At her doctors appointment they are looking at her X-rays, which amazingly aren’t filled with all sorts of crazy things from cutlery to a bullhorn. I mean, this is Susan after all. He tells her that she needs surgery for an inverted spleen. Even when she gets sick it’s shticky. Why can’t she get an oozing cyst removed? That would have been more interesting. Ron suggests that he do the surgery since he knows her case so well. She agrees but then finds out that this would be his first time doing it. This gets her nervous and when they are having dinner she is anxiously watching him cut his meat rather sloppily. Susan finally tells Ron that she would feel more comfortable with someone else doing the surgery. How comfortable can she be when he can’t even cut his steak right, she says. "That’s not fair you overcooked it, and it's not the freshest meat" he says. Susan responds by saying "Neither am I. I got 35 years on that cow!" Insert easy joke here: I didn’t know cows could live to be over 20 years old?� [rimshot] When Ron hears that he storms out of her house.

The next day Susan is waiting at the hospital to talk to Ron. She was at first going to apologize abut then tells her that she is standing firm and that if he can’t understand that then its over. Ron then tells her that he is sorry and he already sent her some flowers at her house. He says he’s sorry for putting her in that position and cant be her doctor anymore.

Not every story ends so happy this week. Which brings me to Bree and The Applewhites. Bree is bringing Danielle’s backpack upstairs to her room. Little does she know that Danielle is busy getting her frak on with Matthew Applewhite in her room. When Bree finally comes into her room, Matthew hides under the bed. As she is picking up her dirty laundry she’s sees his hand under the bed and asks Danielle if that’s “A black man under your bed?� Wow. Way to get all racial Bree. If I was Danielle I would’ve been all like “Well is that the woman who banged my fathers killer in front of me?� and then Bree would have been all like “No you d’int� and Danielle would have been like “Did I hear a bell? cuz you just got schooled�, and so on and so forth.

Bree grabs Matthew and storms over the the Applewhites and before eh can even get a sentence out Betty slaps Matthew hard across the face and pulls him inside, shocking even Bree. Later Bree goes to see Danielle who is crying in bed. Danielle lashes out at Bree saying she is upset because her life is over and hers is just getting started. Bree defensively tells her that she always wanted Danielle to be happy. "Don't just want it, make it happen" Danielle tells her. It’s a regular Romeo and Juliet. Except for the whole interracial thing. And oh yeah, Romeo wasn't hiding his retarded brother in a castle. Or maybe he was, What do I know. I write for a TV website, I don’t got time for no fancy book learnin.

Trying to be a good mother, Bree goes over to Betty and tries to convince Betty that if they chaperone they can continue to still see each other. Bree is about to answer her when she notices Caleb staring at her from a window in the house. Bree gets home and When Danielle walks in she asks her what’s wrong. Bree tells her everything and then calls the other housewives to tell them to make sure they all come to Poker tonight because she has big news.

Later, Danielle meets with Matthew and asks him if he is hiding the crazy retard guy who broke into Gabrielle’s house in their second story bedroom. Matthew starts freaking out saying that he can't talk about it and that he and him mom have to leave town tonight. Danielle tries to get him to explain but he says he can't. She says that he can trust her, since her family has secrets too. In order to convince him of this she tells him that last year her brother Andrew hit Mrs. Solis with the car and covered it up. Oh Danielle, you stupid, stupid woman.

That night as Bree is getting ready for the poker game Betty shows up saying that they need to talk. She tells him that the man in the window is her son, but she didn’t attack Gabrielle and he didn’t kill the man in the trunk, and that is all she needs to know. When Bree tells her that he needs to be arrested. Betty than says that if she breathes one word of it to anyone she will tell the police that her son was the one who killed Mrs. Solis and covered it up. After she says that the doorbell rings and Bree goes to answer it, shaken. When the girls start to ask her what it was that she asked her over for, Bree just says that she found out that Betty was a good poker player and she invited her over to join them in their game. You would Think that Betty has won this round, but you would be mistaken. As they are playing poker, Bree shoots Betty a stare that tells her that the game has only just begun.

Bitch is going down.

Posted by EdHIll on January 25, 2006 4:34 PM