Out by the board, Izzie waits nervously to hear some results, especially worried because a couple nurses mention that patients are dying left and right. In front of Izzie, Alex bets a nurse $20 that it's Denny who bites it. Damn, when they lay on the Alex-as-asshole stuff they really lay it on thick. We learn that the stalker girl died. Call me callous, but THANK GOD. Then Webber walks out of the O.R. with a horrified look on his face that makes us think Mary Kay Place is dead body #6. Actually, Webber announces she made it through—we learn that the OCD patient died instead. NICE.

Izzie finds out that Christmukkah is not, in fact, a real holiday

In Burke's O.R., things go poorly, as Denny's heart once again proves weak of constitution. Afterward, we see Izzie crying against a wall... because Denny is ALIVE!!! Ooh they're being tricky this week. Denny asks why she's crying. She responds she just cannot fall for a patient. Asshole coworkers, sure, but a patient just seems like a bad idea. Denny laughs and says well good luck with all that, which prompts Izzie to plant a big wet sloppy one on Denny, breathing tube and all.

Finally, a man who'll indulge her fetish for "gear"

George walks into the locker room and once again makes a show of avoiding Meredith. Bad-mood Alex can't take this anymore and says George is a sad, whiny excuse for a man. Fine, he got laid and it went badly—a real man would move on and not mope around so much. Alex can't stand it and says if it wouldn't get him thrown out of the program he'd smash George's head right into the locker. I hope you've been lifting weights Alex because that head is HUGE.

This incident apparently inspires George to grow some cojones at long last. He approaches Dr. Torres to apologize for not calling, but she gives him a taste of his own medicine and flat-out ignores him. Undeterred, he whips out his cellphone and calls her right then, from just a few feet away. When she answers, George finally comes out with the line we've all been waiting to hear: "Callie. Congratulations. You're still in the running towards becoming America's Next Top Model." Actually, he says hi, this is George, he shoulda called sooner, sorry, cause he loves to watch her set bones and he spends only a few short minutes a day in the women's restroom and he really likes her and he'd love to have her set his own bone sometime, would she be into that? From the look on Dr. Torres's face, that's a yes.

¿Diiiiiiiga?

As everyone leaves the hospital, Burke gives his lucky surgical cap back to Cristina. She-Shepherd keeps handing out the goddamn cocoa-juju and tells Meredith she's sorry to hear about her patient. Damn she is desperate for goodwill. Meredith takes a sip but throws it out again as soon as She-Shepherd is gone.

There have been a lot of good episodies recently, but I think I liked this one the best. The confrontation between Izzie and Cristina was a riot, and it was a nice episode for Webber also. And all the annoying patients died! What more can you ask for. The thing I don't get—and this'll probably prompt all manner of hate mail—is how Izzie got so into Denny. I mean LADY he's charming and all but he just lies there in the bed. It just seems a little unrealistic to me. Also, I didn't like how George was acting like a psycho toddler all episode and then at the very end he's suddenly all sympathetic and endearing. Nonetheless, I thought this was a great hour of television. Each of the doctors does a little good-luck ritual before surgery. She-Shepherd pins her wedding ring to her lapel; Burke cracks his neck; He-Shepherd repeats his little saying that it's a "beautiful day to save lives"; Bailey does a little yoga pose that I am naming "Flavasana." But today these rituals apparently are as effective as, say, the "rhythm method" of birth control, because not two minutes into the show and four patients are dead.

The interns discuss this disaster in the locker room. Izzie says the morgue guy told her that deaths come in threes or sevens, so they should expect an additional three before the day is out. Cristina calls horseshit on that. George, for his part, continues to make a show of avoiding Meredith, which frankly is getting really old. Before long, Bailey calls them all to the E.R. to await new patients.

In the hall, She-Shepherd is dispensing good luck—in the form of hot chocolate, rather than the more "adult" services one might have expected from the resident ADULTERESS—to the doctors and interns. She refers to these these good luck tokens via the West African term "juju," injecting a much-needed note of ethnic and racial diversity to a show that was, until now, desperately lacking in that regard. She-Shepherd even gives one to Meredith, as a token of goodwill and shared sexual experiences. He-Shepherd notes his wife's generosity and says he certainly isn't planning on being that generous to Mark Sloan.

Meredith, the ungrateful little hussy, takes one sip of the cocoa-juju and throws it out. Burke, meanwhile, is freaking out because the hospital laundry has lost his good-luck African-flava-pattern surgical caps. Webber warns him that, superstition or not, there's no way Burke is gonna delay surgeries just cause his Nelson Mandela collection is still in the wash.

As the interns wait around for patients, Cristina notes that it's "dead quiet," which prompts an immediate dubious-black-woman threat response from Dr. Bailey. Izzie says that declaring a hospital "quiet" is as bad as uttering the cursèd name "Macbeth" in a theater—but in a nod to her Twinkies-and-NASCAR upbringing she pronounces it "theAYter." She would make a great Daisy Mae Scraggs whenever they cast the inevitable Li'l Abner remake.

Posted by m_ruv on March 23, 2006 11:30 AM