Author: m_ruv

Ashlee Simpson‘s nose job is officially out of the bag, yet she continues to be coy about it. For god’s sake, WE’RE NOT BLIND. Admittedly it’s a great nose job—nearly up there in the pantheon with the famed Chenbot nose job—but nonetheless did nothing to fix that pesky “no-talent-ass clown” trait. [Egotastic] In perhaps the [...]

Ashlee Simpson‘s nose job is officially out of the bag, yet she continues to be coy about it. For god’s sake, WE’RE NOT BLIND. Admittedly it’s a great nose job—nearly up there in the pantheon with the famed Chenbot nose job—but nonetheless did nothing to fix that pesky “no-talent-ass clown” trait. [Egotastic] In perhaps the [...]

Awwww, damned if everybody’s favorite doe-eyed anchor Anderson Cooper isn’t having a tough time maintaining an audience at CNN’s NewsNight—even among the younger demographic. I’M VINDICATED, BITCHES!!! AARON BROWN FOR PRESIDENT!! [Variety] Yesterday, just seconds after feeling the excruciating pain of his lungs nearly bursting after eight airless minutes underwater, David Blaine discovered the far [...]

Awwww, damned if everybody’s favorite doe-eyed anchor Anderson Cooper isn’t having a tough time maintaining an audience at CNN’s NewsNight—even among the younger demographic. I’M VINDICATED, BITCHES!!! AARON BROWN FOR PRESIDENT!! [Variety] Yesterday, just seconds after feeling the excruciating pain of his lungs nearly bursting after eight airless minutes underwater, David Blaine discovered the far [...]

Many moons ago, there was this show called Grey’s Anatomy. It was ostensibly about doctors and interns and surgeries and lattes but mostly about penetration. Anyway, ABC apparently decided to resurrect it this week, for the first time in what seems like decades. Here’s what happened. Meredith, light of my life, fire of my loins. [...]

Mr. T is coming back to television. In his new show—really, what else could it be called besides I Pity the Fool—he’ll travel nationwide delivering motivational advice to people struggling with “personal or professional problems.” Set to air on the TV Land network starting in October, this could potentially be the best show ever. [CBS] [...]

Mr. T is coming back to television. In his new show—really, what else could it be called besides I Pity the Fool—he’ll travel nationwide delivering motivational advice to people struggling with “personal or professional problems.” Set to air on the TV Land network starting in October, this could potentially be the best show ever. [CBS] [...]

Holy Halliburton. If you appreciate shocked silences and slow-motion train wrecks, you must MUST watch Stephen Colbert‘s in-character skewering of President Bush at the White House Correspondents’ Association dinner. By about five minutes into the routine, dear Dubya looks like he’s passing a kidney stone. (In three parts: part 1 and part 2 are hilarious; [...]

Holy Halliburton. If you appreciate shocked silences and slow-motion train wrecks, you must MUST watch Stephen Colbert‘s in-character skewering of President Bush at the White House Correspondents’ Association dinner. By about five minutes into the routine, dear Dubya looks like he’s passing a kidney stone. (In three parts: part 1 and part 2 are hilarious; [...]

Lost star Michelle Rodriguez has chosen five days in jail over 240 hours of community service as the sentence for her DUI. Hell, give her 20 to life—it’s not like they need her for shooting any new episodes since apparently they DON’T MAKE THEM ANYMORE. [AP] Britney Spears has had a rough week. First she [...]

Lost star Michelle Rodriguez has chosen five days in jail over 240 hours of community service as the sentence for her DUI. Hell, give her 20 to life—it’s not like they need her for shooting any new episodes since apparently they DON’T MAKE THEM ANYMORE. [AP] Britney Spears has had a rough week. First she [...]

Got a thing for hookers? Gambling? Hot 12-year-old-on-12-year-old action? You and Charlie Sheen could be best buds! The salacious allegations appeared in Denise Richards‘s divorce court filings at the end of last week—just in time for the debut of Mr. Sheen’s children’s clothing line (lo, how I wish I were joking). [TMZ] In May, ABC [...]

