The episode began with Alex complaining about Stephanie's sense of entitlement. Unfortunately, you can't change someone who's been that way for 27 years, he reasoned. So Stephanie had an air of entitlement at age two? What did she do? Tell the other toddlers they were destined to lives of menial labor? Nevertheless, she returned from the boardroom and addressed the team about her perceived negativity. "I appreciate the constructive criticism," she sniffled in between tears. Bren comforted her with a hug that seemed to say "There there, young harpy."

The next morning, Rhona called in from her new desk which was conveniently located in front of a framed headline of Trump that read "MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE!" Sadly, had the camera panned a few more inches to the right, we would have also seen a framed picture of Frankie Avalon with the headline "MASTER OF RHONA'S UNIVERSE." No word yet on whether He-Man has any intentions to win back either of those titles.

Anyway, Rhona instructed everyone to meet Donald Trump at the Playstation offices in mid-town. There, the group waited in the lobby while The Donald made awkward chit chat with the Sony reps. "How's Playstation?" Trump asked, oddly eschewing the normal use of "the". It sort of was the equivalent of going into Crate & Barrel and saying "What's new with Desk? How about Chair?" Anyway, Trump addressed the candidates by alerting them that they'd be designing a graffiti mural to hawk the latest PS2 game, Gran Turismo 4. The urban billboards would be assessed by a focus group and whichever team best markets the product in the eyes of the Playstation guys would win. So basically the team would be... painting? Not the most entrepreneurial task, but I guess its marketing angle counts for something. Right? Okay, let's face it. Mark Burnett just wanted to stick all these people in Harlem for a day and see what would happen.

In an amazing feat of physics and modern technology, Tara suddenly opened her mouth and began to talk. Turns out she was Project Manager for Net Worth. Who would have thunk it? "I understand Harlem," she told us, adding "By the way, I am black." Tara and the team gathered together, played some GT4, and then brainstormed some ideas. Audrey casually mentioned all the unique environments in the game — urban, dessert, forrest, etc. Equipped with all this information, Tara began her crusade to enlighten the Harlem community with a socially conscious graffiti mural. It had something to do with a car driving out of the mean streets of New York, as evidenced by angry buildings possibly shouting (with Maine accents) "You leave us alone, you hear? This city don't care much for flashy cars and short dresses! Now let's go eat some chowda."

"I think I'd lose a lot of street credibility if Magna wins this," Tara laughed haughtily. First sign of ebbing street cred? Calling street cred "street credibility".

Alex, meanwhile, became the Project Manager of Magna. He felt confident about his mission because, as he stated, "I play video games. I went to college." Interesting. And based on the motel refurbishing mission, Magna won that because they learned how to party in college. So let that be a lesson to you folks: go to college and you'll never be creative unless it comes to video games and partying. Works for me!

Anyway, Alex and the team met with various graffiti artists before settling down with Lady Pink, and no, she wasn't an errant porn star carrying a can of spray paint for whippets. Lady Pink was a bona fide street artist who just happened to have a very lesbian-friendly name. Sadly her friends Kitty Snatch and Madame Vagina were nowhere to be found.

After deciding on artists, both teams headed to their walls and got to work shilling for Sony. The producers opted to shun their usual jazzy soundtrack for a more urban selection of public domain tracks. Yes, tonight's Apprentice was full of record scratches and hip singers occasionally chirping "Uh!" and "Oh yeah!" Yes, nothing says the streets of Harlem like music worthy of a Tae-Bo video. I could have done without the pandering, pseudo-urban soundtrack, but then I figured it was probably just promotion for Will Smith's new single, "Switch". Rejoice, Bar-Mitzvah DJs.

Speaking of urban malaise, the college kids from Magna struggled to come up with a concept for their billboard. With nothing left to do, they got to work painting jungle vines on the bottom of the wall. Uh, guys. Just so you know — the urban jungle is not actually a jungle. Stephanie and Bren, who had spoken with Sony's people about the audience they were trying to reach, actually pointed this out, but Erin defended it, saying it was "urban". Sigh. I'm glad she didn't say something foolish like "Besides, black people come from the jungle, right?"

Posted by B-side on February 25, 2005 7:43 PM