Author: P-Baby Walker

Christian Bale thins his hair instead of his belly in hopes of Oscar gold.

Natalie Portman wants an Oscar. Bad.

The winner is crowned. Finally.

Tyra makes her directing debut and two go home.

Go Sees become No Sees in Milan.

The girls ditch Venica, CA for Venice, Italy!

Could a Satan zygote also be called a deviled egg?

Ann eats pavement. At least she’s finally eating.

One is selected to trollop around the Grammys; finally a prize I can get on board with.

Patrick Demarchelier appears and Vogue’s Hell freezes over.

A conveyor belt proves to be the biggest bitch of all.

The girls dress up as mermaids. Oh, and no one likes Kacey.

Makeovers(unders?) occur and two go home.

Calorie restricted diets are the new pink.

Tyra picks the Top 14 hungriest in all the land.

A Rock Biter… A Rock Biter!

Til I hear it from youuuu…

How to Avoid Serial Killers 101.

God, I hope Heather is really dead…

The movie Disney wants to forget…

Chad Michael Murray and the Squint of Sex.

Dance magic dance…

#1 on the Christmas List this year. Cotton Candy ray gun.

Pop Quiz Hot Shot. Your career peaked at Neo. What do you do?

Just let me lay here in the sun….

Remember when Freddie Prinze Jr. was an A-Lister? Neither do I.

It’s 100 degrees outside. Christmas in July! Ho ho ho!

Roller Coaster. Need I say more?

Soooo….Jennifer Aniston’s career kinda sucks. But her legs are great!

Another crappy rom-com. These things are like crack.

Cussing devil doll vs. Annie Camden. Come to mama!

Did anyone else want to jump Ted’s bones?

Salute Your Shorts. Come hither Donkeylips.

Cary Elwes overacts. Enough said.

Timothy Olyphant stars in a movie. Count me in!

Submitted for the approval of the Gasmii society, I call this story the tale of the washed-up actor.

Tom is nuts. Cameron gets roofied. Who knew this was a documentary?

“Be my victim,” and other effective pick-up lines.

Sorcerers and Boobies and Spooging, Oh My!