Lana Gets Possessed by an Evil Slut - 
by J-Unit
Although I am enjoying this season of Smallville, sometimes I wonder about the writers and their train of thought. I mean, I am not one to pass judgment about fixating promiscuous young women (after a season of Buffy and Riley and Buffy and Spike, I am immune), but it's like the show just received an influx of writers used to writing for films with names like Passion Designer and A Midsummer Night's Cream One thing I do like is the expanded role of the ancestors of Krypton in the form of ancient myths from Europe, Africa, and South America. I generally like the way Smallville has expanded the Superverse, as it gives those of us who haven't had the opportunity to follow the comics as much as we like (or at all) to get a taste of some of the other characters. Personally, I am waiting for them to introduce Gus Gorman, played by Richard Pryor in Superman III, but I may be the only one hoping for that.
A lot of the early part of this season has centered on the walls of the cave in Smallville with all of the Kryptonian symbols. So far, we know that there are three stones that are said to hold great power and whoever possesses them will have a wealth of knowledge previously unknown to any person alive. Clark has one stone already inside the cave. He stole it from Lex, who was digging up some things in Egypt. We know the location of a second stone, the one that means water or transference. Lionel used it to temporarily switch bodies with Clark, and it is know in the hands Bridgette Crosby of the Swann Institute. Lana has the same symbol on the transference stone tattooed on her body thanks, it seems, to an old relative, who was burned at the stake in France for being a witch, and that is how we start off this week.
We have a flashback to 1604, and although French Catholics were mostly busy ridding themselves of those crazy Protestants at the time, who can't find some time to burn a few witches at the stake? Lana's ancestor, the Countess Isabella Thoureau(also played by Kristin Kreuk) was just about to get burned at the stake along with two of her accomplices. Somehow, somebody had taken their book of spells, so of course the were powerless. Before you execute anybody, you have to give them one last chance to live, and that is the case here as the mayor or whoever is ordering the immolation asks Isabella one more time about her witchcraft. Isabella sees that he has the book and wants to know about the "three stones of power". She casts a spell, which places the now familiar tattoo on her back, and then spits some blood on the book. The mayor, having enough, orders the peasants (who sound more Piker than they do French) light the pyres, and the flames engulf the witches. Isabella is cackling hysterically, so you know that it's going to take more than burning her alive to get rid of her for good.
Back in more recent times, Jason and Lana are enjoying some time to themselves. Poor Jason, he loses his job at the Smallville High, and now the only thing occupying his time is this hot 18 year old piece of ass he's living with. Lana has been researching the Countess, after all that happened to her in France, and used all of her money to buy the Countess' manuscript off of eBay, which is better than the generic used book salesman shows usually drag out when they usually have to find an ancient text. Lana opens the book and finds the page with the blood. She touches the blood, and we can see that when Isabella spat on the book in the first place, it was the final step in a transference spell. Isabella takes over Lana's body, and begins to go to work on whatever she had planned 400 years ago, and she has her powerful book to help her.
Isabella is mixing up some sort of potion, and the next ingredient just happens to be the hair from two virgins. (Why do so many spells need body parts or blood of virgins?) She takes a tug from Lana, inspects it, and decides that Lana has been a very good girls and can use her hair. I was wondering what else besides a summer in Paris it would take for Jason to get in her pants. At that moment, Chloe and Lois walk in. Lois is in town planning Chloe's surprise 18th birthday party. Clark's parents are out of town, so they are having the party in his barn. Just in case you were wondering if it could get any more like Risky Business, we learn that a recruiter from Princeton is coming over to talk with Clark. Nothing bad can come of this, especially with Lois at the help. Anyway, Isabella grabs some of Lois' hair and is disgusted. Apparently Lois gets around, because she doesn't have virgin hair, and Isabella must seek out another virgin's locks.
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