Recap: House: Arrested Development - 
by copygodd
Of course the tests come back negative. House, meanwhile, asks if Foreman has a problem with interracial dating. "Haven't any of your shorties ever been whities?" Foreman says he doesn't understand House's ghetto slang, and asks House how many black women he's dated. "I don't care about color," House says, "as long as they can help me breed a superior race." Foreman admits most of his girlfriends have been black, but that's only because he has more in common with them. Much like House must only date emotionally stunted bigots. Well played, Foreman. Well played.
"Word."
Next, House has to explain his actions with DMo to Cuddy. He still thinks Cuddy is pregnant, and needles her about the size of her rapidly expanding first-trimester ass. Speaking of, Cuddy tells House he can berate patients all he wants, "but shoving objects into their rectums is assault." In the end, she orders House to apologize to DMo. (Get it? In the end?)
Meanwhile, the wife wakes up and sees her husband's father in their room, warning her to stay away from his son. She asks how he found them, but he ignores her, and instead warns his son to stay away from that girl, before breaking his arm. Looks like Dad's a bit of a bigot himself. But whereas Jeremy fractured someone's skull for attacking his wife, when it's time for her to return the favor, all she does is sit there and scream. Women. Fortunately, her screams alert Foreman, who runs into the room. Unfortunately, Tracie was just hallucinating. Even more unfortunatelyier, she slips into a coma.
"Uhm, lil help?"
Foreman is sitting with Jeremy talking about his wife, who's undergoing an MRI. The tests show her coma's getting worse. Meanwhile, Jeremy's pains are getting stronger. And Leon's getting larger.
Jeremy explains his wife's hallucination: His dad was a drunk, pill-popping racist (Aren't they all?). When he caught Jeremy sneaking into Tracie's house, he broke Jeremy's arm and threatened Tracie. A few years later, they ran off together. And a couple years after that, Jeremy's dad killed himself. Yay guilty suicide!
Later, the Housemates are going through a bunch more possible diseases. When the Outhouses don't agree with House's newest theory, he takes his ball and goes home. By which I mean he takes the x-rays to ask Wilson.
Wilson doesn't buy House's theory either, but that isn't the only reason House is there. Seems he bribed the janitor to steal the new nurse's personnel file and he wants Wilson to look it over. Wilson still denies dating her, and calls House a miserable jerk who can't stand to be alone, and whose real fear is Wilson having a good relationship so they can't hang out any longer. House admits that keeps him up at night, along with the Loch Ness Monster, global warming, evolution and other fictional concepts.
Even though Wilson didn't agree with him, House tells the others he did and orders them to start the treatment. He also orders them to do a brain biopsy. Cameron says they can't, because the husband has to give consent and he has an obvious conflict of interest, in that he has the same disease. "It's not his brain we're cutting open, but he gets all the benefit. He'd do it just to save himself." When did Cameron become such a hopeless romantic?
Cuddy agrees with Cameron, because chicks always stick together. She tells House he can't do it without a separate guardian's decision, because it would open the hospital up to a potential lawsuit. But don't all of House's cases do that? Eventually, she agrees to let Wilson talk to Jeremy about doing the tests, but only if House apologizes to DMo for leaving a thermometer in his pooper.
Jeremy listens to Wilson's explanation of the test, but says he won't let them cut Tracie's brain, because she's too brilliant. Instead, he tells Wilson to cut open his brain instead. If only it were that easy. Unfortunately, the disease hasn't progressed far enough in Jeremy, so his brain isn't infected yet. Fine. Then Jeremy tells Wilson to stop treating him so his symptoms will get worse faster. House is right: Jeremy is a dumbass.
In order to get Jeremy to change his mind, House wants to take him off his morphine, because "drugs cloud a person's judgment." Hello Pot? Kettle on line one. When the Housemates refuse to turn off Jeremy's morphine, House threatens to put him on an opiate-blocker. Foreman says that's unethical, even for House, and makes House give him the drugs. Too bad House pulled the old switcharoo and gave Foreman the wrong drugs. Because by the time he figures it out, House has already injected Jeremy and starts with the verbal abuse, calling Jeremy a moron for not letting him cut open his wife's brain: "Dude, she's in a coma. Who you trying to impress?" Good point.
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