So, a lot happened this season. A tone-deaf Cuban kid with a sizable wang stuttered his way into the Top [...]
Great news, everybody. This episode will only be an hour long, so we can all squeeze in some Hurricane Nia [...]
Only one week left, thank Gokey. To remind us that this program is a joke compared to its competitors, Ryan [...]
Hope you all are recovering from Amber’s unjust dismissal last week. I’ve been so upset that this show was dead [...]
We return for the results show after an episode that made everyone question their worldview: Is Randy Jackson not the [...]
Make some noise for your Top Four! Wait – Top Four? Oh, that’s right. Last week was an effing joke [...]
The one redeeming quality of this show is that I get to see someone’s heart shatter into a million pieces [...]
Another week, another jaunt to the children’s hospital. When this show isn’t cringe-worthy or mind-numbingly boring, it’s downright depressing. [...]
Welcome back, loyal viewer! The show starts with a pre-recorded video of the Top 5 talkin’ ’bout issues and how [...]
I’ll leave who the stupid hoe is up to you, but in my opinion, spelling the ebonics pronunciation of “whore” [...]
Welcome back, fellow person who still watches American Idol. So how does one go from the Top [...]
Welcome back, glitter fairies and unicorns and other things found in Ryan Seacrest’s underpants. This week, the Idol producers responded [...]
As you can see from the photo above, the dress code the producers issued to the judges was “Evening Gowns [...]
”Wonder if Cee Lo makes more than I do?” It’s been a long hard week of excluding Lazaro from group activities [...]
The show opens with the contestants standing in two straight lines as Ryan goes into some bunk about how the [...]
Sugar Pie Honey Pile of Steaming Crap Cake. Great news – it’s Detroit Night! Coneys and urban prairie for everybody! Smokey [...]
A stutter and some tears = reality show Kryptonite. As challenging as it is to take an elderly gentleman dressed like [...]
Don’t cry. There are other too-hot-and-young-for-you fish in the sea. Sad single Ryan puts on a brave face and shows up for [...]
No urban hangers!!!!! Ryan kicks off the show, accompanied by ear-splitting decibels of teen shrieks. I feel like I’m at a Michael Jackson [...]
She’s late, she’s late, for a very important show nobody watches anymore. Our Top 10 has had a week off to [...]
If anything’s askew, it’s Angie Miller’s hair. After the harrowing experience of having to hear songs by Fergie and Colton [...]
RUFIO! RUFIO! We’re back in Vegas for the Guys Semi Final Round. Yes, this is a rather effeminate bunch, [...]
***Please welcome your newest recapper to the fold to take over American Idol, TripleThick!! Since there are 500 hours of [...]
It’s sudden death…but not the kind that happens to up-and-coming rappers on the Strip. Drive-by shooting leads to 6-vehicle collision; 3 dead It’s been [...]
Otherwise known as, “Our last ditch effort to become relevant.” Howdy Gasm guys and gal! Plockness monster here and I am [...]
Group Round Takes Its Toll On The Ladies Hey there, Gasmii! Did everyone have a happy made-up-holiday-to-convince-people-to-buy-cards-chocolate-and-jewelry? I so love that it’s [...]
Don’t sing Bruno Mars. Bruno Mars can barely sing Bruno Mars.
Hey Gasmii! My name is Dashley, and I am a recovering Idol-holic. I used to watch this show religiously, forsaking [...]
I’m going to keep a running tab of how many times Ryan Seacrest says SUPERSTAR and if it gets into [...]
Hi, Gasmii! PopePhilly here with another round of “American Idol” auditions. I’ll be honest, I didn’t realize this show was [...]
Some people sing well, some don’t, and there’s a fungal infection.
We’re in Chicago, Gasmii, for Episode 2 of Season 12. Do you think Lady Butterfly is going to push Black [...]
It’s the season premiere of American Idol. Where better to start than New York.
So here we are. The finale. This has been a season of ups and downs. Mostly downs as this was [...]
This is…finally the finale. Not that I haven’t enjoyed this season but all I want, once a competition begins, is to know who the winner is.
Uh-oh … our opening montage is a combo of Paul Simon’s Home with slo-mo videos of the Final Three performing [...]
This … is Episode THIRTY-SEVEN of Season 11? Holy Shitballs! This “reality” show needs to self-edit, although all the ad [...]
SO I have found that there is a slight problem with doing my recaps so quickly. Sometimes the places where I get my episode pics are not as fast as I am. Rather than be patient and wait I am going to type each song into Google and get my pictures for this episode from there.
I feel like I should be walking through a mall and this is what is going on on that weird stage they set up by a bookstore.
Wow. Up is down and down is up. Contestants that have consistently given the suck turned it around tonight and, dare I say, the good contestants bit the green weenie.







