Oh, Christ. I had hoped we'd seen the last of the vet and the Bag, but we have not. Instead, the vet has been stripped to his shorts and tied up on an exam table. So I assume he cooperated in this? Because if not, that magical hand is really healing rapidly. The vet tells T-Bag that his acts in this lifetime are going to determine his fate in the next. T-Bag says that he is "more a here-and-now type." However, he nonetheless counters with an alternate spiritual belief: the Native American idea that when one warrior kills another, he absorbs the spirit of his victim. Under this theory, the vet is about to become part of T-Bag. This is just about as comforting as you'd expect it to be. T-Bag proceeds to put the vet down by lethal injection. I'm sorry, but I just cannot get over the way that this bleeding one-handed freak has managed to completely subdue this able-bodied man without any realistic threat of force. GAH.

Did I do a good enough job of tying myself up for you, Mr. Bag?

Michael goes into a hardware store to get some supplies. Link waits outside on the sidewalk, which is not the best plan, because some woman recognizes him and hails a passing cop. Um, dude, it probably would have been better to go in the store with Mikey or else wait in the car. I've heard that sidewalks are not the greatest of hiding places. Link realizes he's been made and goes into the store to get Michael, just as the cop walks in behind him.

After the commercial, the store owner leads the cop over to where Michael and Link were standing, but of course they've zipped out the back door or something. Unfortunately for them, the cops have found their car, and they are forced to abandon it. This doesn't sit well with Mr. Gotta Plan Everything, but the more devil-may-care Link doesn't seem too fazed.

Elsewhere, Tweener is posing as a college student on campus. He's wearing a St. Louis Tech sweatshirt - this was the school of some guy who was standing behind him in line at the train station. Wait, did he steal that guy's clothes or something? I'm so confused. Tweener studies a ride board and snags the number of a girl named "Debra Jean Belle" who is driving to Utah. I love how everyone on this show just calls it "Utah," as if there were only one place in the state that a person could go. It might make sense in the context of talking about going to get Westmoreland's money (assuming that Michael does know the actual location), but if you are advertising on a ride board, don't you need to say a little more about where you are going than just the name of the state? I mean, if you just say, "Hey, does anybody need a ride to Utah," then all you're going to get is the sketchy drifters who don't really care where they end up. Oh, wait. Nice job, Debra Jean Belle. Tweener steals the whole flyer so that no one else can take her up on her generous offer.

Back at the meeting of the Department of Corrections, Pope gets three months' probation and Bellick gets canned. It seems a little odd that they didn't even try to find out whether Pope knew what Bellick was up to. I mean, I know he didn't, but shouldn't the buck stop at the top? Three months seems a bit light, considering everything that's gone down on Pope's watch. I can't believe the taxpayers are going to be too psyched to have him running Fox River again after he spends a few minutes in the timeout chair.

Bellick is really freaked out, because he's worked for Fox River since he was eighteen. Well, you should have thought of that before you turned all corrupt, mister. However, it does seem a little off that he doesn't get an appeal or anything. Isn't this a government job? Then Pope proves himself to be an even bigger idiot than we already knew, by saying that if Bellick is fired, then he quits, because he won't abandon one of his own men. DUDE. You just found out that this guy was taking cash bribes in exchange for allowing a mafia boss to run the entire work program at the prison. Now you're falling on your sword for him? This is even dumber than leaving a convicted felon alone in your office so he can build a popsicle-stick Taj Mahal for your wife. No, on second thought, it might be a tiny bit less dumb than that. But it's close.

Outside the courthouse, Link tells Michael that if Michael winds up back in Fox River, Link isn't coming to bust him out. I guess that was supposed to be a joke, but it seems pretty freaking ungrateful nonetheless. Then Link tries to give Michael an out from this new harebrained "bust out L.J." plan, but Michael doesn't take it. They go up the courthouse fire escape or something.

Gotta love the security at this courthuse. And yes, that extra Wentworth and see-thru Link were really in the shot. I smell a Brett Ratner.

There is a creepy scene of T-Bag washing up in the sink next to the dead vet. I start to wonder if the vet is actually still alive. I mean, it's not like T-Bag would know what exact dosage of cat euthanasia to shoot into this guy. Of course, the vet has been so cooperative in his own demise, he probably directed T-Bag to a calculator in his desk drawer, told him his exact weight in grams, and explained to him how to do the math to figure out the dose.

Posted by Amanda on August 30, 2006 2:11 PM