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Once Upon a Time In Mexico - TVgasm

by J-Unit

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vm1-25-05UPN made us wait a long time for the return of Veronica Mars. It's been so long since our latest episode that UPN, having formed an unholy alliance with The WB, doesn't really even exist anymore. Since my last recap, I have been hard at work preaching the gospel of Veronica Mars, and can report that I have successfully recruited half of my parents, and all of my sisters living in Florida. By the time I was on my way back home (delayed in PHL, unable to connect to SBC Freedomlink, forced to get sloshed to pass the time), I was completing my third cycle of the DVD set. I think I have my addiction under control, but I nearly threw the DVDs back in when I saw there was no episode last week. I desperately needed to know what happened to Meg's baby, and what would it mean for Veronica and Duncan, and were they going to explain why Wallace was back, and, well, we got the answers to all of those questions, and it was worth the wait.

As you might expect, it's been a pretty difficult holiday for Duncan. Let's face it, he is pretty fragile and his parents aren't that supportive, so finding out he is a father and then the mother of that child dying just a few weeks later could have sent him back to Cuba really quickly. Veronica wanted to check up on Duncan, and she happened to bump into Logan on the way there. We all know what I think of Logan's head, but I think his wardrobe is starting to bug me a little more, and I couldn't figure out why he only sported half of a pride patch on each arm. When these two are together, the room is either filled with gobs of sexual tension or pure bile. This evening was the latter, with Logan saying "hi ho", which Veronica took to mean "Hi, ho", but was meant to preface "off to work we go". With that explanation, the working girl slur didn't hurt so much, and Veronica sort of liked being thought of as Snow White.

Veronica wasn't interested in Sleazy, so she went to see if Mopey was in his room. Mopey was nowhere to be found, however, and instead, there was Slutty. If you folks aren't following, Duncan was nowhere to be found in his bedroom, and Veronica was quite surprised to see Kendall Casablancas there, enjoying herself to a nice hot shower - exactly the type of shower you take after getting all hot and heavy with a woman. Thinking that her prince charming was with the flexible witch of the west was too much, and Veronica left, giving Logan and Kendall a chance to make fun of each other about how much the other enjoyed making the sex, but just wouldn't admit it.

We all know that getting back together with Duncan was difficult for both him and Veronica. While the circumstances surrounding their original breakup were crazy enough that you couldn't fault them for being together, Duncan seemed to be very happy with Meg. A lot of people think that things would have been a lot easer if Duncan had stayed with Meg and Veronica stuck with Logan, Meg might even be alive. Still, since there is a lot of history with the Duncan and Veronica relationship that we only get in flashbacks, I think we have to give the two of them a shot for trying.

None of this means that the people around them can't give them advice. Dick Casablancas takes it upon himself to educate Veronica on the ways of being a billionaire's trophy wife. Girls like Kendall let guys do things to them that make girls like Veronica thankful that there are girls like Kendall. I guess that's one way of putting it. Veronica doesn't take Dick's advice about letting it all go for the sake of some points on the purity test. She confronts Duncan, but he doesn't want to answer questions. Poor Veronica, even when Meg is dead she is some pretty good competition (has to be the legs). Duncan decides that he has had enough of Veronica, and breaks up with her, and almost the entire school was there to witness it.


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