Got a thing for hookers? Gambling? Hot 12-year-old-on-12-year-old action? You and Charlie Sheen could be best buds! The salacious allegations appeared in Denise Richards‘s divorce court filings at the end of last week—just in time for the debut of Mr. Sheen’s children’s clothing line (lo, how I wish I were joking). [TMZ] In May, ABC [...]

If you’re still sawing at your wrists because Katie Couric is taking over at CBS, put down the rusty butter knife—it turns out everybody’s favorite old guy Bob Schieffer may be staying on as a commentator a couple times a week. [AP] As has been widely reported, Scientology nemesis Brooke Shields beat The Abomination Who [...]

If you’re still sawing at your wrists because Katie Couric is taking over at CBS, put down the rusty butter knife—it turns out everybody’s favorite old guy Bob Schieffer may be staying on as a commentator a couple times a week. [AP] As has been widely reported, Scientology nemesis Brooke Shields beat The Abomination Who [...]

Yep, folks, it’s placenta pilaf on the menu tonight at the Cruise-Holmes household. Rejoice, ye hordes of expectant faithful, hark the herald angels and so on and so forth, for the Miracle Child now walks among us—a 7-pound, 7-ounce, 20-inch girl named Suri. Incidentally, Suri is an old Persian word meaning “contractual obligation.” [E! online]

Yep, folks, it’s placenta pilaf on the menu tonight at the Cruise-Holmes household. Rejoice, ye hordes of expectant faithful, hark the herald angels and so on and so forth, for the Miracle Child now walks among us—a 7-pound, 7-ounce, 20-inch girl named Suri. Incidentally, Suri is an old Persian word meaning “contractual obligation.” [E! online]

If the tabloids are to be believed, Angelina Jolie still loves her some lesbo lust action. According to model and ex-Angelina trick Jenny Shimizu, Ms. Jolie is an “unbelievable lesbian lover” whose days as a sapphic sister are not yet over. [News of the World, warning NSFW] Since we all can’t get enough news of [...]

If the tabloids are to be believed, Angelina Jolie still loves her some lesbo lust action. According to model and ex-Angelina trick Jenny Shimizu, Ms. Jolie is an “unbelievable lesbian lover” whose days as a sapphic sister are not yet over. [News of the World, warning NSFW] Since we all can’t get enough news of [...]

Paula Abdul and Ryan Seacrest seem to be in the middle of a nice little bitch fight. First Ms. Abdul appears on The Tonight Show, slurring her words mightily and mocking the completely unstaged Teri-Ryan love photo; then last night on American Idol Mr. Seacrest retorts that one of the judges is drunk. Somebody PLEASE [...]

Paula Abdul and Ryan Seacrest seem to be in the middle of a nice little bitch fight. First Ms. Abdul appears on The Tonight Show, slurring her words mightily and mocking the completely unstaged Teri-Ryan love photo; then last night on American Idol Mr. Seacrest retorts that one of the judges is drunk. Somebody PLEASE [...]

Michael Douglas has apologized to Brangelina, saying that his earlier tirade against them in GQ was misquoted. Okay great, but what I want to know is when did Michael Douglas start looking like DON QUIXOTE. Although I must admit Catherine Zeta-Jones would make a great Dulcinea. [Extra, Defamer] Speaking of chivalric romance, let’s all shed [...]

Michael Douglas has apologized to Brangelina, saying that his earlier tirade against them in GQ was misquoted. Okay great, but what I want to know is when did Michael Douglas start looking like DON QUIXOTE. Although I must admit Catherine Zeta-Jones would make a great Dulcinea. [Extra, Defamer] Speaking of chivalric romance, let’s all shed [...]

Paula Abdul reported to L.A. police that a man assaulted her at a party over the weekend, grabbing her arm and throwing her against a wall. Do you ever get one of those Groundhog Day moments when you suddenly think “WTF, since when is it 1989 again and Paula Abdul is famous?” That happened to [...]

Paula Abdul reported to L.A. police that a man assaulted her at a party over the weekend, grabbing her arm and throwing her against a wall. Do you ever get one of those Groundhog Day moments when you suddenly think “WTF, since when is it 1989 again and Paula Abdul is famous?” That happened to [...]

After a week off, Grey’s Anatomy was back in fine form. As promised, it was a pretty light-hearted episode. I didn’t think the writing was quite as good as it’s been in recent weeks, but it was pretty entertaining nonetheless. And as an added bonus there was NUDIE SANDRA OH. In her profound voiceover of [...]

