In the O.R., Dr. Heron cheerily chops away at the infected-leg patient. She asks if anyone cares to "probe the wound," which Alex takes as a cue to become ingratiating as all hell and rhapsodize about the joys of Dr. Heron's "heal with love" method. Cristina rolls her eyes and grabs the instrument from Alex because she loves probing exposed flesh with cold, surgical steel. Especially while wearing assless pleather chaps. Anyway, the patient's muscle tissue is really messed up—it turns out she has the flesh-eating bacteria. Damn, just last week I bet B-Side two barium enemas and a colostomy bag that they wouldn't pull out flesh-eating bacteria til season three.

It turns out that the old woman patient who Meredith resuscitated was a terminal hospice case who had a "do not resuscitate" order. Three old harpies, who are apparently the old woman's friends but more like Hades' version of the Golden Girls, show up and complain that Meredith prevented the old lady from rejoining her recently deceased husband in the afterlife.

"Just pull the plug honey, I have a pie in the oven"

Cristina and Dr. Effervescence O'Mirthfulness inform flesh-eating girl's husband that they may have to amputate his wife's leg. In her pagan bloodthirst, Cristina insists that they have to amputate RIGHT THAT SECOND, but Dr. Heron says they might be able to save the leg by trying to excise all the infected tissue. Cristina argues that anything less than full amputation will spread the infection and kill the patient. Thanks for the encouragement, REICHSMARSCHALL YANG. Nonetheless, the patient's husband knows she'd want to try to save the leg, so they opt for that approach.

The prognosis for Izzie's patient's tumor-afflicted baby is good, so she might be able to go home by the end of the week. Izzie talks to the young mother-to-be for a bit and realizes that she has made almost no plans or preparations for the new baby. Though she's sometimes been judgmental in the past, Izzie is very understanding and empathizes with the girl. Yep, her Jesusil® 200mg must be kicking in.

In the O.R., it's clear that Cristina has no respect for Dr. Heron and thinks that she's in over her head with this flesh-eating bacteria. She reminds Dr. Heron once again that if the bacteria gets into the patient's bloodstream, she'll die. Dr. Heron retorts that Cristina has no compassion. Cristina says she's just trying to save the patient from death; Dr. Heron says she wishes Cristina were more like Alex, which—given Alex's history of failing board exams and, you know, KILLING PATIENTS—is too much for Cristina to handle. She promptly excuses herself from O.R. and runs to tell Dr. Burke that Dr. Heron might be killing the patient.

Dr. Burke hurries into the O.R. and questions Dr. Heron about her methods and her experience with flesh-eating bacteria. She says that aside from that one drunken night in '79 with Grace Jones and all those midgets, she's basically in new territory here. Dr. Heron shows surprising perception and cojones, giving Dr. Burke some lip before proceeding to eviscerate Cristina without even raising her voice. She decries Cristina's lack of compassion and says she's more eager to whip out the bone saw and amputate than actually try to save the leg in the first place. Damn, I miss Dr. Bailey, but woman could be almost as good.

The three harpy-friends of Meredith's resuscitated old woman are pretty eager to pull her plug, but the patient's daughter—a lesbian I might add—holds power of attorney. So they need her to show up and provide an original signature. Izzie, meanwhile, watches wistfully as her patient reads her unborn baby some lines from her bedside copy of As You Like It. Just don't read Measure for Measure next, cause that play's all about syphilis and we already have plenty of that here.

At the local bar, the nurses toast George for his help during the strike, while the interns all complain about things. Cristina whines about her embarrassing incident in the O.R. and insists that she's a compassionate person; Meredith bemoans the fact that she may have to kill her old-woman patient tomorrow. Izzie looks upset but doesn't say anything and abruptly heads out. Alex taunts Cristina and calls George "Nurse O'Malley." One of the big Amazon nurses intentionally spills her drink in Cristina's lap, and they nearly get in a nasty catfight that I am DYING TO SEE until the big burly cuddly gay bartender steps in and separates them. Meredith takes Cristina out.

"HOW DARE YOU ask me to handle money on the Sabbath!"

Meanwhile, Izzie goes back to the hospital to talk to her patient, the pregnant young girl. Izzie says she grew up in the same town as the girl, in a trailer park. She pauses for a moment and asks whether the patient can keep a secret. She then pulls a small photo out of her purse and we learn that OH. MY. GOD. GURL GOT HERSELF A TRAILER PARK LOVE CHILD. Yep, so apparently Izzie's birth canal isn't exactly an untrodden path. This isn't necessarily a SURPRISE surprise, because we're all well aware by now of Izzie's less than privileged upbringing, but I was still pretty shocked. They should rename this place Seattle Grace Center for Out-of-Wedlock Procreation.

Izzie says she had the baby when she was 16, which means the girl is 11 now. Izzie knows only that her new parents named her Hannah. She gets emotional and tells the girl that, though the folks in the trailer park don't talk about it much, she does have the option of giving the baby up for adoption if she's not ready to be a mother. The girl says she loves the baby, but Izzie says that there's no way she'll be able to take care of her when she's working twelve-hour shifts at a diner. This scene really is great.

Izzie takes a trip to Afterschoolspecialland

Posted by m_ruv on February 1, 2006 10:45 AM