In the winter, a little show called American Idol will be returning to the schedule at 8:00 pm, making karaoke fans across the country go into seizures (I’m not making fun – I’m the first one to make sure I don’t swallow my own tongue). It will be interesting to see how, if at all, this year’s show will affect next season's performances. The early ousting of gay-hating Mandisa, the upset that was Chris Daughtry (tear), the inclusion of Bucky Convington on national television. I’m personally not a huge fan of either Katharine McPhee (Kanye West looks downright modest compared to her) or Taylor Hicks (S.I.P. – Elliot Yamin), so I wonder if people may possibly become even slightly disenchanted with the show after this season? I mean, come on, Taylor Hicks as the American Idol? At the very least, Simon is going to be sipping Paula’s cup o’fun next season. House stays put at 9:00 pm.

Wednesday:

Justice starring Victor Garber and his enormous ears.

Bones will lead off the evening in the fall, hopefully riding high off a pretty interesting season finale (Bones’ father is… ALIVE!?!?!). I’m not a big fan of procedurals, but this one is a little quirky, and the introduction of a long term story arc has piqued my interest. Not to mention that I am contractually obligated to watch anything by a former member of the Buffy/Angel-verse. At 9:00 pm, the new show, Justice, about a team of high(yawn)priced lawyers shows only slight promise because of Victor Garber (Daddy Bristow on Alias – tear) and Kerr Smith – who reminds me of a younger, saner, more Top Gun-Centric Tom Cruise (wait… is that a compliment?). If Kerr Smith and Tom Cruise’s name together means something to you, that’s because he was Jack on Dawson’s Creek, which starred Katie Holmes, who is currently having sex with Tom Cruise. AHH Six Degrees of Tom Cruise’s penis! This show will sink or swim based on quality (Jerry Bruckheimer produced it – which means pretty to look at but probably emotionally vacuous) and cast chemistry.

Again all bets are off this Winter, with the incoming American Idol Results show (snoooore – anyone else miss Brain Dunkleman? Seriously.) at 9:00 pm. Justice will be moved to 8:00 pm (Bones is off to Fridays at 8:00 pm). But the real news here is the return of The Loop. The show was all but forgotten after lackluster ratings this spring, but I loooooved it! It’s now getting the plum post-American Idol time slot at 9:30 in the hopes of being the first successful live action sitcom that Fox has launched since That 70’s Show premiered in 1998. The show is being tweaked a little to focus more on the workplace antics that Sam (Brett Harrison, memorable for his performance as Danny, the guy with the BIG humor in season 2 of The O.C.), a fresh out of college Airline executive who got hired based solely on his thesis paper, gets into at work. The workplace cast is way better than the at home cast that bogged down the show this season, with Mimi Rogers and Philip Baker Hall as Sam’s bosses. Please watch.

Thursday:

Speaking of Fox sitcoms, the network is premiering two in the no-longer-as-competitive-as-it-used-to-be 8:00 – 9:00 pm timeslot. First up is Til Death, starring Eddie Kaye Thomas (FINCH) and Kat Foster as newlyweds who think marriage is fun until they move next door to long married soul crushers Brad Garrett and Joely Fischer. Sounds a little like Married… with Children, and that’s not a bad thing. Executed properly, I think this could be pretty good. At the upfronts last week, it seems Brad Garrett took to the stage and made an ass out of himself, making fun of everyone from Fox itself to CBS to poor drugged out Paula Abdul who was in the audience. It seemed to backlash as he was met with crickets. Insert Everyone Loves Raymond joke here. At 8:30 pm, Happy Hour premieres about a bunch of twentysomethings who are trying to balance work and play. It stars a bunch of nobodies and although I look forward to a show of this kind to be done well, early word is that Happy Hour is not that show. At 9:00 pm The O.C. returns, and while the season finale (please see the J-Unit and B-side clipgasm posted last week to further understand – hysterical), and the full-time return of creator Josh Schwartz left me with some hope, this is really the last shot this show has at winning me back. In the meantime, it will (continue) to struggle in the ratings up against CSI, Supernatural, and the newly replanted Grey’s Anatomy (which I’m pretty sure has many of the same viewers as The O.C.). The schedule remains the same in the winter.

Friday:

Usually, I have very little interest in Friday Night programming, which is a shame because sometimes over the weekend it’s noice to have a fresh episode of something to watch on my DVR. In the fall, Fox will continue its attempts to completely ruin the family unit across the country with the reality liferuiners shows Nanny 911 and Trading Spouses: Meet Your New Mommy.

In the winter, Bones will get transplanted to Fridays at 8:00, and I think it will do pretty well there. It won’t be helped, however, by the midseason premier of The Wedding Album, starring the Carver himself, Bruno Campos, as a sought after wedding photographer who, get this, can’t settle down himself! Only noteworthy for co-starring my favorite ex-America’s Next Top Model, Eva Pigford.

Saturday:

For literally the 21084393880398 season, an hour of Cops will be followed at 9:00 pm by America’s Most Wanted.

Posted by on May 25, 2006 6:14 PM