NBC confirmed this morning that Katie Couric’s replacement on Today will be Meredith Vieira, as was widely anticipated. On a related note, if you’re depressed at the prospect of never seeing Ms. Couric’s legs again—but what are the chances of that, frankly, she’ll probably demand a see-through newsdesk—you can take comfort in the fact that [...]

NBC confirmed this morning that Katie Couric’s replacement on Today will be Meredith Vieira, as was widely anticipated. On a related note, if you’re depressed at the prospect of never seeing Ms. Couric’s legs again—but what are the chances of that, frankly, she’ll probably demand a see-through newsdesk—you can take comfort in the fact that [...]

Apparently it’s totally acceptable to create new thetans out of wedlock, because Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have no plans to tie the knot before MiniXenu’s arrival. During an interview on a German talk show, Cruise said, “First the baby, then the film… Then, in summer, we want to get married. I won’t let this [...]

Apparently it’s totally acceptable to create new thetans out of wedlock, because Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have no plans to tie the knot before MiniXenu’s arrival. During an interview on a German talk show, Cruise said, “First the baby, then the film… Then, in summer, we want to get married. I won’t let this [...]

Move over Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes—now we have Ryan Seacrest and Teri Hatcher. HOTT. [US Weekly, via Defamer] According to her ex-fiancé, Nicolette Sheridan is no fun in the sack. Well no shit, after all the surgeries her face looks like BOSNIA. [MSNBC] Whitney Houston, please put down the crack. The gays are losing [...]

Move over Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes—now we have Ryan Seacrest and Teri Hatcher. HOTT. [US Weekly, via Defamer] According to her ex-fiancé, Nicolette Sheridan is no fun in the sack. Well no shit, after all the surgeries her face looks like BOSNIA. [MSNBC] Whitney Houston, please put down the crack. The gays are losing [...]

Scarlett Johansson has bested Angelina Jolie’s exotic t’toos to land the top spot on FHM‘s sexiest women list. With her mams so firmly in the public domain, really, how could she not. [AP] George Clooney, Matt Damon, and Brad Pitt have signed on for Ocean’s 13. AWESOME, ever since Ocean’s 12 I’ve just been DYING [...]

Scarlett Johansson has bested Angelina Jolie’s exotic t’toos to land the top spot on FHM‘s sexiest women list. With her mams so firmly in the public domain, really, how could she not. [AP] George Clooney, Matt Damon, and Brad Pitt have signed on for Ocean’s 13. AWESOME, ever since Ocean’s 12 I’ve just been DYING [...]

Since the world clearly is wanting for exposure to Britney Spears‘s breasts, midriff, and vagina, a New York sculptor has created a “pro-life” monument to Ms. Spears’s timeless act of motherhood. The life-size sculpture features Ms. Spears on all fours on a bearskin rug, ass in the air, ready to pop out some younguns. I [...]

Since the world clearly is wanting for exposure to Britney Spears‘s breasts, midriff, and vagina, a New York sculptor has created a “pro-life” monument to Ms. Spears’s timeless act of motherhood. The life-size sculpture features Ms. Spears on all fours on a bearskin rug, ass in the air, ready to pop out some younguns. I [...]

Well Grey’s Anatomy is officially on a roll. It’s so hot right now I’D BURN MY FINGER IF I TOUCHED IT. This week was great: Meredith is becoming more fun again, Cristina and Izzie had a hilarious run-in, and it was nice to see Dr. Webber featured. In other news, god damn was my recap [...]

As expected, South Park killed off Chef. Something weird is up though: past interviews show that Isaac Hayes had actually been pretty relaxed about the show’s jibes at Scientology, and there are rumors that he suffered a severe stroke back in January that’s been kept under wraps. Odd. [BBC] Paula Abdul is blaming all her [...]

As expected, South Park killed off Chef. Something weird is up though: past interviews show that Isaac Hayes had actually been pretty relaxed about the show’s jibes at Scientology, and there are rumors that he suffered a severe stroke back in January that’s been kept under wraps. Odd. [BBC] Paula Abdul is blaming all her [...]