Author: Hypnotoad

You need to get those expectations LOWERED, beyotch. Like, almost touching the ground.

The episode title is misleading. Just like my initial excitement for this episode.

Lucas is more tweaked out than Courtney Love on an average Tuesday.

Another new character who you’ll forget about until season 4. Probably.

Two of the 426 unanswered questions are answered.

Two recaps for the low, low price of one!

Grab those hankies and say goodbye to the Ladies of the Lane.

Series finale part one! Save your tears for part two, kids.

Antepenultimate episode goodness.

Carlos and Gabby fight because it’s an episode of this show.

The Fairview police make Chief Wiggum look like Sipowicz.

When life hands you lemons, make jam from them and smash the jar against the wall.

Ready to find out who “A” is?

Someone died last week. Commence requisite flashback episode.

More plots! More questions! No answers!

In which someone sexy dies and I want to kick Marc Cherry’s ass.

More questions, never answers.

Something blows up and Susan makes more poor decisions.

Maya gives us many more reasons to hate her. MANY.

Chocolate, flowers, and being a boozy whore. Yup. It’s Valentine’s Day, all right.

The truth, much like a punch to the crotch, hurts.

Who has 2 thumbs and hates Maya? This recapper.

This week’s episode includes 2 bonus angst montages.

I do not want your slut muffins, Bree Van de Kamp!

R.I.P., Edie Britt. You’re up in heaven now, giving crabs to Benjamin Franklin.

Bree, you ignorant slut!

Oh, Aria. There’s “close,” and then there’s Glenn Close. In Fatal Attraction.

Mike has his shirt off. A lot. That’s really all that matters.

Let the Clay Aiken-ing begin!

Suicides and people getting hit by cars. Ah, classic Desperate Housewives.

When in doubt, get hammered by yourself.

Shartist’s Residence

A fresh DH mini for you to chew on.

Trick or . . . Well, That’s Pretty Much It

It’s Halloween time on Wisteria Lane, which means that anything can happen. But more specifically, something happens.

Even the homeless think Bree’s cooking is pretentious.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

There’s actual continuity in this one. It’s strange . . .

Elvira Aguilera The PLL bitches are back!  And they are ready to prequel your asses off. It’s 2008.  No, not right now.  You didn’t go back in time, it’s just the show.  And all the girls look different, except Emily who was apparently even MORE bland 3 years ago.  I know.  And even though Alison [...]