Author: InternetSensation

Hello, beautiful yous! It’s IS taking over Charm School for the rest of the season. And I couldn’t be happier about it. I actually started writing for the ‘Gasm about a year ago because I wanted to recap Rock of Love, so I am beyond thrilled my ROL dreams are coming true. (Yes, I dream [...]

And now the moment we’ve all been waiting for: when two men come together in the competitive spirit of sportsmanship only to learn that they love each other best. Friendship: the real prize. I am sad to announce that this is the season finale of The Pick Up Artist. Let’s embrace and be each other’s [...]

The friends are here! New boys to makeover and humiliate! And we are just one week out from the exciting conclusion of The Pick Up Artist! Doesn’t it feel like we just got here? I’m just not ready to say good-bye. Let’s make this last forever.

Let’s just rename this show now: Dick Up Artist, anyone? This was the freeze frame we settled on to leave on the TV after the Pick Up Artist viewing party last Sunday, which means it’s no longer debatable: This is the gayest hour on television, people. Look at this love, this satisfaction. It’s a moving [...]

Feels so right when we hug real tight. EEEeeeeeEEE! That’s me making dolphin noises I’m so excited that it’s that time again. Pick-up Artist time! Since I last spoke with you all I went to my hometown of Atlanta, unsuccessfully stalked the Housewives and lined up a party this weekend with Mystery and cast. It’s [...]

What are we, chopped liver? I know, I know. A week without me. And we’re already down to the final six! Are we really picking them off this quickly? I feel like we were just getting started on crazy adventure to find lust (with girls) and love (with men). This week the men attempt to [...]

Lighing yourself on fire: the new way to game chicks. We’re back! The boys are lookin’ good, feelin’ good, ready to learn some material to take to the field! They are so close a random hook up they can taste it. I know you’ve been waiting for this recap all week and it’s true I’ve [...]

Does this man: a) Live for Ren Fests? b) Consider Hot Topic’s 1998 winter catalogue to be the last word in fashion? c) Make Liberace look butch? d) Teach thousands of men how to get laid and get more ass than the proverbial toilet seat? After the jump, people:

Lady Sensation’s guilty face. Hello lovers! Fluffy and I decided to run away together and be mermaids for a few weeks and now we’re back and better than ever. Or fatter. Either way, please don’t hate me. But I do like to be punished. Now you know. Let’s read on.

When you have a thinking face like this, you try not to do it too often. A lot of provocative questions were asked this week on Denise Richards. How can Fluffy get out of her single mom rut? Is she crazy? Who is lying to her? But I continue to watch this show in awe [...]

I know you have been waiting with bated breath for this recap, so without further adieu… If only I could.

And then we came to the end. And I’ll be honest with you. I’ve been recapping this show all along and watch the show at least twice each week in doing so, and found this finale to be a big ball of What The Fuck? Really, what happened? We had a pointless tribute to Sex [...]

Welcome back to week two! It’s Denise Richards versus the world this week. Or at least tabloid journalism. She also attempts to stop using the C-word, which I sure can’t figure out why she would want to. But our Itchy is complicated. And I don’t pretend to understand her mysterious ways. Read on as I [...]

If only I had one glove and a penchant for little boys. Now that would be a change. Welcome to finale part one of Step It Up and Dance! It’s all come down to this. Weeks of grueling partnering, exhausting prop work and never-ending gay Mexican hateration have brought us here. So what else is [...]

It IS complicated. IT IS! Hello, lovers. It’s Miss Internet Sensation here to delve into the latest addition into the reality canon, Denise Richards: It’s Complicated. Now, I’ll be honest, I didn’t come into this as a big Denise Richards hater. I would say she’s mostly been irrelevant in my world, but at the very [...]

This song’s fifteen minutes is lasting forever- ever- ever. Welcome back to the week, gang! I hope you had a nice long Memorial Day weekend. I got to spend a little time this weekend with a former cast member of Melrose Place, and this was a highly special experience for me as I still think [...]

Drunkenness reaches critical mass, exploding the entire group. Our time at Paradise Hotel has come to an end and we sure do go out with a whimper. The Ultimate Prize is revealed at the halfway point and then the second half is alot of hemming and hawing over how to divvy it up? Say it [...]

Reunited and it feels so gay. Gang. I know. This recap could not be any later. In my defense I’ve been out of town since last Thursday night and then my friend was visiting from out of town until yesterday. All signs pointed to me having that thing they call “a life”, and it was [...]

Reunited and it feels so gay. Gang. I know. This recap could not be any later. In my defense I’ve been out of town since last Thursday night and then my friend was visiting from out of town until yesterday. All signs pointed to me having that thing they call “a life”, and it was [...]

I can’t believe Nick married Mariah. I know you’ve been agonizing over why Grimace is back in your life and I just want to assure you that you did nothing to deserve this. We’ve all been good souls, dedicated and watching dutifully, so what did we do to merit this face again? I for one [...]

