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Downstairs, the Outhouses are trying to give George his MRI before the table breaks. So far, everything is looking normal. They try to think of other tests to run, but everything they suggest, Chase says they can't do on someone George's size. Man, he really does hate fat people. Midway through the test, though, George wakes up and totally freaks out. Foreman and Cameron try to pull him out of the machine, but the table ends up collapsing. Who didn't see that coming?

House and the 'Mates are back discussing why George came out of his coma. Not to mention why he was in a coma in the first place. And Chase still keeps complaining about not wanting to treat a fat guy. Since George is no longer in a coma, he must be better. Cuddy comes in and starts yelling at House about the broken MRI table. In the middle of her tirade, Cameron covers for House, saying the test was her idea. Man, she really has a thing for this fat guy. When Cuddy backs off because Cameron says it was her idea, House says it looks like Cameron is going to be having a lot more ideas in the future: "Who knew that being bloated and bitchy could be so handy?" Besides Rosie.

House gets back to the hospital and the Housemates start in on a bunch of ideas of what could be wrong with the fat guy. Except for Chase, who still doesn't want to treat him. House orders Foreman to check his belly, Cameron to check his nuts and Chase to continue sitting on his ass. And that's the last we see of Chase this episode.

Now that the patient is awake, Foreman and Cameron try to get a history from him. He says there's nothing wrong with his hormones: as long as he's got the cash, they got the moans. (Rimshot!) He says since he's out of the coma, he must be fit to go home. Fit being a relative term of course. Next he starts rattling off a bunch of statistics that make me never want to go to a hospital again. Bottom line? He'll come back in for the tests, but he wants to go home. Now.

House and Wilson are talking about why Cameron has such a case of fat scratch fever. Was she fat? Was someone in her family fat? Is she overcompensating for her beauty by being super nice to ugly people? Wilson says the patient reminds Cameron of House, which really doesn't explain a thing. Then he tells House to call the lawyer. The Outhouses show up and tell House that in addition to George's tests all coming back negative, he's insisting he wants to leave. So now it's up to House to turn on his considerable bedside manner to convince him otherwise. This can't go well.

And it doesn't. House tries to berate George into staying: either he's crazy or he already knows what he has. George says if he knew what was wrong, he'd tell House. He's not an imbecile, and he's not miserable, he's just overweight. Yeah, that explains everything.

In the middle of their argument, House gets a phone call and rushes home. Seems DMo got a search warrant to go through House's house and found over 600 Vicodins. 600? Damb. I know I drink a lot of beer, but aside from Halloween, Christmas, New Year's, Easter, July 4th and Arbor Day, you'd be hard-pressed to find 600 beers in my house at any one time.

Later, back at the hospital, Cameron is trying to talk House into keeping George. But House wants to send him home. She thinks it's because he's so wrapped up in his own problems that he doesn't care about George. House? Self-absorbed? Say it isn't so...

House eventually finds Wilson and starts yelling at him for talking to DMo. Seems House thinks it's Wilson's fault that his apartment was searched. He must have said something to the cops. After all, House certainly didn't talk to the cops. Yeah, but Wilson isn't the one who left a thermometer in a cop's ass either. Jeez you two, just get a room.

While those two are busy fighting, Cameron is trying hard to dissuade George from leaving. Unfortunately, he can't smell what the Cam is cooking, so she agrees to let him go. On the way out, George keeps saying he wants to walk on his own, but Cameron keeps trying to talk him into staying in the chair. Undeterred, he gets up and tries to walk out. A few steps later, though, and Georgie isn't feeling too well and grabs Cameron before falling backward through a plate-glass window. Puss. He must've had his ankle replaced with a vagina just like Dr. Jeff from The Biggest Loser last season.

Later, a battered Cameron tells House and Foreman not to try and diagnose why George got dizzy and passed out. Turns out she drugged him. For some reason, Cameron really wants George to stay in the hospital. Enough so that she's even pulling some House-worthy Chenanigans.

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Posted by copygodd on November 9, 2006 9:57 AM