How Much is That Model in the Window? - 
by EdHIll
With sg-dubs recent sabbatical in order to finish his 4 volume novel on the history of the Russian monarchy, the task of taking over Project Runway has fallen to me, EdHill. Since this is one of my favorite shows I was eager to accept the challenge. I will, as Tim Gunn says so eloquently, "Make it work�. So hopefully the recaps can remain funny and interesting and no one will notice that we switched Darren’s midstream. And I’m sure sg-dub will provide me with a few funny jokes here and there, like Carson did for Letterman.
Since last weeks recap was cut short, to refresh you're memory the gang was given the task of DEE-signing a dress for a red hot socialite. The woman was none other than Nicky Hilton herself. You'll remember her as the cuter sister of the other Hilton who likes to shoot videos of her polishing some dudes knob. When it came down to the judging Guadalupe lost because while her outfit was perfect for Tina Turner in Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome (Masterblaster rules Bartertown!), it didn’t work so well in rich pre-apocalyptic 2006 New York City. I personally preferred Nick’s dress with the low slung back but since Santino charmed Nicky so much at the cocktail party, Nicky went with him. If only Santino could work the soap as hard as he worked Nicky, I wouldn’t have to spend 5 minutes every week cleaning off the greasy film he leaves on my TV screen. And special thanks to commenter ceenee who said she thought Santino looks like he smells like friend onions. That still makes me laugh every time I see him onscreen.
The episode this week starts with the ritual Santino ego trip. Since he was picked as the winner he is walking around the loft acting as if his shit don’t stink, which if true would be the only part of his body that doesn’t reek. He’s babbling on about how he is going to start designing everything for Nicky, blah, blah, blah. This is probably part mind games with the other people, and part Santino just being a natural dick.
"These aren't the droids you're looking for.."
Next we have the group assembled before the dazzling Heidi Klum who is going to tell them about their next assignment. But first we have to eliminate a model. Tarah and Rachael (?) are on the chopping block and Santino decides to go with Tarah, because as he says "If there’s one thing I am its a loyal person". Funny, If I had to choose what one thing Santino is, I would've gone with "smegmaish".
Heidi then fills them in on their next project. They are going to DEE-sign a day/night dress for Banana Republic. Something, she says, that will truly reflect the “Banana Republic Woman". To me the Banana Republic woman is someone who wanders the streets avoiding the guerilla soldiers with machetes. But I guess you can’t really design for that. And if you did it would be something that breathes when you run. Then I realized this was Banana Republic the store. And that’s a whole different thing.
This challenge will require each of them to mold their individual visions to a national brand. And they can only choose from the Banana Republic approved fabrics. So no frantic trip to Mood this week. They have to pick all the pre approved fabrics placed in front of them.
After a few minutes of frantic fabric grabbing (always a funny moment every week) the ever dapper Tim Gunn wanders in and drops a bomb on them. Everyone will be split into teams of 2 to work on one outfit. And they have to pick their partners….NOW! They all scramble to pick someone that they hope won’t suck. Unfortunately Marla picks Diana, which sucks because Marla is a waste of space and I don’t want her to drag my Dirty Diana down with her. To my delight the six foot 7 Emmett chooses 4’3 Chloe as her partner thus ensuring an hour of uninterrupted visual comedy watching them stand next to each other. Daniel V and Andrae choose each other and right out of the gate they tell us they are “thinking as one person�. Could this lead to both of them crying like a 5 year old girl with a skinned knee on the runway? Only time will tell. Nick has the unfortunate task of being partnered with Santino, who right from the beginning begins to take over the entire project as if it’s all about him. Zulema gets paired with the emotionally fragile Barbie hat loving Kara with the hard to place accent. At first I was thinking Australian, but she sounded too much like the bad guy from Lethal Weapon 2 ("Diplomatic Immunity!") so I'm gonna say she's from South Africa. And lo and behold, I'm right.
As they all pair off and start to work on their initial ideas, Tim Interrupts them once again to drop yet another bomb. The losing team this week will both be eliminated. Kara and Zulema, who evidently have never seen a reality show in their lives, are stunned at the news. After Tim’s announcement he tells them "This is the classic make it work time" Woo hoo! You’ll have to excuse me I’m playing the "make it work" drinking game so from now on my typing may get sloppier.
Diana comes up with the idea of a pencil skirt. I have no idea what that is but a quick internet search reveals a pencil skirt to be a “Popular skirt shape cut from a straight block from hip to hem. Often knee length and worn with suit jackets�. For examples look here. This show teaches me something new every week. Marla however tells us that she doesn’t believe in the idea %100, but Marla is horrible and she plagiarizes other peoples stuff, so she can just go suck it.
| 1 | 2 | 3 Next Page... ( Comments ) | Discuss In Our Forums