The Ryan King - 
by copygodd
TheDave asks Storm why she always seems like she wants to sing in the bottom three. "Any chance to rock out for these guys and with this band is good for me," she answers. TheDave asks how she'd feel if she were in the bottom three tonight. "Pretty good," she says, "because I'd get to kick the snot out of something again." Jeez, I hope her puppy doesn't have a cold.
Next, TheDave asks Dilana if it's hard to think about saying goodbye to her friends. That's a real poser, since Dilana hasn't had any friends for nearly 27 centuries now. She tells TheDave it's extremely hard. In fact, it's like losing a limb. It reminds her of the time she had to chew off her left leg to escape a trap set by Azathoth in the caves of the Abyss. But that's another story for another time. Preferably over a tankard of elfin marrow.
TheDave asks Magni how he liked sitting for their In Touch photo shoot. Magni says he hated it. But that's only because Magni, like all Icelanders, is bred not to sit still for more than a few minutes at a time, for fear of sticking to a block of ice. In the middle of his explanation, TheDave interrupts, only to have Magni slap his pedophile ass down with a stern "Don't you interrupt me, young man." TheDave does not take kindly to this, and tells Magni "This is my show, sucka! And let me tell you this: This whole season, I've been saying things like 'I've got nothing to do with the vote... I've got no influence over these guys... My fingers do not smell like children... 'I lied, you sonofabitch." Ha! Even through my TV, I knew TheDave stank of children!
Finally, TheDave says enough of the yappin', he wants to get to the rockin'! And with that, Jason introduces the new Supernova song, called "It's On". He says they had all the rockers audition, and the lucky singer tonight is Lukas of the Shire. So fire up the one-hits, kids, it's time for some Hobbit-rock!
I forget who said it in the forums, but Tommy Lee drums like the fate of the world depended on his keeping the beat. If only Lukas sang like the fate of the world depended on his being intelligible. I really can't say if the song is any good or not, because I can't understand a damn word he says. Of course, that could just be my percocet cocktail, but I kind of doubt it.
After the break, Brooke announces the winner of "Best Supernova Website" contest. Since it's not me, I don't give a shit.
Before we get to this week's encore, Gilby reminds the rockers that they still have a record to put together. So tomorrow he's going to take the remaining five rockers over to Gibson for a songwriting clinic. And he's going to help each of them individually write a new Supernova track. I wonder if any of them will be as memorable as Gilby's many other hits.
Next, it's time for the encore. After TheDave said that Dilana's performance last night was the best he's seen in two seasons, it's got to be her, right? Wrong. It's Toby, resinging "Rebel Yell" by Billy Idol. Will he bring another group of hoochies up on stage with him? Nope, but he does rub Magni's head for luck.
"Oh, baby..."
Brooke retakes the stage to reveal the bottom three. As I told you just a few paragraphs back, it was Ryan, Storm and Lukas. But those were just the initial results. Over the course of the evening, Toby and Dilana were also in the bottom three. That means everyone but Magni has a chance to be eliminated tonight. Looks like rubbing his own head all night paid off for the Iceman.
TheDave says he's surprised by the results: "After last night's performances, nobody should be standing up." Especially T-Bag, who's still dreaming of Toby's hoochies.
Okay, this is where the show gets confusing. Brooke says that tonight is the first time we've ever known who has received the most votes. Don't they count the votes every week? How else do they know who's in the bottom three? I'm definitely calling shenanigans on this one.
The first rocker in the real bottom three is Magni. Nah, just kidding. It's Ryan. To save his angsty ass, he'll be singing "Baba O'Riley" by The Who. Or should I say screaming? Here's the thing with Ryan: he has a really good voice, but only when he sings. And this song isn't meant to be sung; it's meant to be screamed. And Ryan's not a good screamer. He tries to amp up his performance, spraying a bottle of champagne, climbing on and jumping off the speakers, showing some plumber's crack, but it just seems like he's trying too hard.
That's gonna leave a mark.
Next in the bottom three is Storm, who's really excited for the chance to perform again. Not because she's a camera whore or anything... She's going to cover "Helter Skelter," one of her favoritist Beatles tunes of all time, and, in her opinion, one of the first punk rock songs ever. Thank goodness The Beatles did it originally and not Storm, or punk rock would never have existed.
Previous page | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 Next Page... ( Comments ) | Discuss In Our Forums