Upfrontsgasm: NBC - 
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With a look at NBC’s schedule, my coverage of the 2006-2007 upfronts (the annual presentation of network’s new schedules to media outlets and advertisers) comes to a close.
NBC is in the worst shape of the 5 major networks. It’s coming off yet another disastrous year and they’ve been facing this downward trend ever since the loss of The Jennifer Aniston Show, otherwise known as Friends. After foolishly betting on the charm of Joey to carry the Must See TV torch, NBC settled on the Donald’s hairpiece to keep the network relevant on Thursdays with The Apprentice. Now after that show and the Donald himself have begun to show their age, NBC is betting on a series of new shows and young hits to keep their dreams of world television domination alive in 2006-2007. That’s not to say that last year was a total waste: the game show, Deal or No Deal, hosted by Bobby’s World creator/the world’s most famous OCD patient Howie Mandel, was a surprise hit last season, as was the new comedy My Name is Earl.
NBC also has some of the most talked about shows of the new season, including not one but two about the backstage madness going on at an SNL-style show. One, 30 Rock a half-hour comedy from the mind of Tina Fey, the other an hour-long drama Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, from West Wing creator Aaron Sorkin. This season, NBC said goodbye to two of the network's longest running, most decorated shows, Will & Grace (Most. Depressing Series Finale. Ever.) and The West Wing. Cancelled are the aforementioned Joey (burning off its last few episodes sometime this summer), the Law & Order-spin-off Conviction (Does this mean Stephanie March will head back to SVU? Pretty Please?), E-Ring and reality shows Fear Factor and The Apprentice: Martha Stewart Concentration Camp. NBC was actually the first of the networks to reveal its schedule but held a press conference last week to reveal major updates to its new schedule. The reason? Grey’s Anatomy’s move to Thursdays at 9PM where it was going to compete against/demolish Studio 60, which was in position to reignite Must See TV Thursday. You see, Meredith Grey doesn’t only destroy lives in Seattle Grace; hers is the most deadly plague since the spreading of the McPheever. Also it should be noted that Scrubs HAS been renewed for a full season, but its premiere date has not yet been confirmed. At first it was speculated that it would return midseason, but with the recent shakeups to the schedule, it could return earlier. To find out what other surprises NBC has in store for us, join me after the jump!
Sunday
JOHN MADDEN TRYING TO CALCULATE EXACTLY HOW MUCH MONEY HE HAS. AND HOW MUCH IT WOULD COST TO BUY CO-SPORTSCASTER AL MICHAEL'S IMMORTAL SOUL.
In one of the biggest coups for NBC, this season the NFL returns to the Peacock on Sunday nights for the first time in years. This basically guarantees the faltering network a ratings boost for the first half of the season. AT 7 PM, NBC is boasting the first ever full hour NFL pre-game program, anchored by Al Michaels and John Madden, who despite popular belief, isn’t just a guy whose name is on a videogame. At 8 PM the football game coverage will begin.
After the football season ends, NBC will have a little post-partem depression but hopes to rebound quickly with the return of the Simon Cowell produced reality competition, America’s Got Talent. The show actually premieres over the summer; so I suppose if it’s not a ratings winner, NBC will be looking for another show to fill this slot. America’s Got Talent is kind of a Star Search/American Idol hybrid, except instead of singers singing their hearts out, they’ll be contortionists, contorting their hearts out and fire-eaters fire eating their hearts out. Why not just call it America’s Next Carnival Sideshow? The big shock here is that the host of America’s Got Talent will be… REGIS PHILBIN! Yes, the Reege! This may not seem like a huge controversy, but as you may have noted, America’s Got Talent is not being aired on ABC where the Reege has set up shop for years and years. How will this effect his morning show? How about those Who Wants to Be a Millionaire specials? Most importantly, what of Kelly Ripa!?!? Also premiering in January will be Raines, starring Jeff Goldblum as a detective who gets confessions out of criminals by stammering and rubbing his forehead until they get so annoyed by his tics and mannerisms they crack.
Monday
JUST LET ME GET THIS OUT OF THE WAY: COULD I BE ANY MORE EXCITED ABOUT THIS SHOW?
At 8PM, Deal or No Deal is going to lead off the evening, and I’ll probably start watching because I think Howie Mandell is about one handshake away from a full-on nervous breakdown. At 9PM is the premiere of the new show Heroes, which depending on who you listen to is the best new show of the year or the first potential bomb of the season. Personally, this is one of the new shows that I am most looking forward to. The show centers on a group of strangers who suddenly discover they have superpowers. Supposedly, this is played more for drama than a Smallville-like actioner, which is fine with me. I like to think that it’s not the big comic book nerd in me that’s excited about Heroes but rather the enlightened television connoisseur.
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