Killing time before Chenbot Station (CBS) Premieres Big Brother 6, TONIGHT! - 
by madeyoulaugh
And with raised arms, Julie Chen invokes the wrath of the sky!
With only a few hours to go before the premiere of BB6, TVgasm's coverage of the event has kicked into high gear, causing some of our readers to say, "Well this is good and all, but where's the mind-numbing lame stuff / hysterical recaps that I rely on to get me through the day?"
It is for those people that I have compiled a small list of links and stories to calm the palette of eager Big Brother Six viewers.
Paulie shore is offering $1 to anyone who can watch 30 minutes of his new TBS show, Minding The Store, and not laugh. Putting to rest America's snipe "if I had a dollar for every time Paulie Shore didn't make me laugh..." To find out how you can get some of Paulie Shore's cash, simply by watching Minding The Store, click here.
After the incredible success of Finding Farrah and the fantastic resurgence of a faltering career unseen since that Jesus guy, TV's Batman, Adam West, has signed on to do a reality show which will follow the one-time celebrity as he does everyday former celebrity activities. I can't wait for the weekly trips to Social Security to pick up his check, the food stamp fight with the checkout clerk, and the nightly salting of his bedroom pillow in tears for years gone by. Editor's note: Adam West provides the voice of Mayor West on TV's funniest show, FAMILY GUY, and any mockery of Mr. West is out of the petty jealousy of the author and denotes a small penis.
Our esteemed president has called on Senator Fred Thompson to head a quest for Sandra Day O'Connor's replacement on the Supreme Court. Bush has chosen Senator Thompson "after watching him put bad guy after bad guy away, as a District Attorney on Law & Order. Bush has also appointed Kimmie Gibler and Lisa Turtle as Secretaries of Information.
For some random nude photos of I WANNA BE A HILTON day player Nikki Hilton, click here, here, and of course here!
If anything else comes up throughout the day, I'll toss a link in here. Otherwise, together we can make it through these last few hours of waiting until BB6.
Comments
Big Brother is now a team game. This season, Big Brother will be a battle of teams not an individual game as in previous instalments.
CBS announced today that the 14 contestants are actually seven teams of secret partners from the outside world. Friends, co-workers and significant others will play the Big Brother game as covert duos. The twist is that each team believes they are the only such partnership in the house.
As an added stipulation, if one team can keep their secret and end up being the last two people in the house, the winner will win $1,000,000 with the second place finisher winning $250,000. If a twosome does not make it to the final two, the winner will win $500,000. The pairings will be revealed to TV viewers during the first live broadcast on July 14th.
Posted by: Brian | July 7, 2005 10:25 AM(#1 of 10)
DUH! We all knew that!
Posted by: Lyndsay | July 7, 2005 10:28 AM(#2 of 10)
This year Big Brother will take place in a house, with cameras and contestants!
Posted by: madeyoulaugh | July 7, 2005 10:37 AM(#3 of 10)
"with contestants!"
HA!
Posted by: Jess | July 7, 2005 11:38 AM(#4 of 10)
I am so rigid for this premiere.
Are you guys going to do live feed recaps? There's another site out there that does it (I won't say who yet) but I'd prefer to send the hits your way instead, seeing as you're my favorite site and everything.
Posted by: Papercuts! | July 7, 2005 11:43 AM(#5 of 10)
any bets on how tight the camel toe will be tonight? Will she wear glitter? OR is it just crusted up semen from Les Moonves?
Posted by: Eddiebosox | July 7, 2005 12:25 PM(#6 of 10)
We don't have official live-feed recappers, but we have a couple of moderators for the forums. If any readers want to do some work recapping live feeds, contact me and we can arrange a schedule of some sort.
Posted by: J-Unit | July 7, 2005 12:28 PM(#7 of 10)
Oh my god ! Do you think that the hamsters will notice that:
four live in the Miami Area
two live in and around Dallas
two live in Chicago
two live near each other in California.
Posted by: mk | July 7, 2005 1:09 PM(#8 of 10)
I think b-side has a thing for the Chenbot. This website is now plastered with pics from her as if she's Tiger Beat's #1 go-getter, and this is his bedroom. :)
Posted by: British | July 7, 2005 1:28 PM(#9 of 10)
BRING ON BB6!!!!
I can't wait any longer for the best summer show ever.
Posted by: The Dogg Pound | July 7, 2005 2:19 PM(#10 of 10)