Atom bombing. Welcome to the French space disco torture chamber circus. Yeah, I know it’s a lot to take in, but when you’re a modern dancer it’s just another day on the apparatus. How do words really describe the “majesty” of swinging on a giant, silver, atom-inspired structure to Gwen Stefani music anyway? Perhaps the [...]

Anybody out there? Is there an echo in here? Am I the only one still watching this thing? Okay. So things at Paradise Hotel haven’t been the same without the excitement of body shots, government metaphors, and awesome underdogs like Charla and the Barbies ruled the roost, but we’re sticking this thing through till the [...]

Straight Men give better musical theatre action than the gay boys and Mean Gay isn’t even the most annoying one in the house.

Keep looking. Have you ever wanted to watch a show where nothing actually happened? I know, I know. You’re saying that you already watch The Hills. But those people are on quaaludes compared to our Paradise Hotel guests. It’s so much more fun to watch nothing happen with aggressive, drunk people! At this stage of [...]

When you’re with a ‘sweep, you’re in glad company! This week on Step It Up and Dance a British chimney sweep descends upon our dancers with the mission to prove once and for all that blue collar workers have impeccable rhythm and no need for expensive percussive instruments. No, it’s not Dick Van Dyke and [...]

None of these individuals took Vegas for millions counting cards in Blackjack or anything else. Hey-o! Can you believe it? A Paradise Hotel recap done this early in the week? Only the promise of long overdue drinks tomorrow with the ‘Gasm writers would get me on top of my game, so I could get out [...]

An urban dance tale is nothing without a moving back story. Let’s give it up for all the troubled-urban-youth-with-exceptional-dance-skills genre of movie! Those movies get a glorious send up this week on Step It Up and Dance, courtesy of nine dancers with a mostly tenuous grip on the art of this dance. Who will step [...]

I just really missed Amanda. The moment we’ve all been waiting for…Who’s come back to haunt the guests of Paradise Hotel like a drunk, slutty ghost? Will it be a season one guest like Man Boobs Dave, (which would be awesome)? Or are we going to be subjected to Raheim and his tedious civics analogies? [...]

Flying Hookers: worth every penny. Week two! And it’s time for our “pimps and prostitutes” week, brought to us by the chic French underground dance world of course. Those Parisians can make anything fashionable. The girls get tarted up and the boys attempt to butch up. It’s hard work for the latter group, but fun [...]

From here to next episode. Living at Paradise Hotel is not easy. It’s a hotbed of liars, gossipers, unsavory sluts, public nudity and Myrna. Who invited her to this party? Seriously. At least Raheim didn’t purse his lips in a passive-aggressive grimace every time he was not pleased. The natives are getting restless and this [...]

this is a test sorry for the inconvenience

**Note from the Editor: Alright, Gasmii. You’ve sent letters requesting this one, so please welcome InternetSensation with Step it Up and Dance! And you thought we never listened…xo It’s Nomi, bitch. Welcome to Step It Up and Dance! More than a decade later we find out what happens to Nomi Malone when she hitches her [...]

I’m not crying. I just got love dust in my eyes. Hi, everyone! Welcome to this week’s Paradise Hotel. I think everyone is relieved “The Secretary of Defense” was finally removed from his position. But now control of Paradise is up for grabs. Which party will be elected as the leaders? It’s election time, gang! [...]

I mean “Government”. Hi, everyone! Did you know that Lady Sensation lives in a time warp? And in this time warp this recap is not only on time, but early! Yes, it’s great to be delusional. I could be one of our Paradise Hotel contestants. Anyway, enough about me. Let’s slather on that SPF and [...]

Even the frog figurine gets more action than Raheim. Let’s toast to a successful roommate selection! And we have the ruling body to thank for that. The government is in working order. Didn’t y’all know? Paradise has elected officials and has recently passed a referendum outlawing common sense and decency. Get your visas, gang. Let’s [...]

I want you. To not be late again, Lady Sensation. Lady Sensation had a crazy week, gang. It’s an excuse, but no justification for abandoning you all. I do believe that above all reality television comes first, but unfortunately that’s not what my landlords say, so late it is! So, when I did have some [...]

Just for you, Lady S. Oh, gang. The day has finally arrived. It’s the last episode of this season’s My Fair Brady and I have to say, Adrienne Curry has finally made me happy. For those of you that followed my Oscar Blog a few weeks ago, y’all know that I LOVE me some tears. [...]

Patti Stanger eat your heart out. I just finished watching Hobag on the Millionaire Matchmaker season finale and I realized that I am glad she found Paradise Hotel. She was so demure and underwhelming on that, I have to confess it made me glad we got a chance to see her stripping and fingerpainting and [...]

Fun bags, that is. The twins have arrived! And thank god, I’m not talking about living, breathing progeny, but the man-made, shoved-into-your-pectoral-muscles kind. And gosh, we had a proud mama. Get her while you can. Next week is the last episode in this installment. But fear not, these probably air three times a year.