Although she hasn't put anybody on the cover of French Vogue yet, Janice is still very proud of her models and her company. Clients are coming in from all over the place, which Janice says speaks well to the agency, but again, I say that it speaks mostly to the fact that she has her own television crews all over the place. Still, it was a big day for the company when Chip Dorsch, head of the new Virgin fashion line, and Niki Shadrow, aspiring fashion producer, showed up to pick some guys and girls for a runway show that was happening at the Virgin Megastore.

After careful consideration, Nikki and Chip made their picks. Among them were "veterans" like Stina and Ms. Fargo, but we also had a bunch of first timers like Nyabel, Claudia (the transsexual), and Brittany, the 16 year-old that Janice found in Vegas. The guys included Chris, Tony Perez, and Marcus.

All of this is great news, but Janice does have a slight problem in that none of her models can really walk, and she promised that they would be able to walk in time for the shoot. To tell you the truth, this is probably not that big of a deal for this particular shoot. This show was not going to be part of any larger fashion show, but rather a one-time thing that was taking place in the store itself. Putting together a fashion show doesn't mean that you are the height of haute couture. As of this writing, the Virgin website doesn't even list Virginware (as the clothing line is called) on the website in the US. Therefore, I can only imagine that if Ms. Shadrow or Janice fuck up, not that many people are going to notice.

Janice took all of her models, men and women, to Level 3 studios for their walking lesson. You may remember from the audition episodes that Janice did single out Claudia for having a great walk, but even she could learn a few things, so Janice had a couple of drag queens come over and teach them how to walk. Now, I have been doing writing on various modeling shows for a while now, but can somebody take some time and explain to me why men dressing up as women are always the ones that walk the best? Is it the hair? The makeup? The attitude? Is it because they always have to be conscious about not walking around like they have balls?

While the girls seemed to be fairly receptive about the idea of learning their walks, the guys seemed to have a really big problem with it, like they were somehow above learning how to walk from guys wearing dresses, as if it was somehow going to impugn on their masculinity. Come on! These guys are male models! Sure they may not be effeminate and some of them have rugged looks, but they are still male models! Did you see the guys when they were packing for New York? There were more soaps and lotions than the Clinique counter! How can they turn their noses at walking lessons from a couple of drag queens? If football players can take ballet, then these jerks can surely learn a thing or two about the runway from a couple of dudes dressed as women.

You probably thought that the drag queens were the strangest part of the lesson, but you would of course be wrong. Janice proceeded to trot out a couple of belly dancers because she wanted everybody to be comfortable with their bodies. Oh, I've got an idea, why don't you point out all of their bad parts with a sharpie! That will make them feel better! I guess I can kind of understand how belly dancers could make you feel more comfortable with your body, but as our favorite model booker Kodi Foster said, it might be a lot for them to be taking in all at once. These people could barley walk a few minutes, and now you've got them gyrating all over the place? Smells like a recipe for disaster, and to top it all off, Janice was upset that some of the models were shy about walking around in their underwear. She was showing NO mercy, not even for the people who showed up to the lesson not wearing any underwear. See, if you are going to do French Vogue, you are going to have to be willing to show a little boob or a little pube every now and then. But come on Janice, not everybody is so comfortable showing their ass off in public.

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Posted by J-Unit on July 31, 2006 4:49 PM