be some strange sexual act called the Blackberry. Hopefully EdHill will read this and let me know what it is. Anyway, Naomi was seen with a shirt on in New York that said "Naomi Hit Me" with "And I loved it" on the back. Miss J's shirt said "and I hit the bitch back" on the rear. If Tyra wasn't planning on reconciling with Naomi this week on her talk show, it would have been much more effective.

When they get to their hotel, the papparazi are waiting for them. They were all photographers that worked for the show, but they simulated the situation very well. I remember my first run in with the paparazzi. I was at LAX to pick up B-side as he returned from one of his jaunts to New York when I saw a bunch of photographers chasing this tall blonde woman. I was too retarded to realize that it was Gwyneth Paltrow at the time, but I did feel bad for her. It's kind of annoying when you are just trying to get your baggage and ten people are following you. I assure you, any sympathy I had was gone by the time she named her kid Apple.


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