Abby’s Ultimate Dance Competition Recap: Double The Fun

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By fatcamp | | 9:58 am | 15 Comments

Lindsay Lohan times ten.

Up first for the main event are Elizabeth and Madison with jazz contemporary.   Yikes.  They look alright individually, but so far they aren’t doing well as a duo.

Where is Carrie when you need her?

The girls seem to recover, Abby smiles, and Madison snatches Elizabeth’s crown at the end.  Overall, I think it was deece, and they are definitely moving on. 

Crown or not, this bitch acts a winner.

Abby judges…ugh typing her name is so exhausting.  I’m calling her Liz from now on…Liz, and once again references the mysterious foot-turning-out issue.  Will one of you kind gasmii please explain to me what the fuck that means and why it’s important?  Abby always harps on it, and I need to know.

Richy thinks..oops it’s EliSabeth..Lis was faking it.  Abby says Madison didn’t hold her pose.  Pauxse pas.  I’m not going to say what Robin says because she’s irrelevant and I hate her.

The jazz number is next with Lexine and Hadley.  Let’s all relive our economic woes through privileged childrens’ dance!

 P.S. Kevin could use a little botox. I can get you a discount, boo! (in exchange for favors)

“That’s mine, bitch!  It’s a knockoff anyway!”

You gasmii!  They look like they’re doing very well, and I’m so happy! 

PERF

Their dance immediately earns two finger wags from Richy.  I hate him, but I have to agree.

Richy and the Technicolor Gaycoat appove.

Abby chides Lexine for not turning her feet out during her entrance, and I once again ask you all why the fuck that is important.  Richy loved her though.  Abby tells Hadley she needs to fix her clenched feet.  Robin says nothing but loved H too.

The hip hop number is next with Jordyn and Amanda about addiction to technology.  The girls get going, and I hate to say it, but Jordyn does have……gulp….swag. 

Excuse me while I vomit.  I’ve never even typed that word.

fatcamp
About

I'm a mystery wrapped in a riddle, wrapped in silk charmeuse with bitchy trim.  I have an abusive relationship with television, a penchant for making fun of everything, and a need to make people laugh.  By day I conduct clinical research having to do with ladyparts.  By night, I'm Darkwing Duck.  This nerd is five by five and ready to go.  If you love me that much, you can find me at twitter @fatcamp

15 Comments

  1. 1
    alice
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 12:05 pm

    LOVE THESE FIGHTING MOMS!!!!
    i bet the boy wins the whole thing!!!!

  2. 2
    Dani
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 12:19 pm

    Great recap!! You had me laughing so hard! I also hate Yvette AND Robin!! They couldn’t come up with a halfway decent judge??

    Ok, so my top two are Brianna and Madison. My third spot I am not sure about… I think Hadley is good, but the fact that I absolutely hate her mother makes me not want her to win (I know that is horrible, but can’t help it..). I really like Lexine, Zach and Jordyn. Haven’t seen too much of Amanda, but I like her too. So, my top 2 are definitely Brianna and Madison, but could be swayed by that last spot.. :)

  3. 3
    Dani
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 12:26 pm

    Oh, also, I think Hadley is 12 or 13, but I agree her mom does look OLD. Don’t know how old she really is, but she could have had her around age 40 and she’s now 53 but looks older than that.. Stay out of the sun evil lady!!

  4. 4
    Gwen
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 4:53 pm

    “Amanda and Jordyn are doing a hip hop trio.” <—Two people do not constitute a trio! :P

    When Hadley said that 99% thing I rewound it and played it for my dad. I thought it was hilarious.

    I would have to say my top three would be Madison, Brianna, and Hadley. I think they're only keeping Asia around because she's young and cute.

  5. 5
    April
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 7:00 pm

    Top three are Brianna, Jordyn and Madison with Hadley and Zack after them, then Lexine.

    Asia or Amanda are going home next week is my prediction.

    Turn out is very important as well as sickle or club foot, It is just basic technique such as your toe needs to be pointed properly turned into your leg. Just google ballerina pictures and you can see what it should look like. Very precise. Toes pointed, hips turned out. It sticks out more when you see someone doing it right next to someone doing it wrong. The proper one is going to look way better. It is about forming nice lines with your body. Sorry if I can’t explain it better than that. Like when you point your toe you don’t just point with your feet. You point with your entire leg to create that lovely line.

    I am definitely impressed with Jordyn for being so good at hip hop at such a young age. I also kinda like the crimped hair. I did my hair like that when I was her age and I had the same blonde hair so maybe it makes me reminisce. Brianna is my favorite to win right now. I was also bullied in school so I want a victory for us picked on ones! I also love Gingers.

    I am so glad you pointed out the neck skin thing on Yvette. I was just like OMG when I was looking at it! Yikes! That woman is the devil. I was almost hating on Hadley because her mother was so terrible, but after she actually stood up to her mother I am a Hadley fan now. Just not a Yvette fan.

    Lexine and Hadely had the best dance on this episode.

  6. 6
    Lilly219
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 7:20 pm

    Ok a little off topic but does anyone have any info on what is going on with dance moms , there was a blow up on twitter , Abby is claiming the moms r holding up production bc they want more money ??? The same moms who claimed they did not get paid !! For season one maybe !

  7. 7
    Dani
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 8:44 pm

    @Lilly219– Well, all I know is what I’ve heard on twitter mostly. I know the girls didn’t attend last week’s competition and she brought in 4 new girls to replace them. I doubt the girls are staying though. One of the girls is Sophia Lucia, who is absolutely amazing and could (literally) dance circles around all of these girls. Sophia lives in San Diego though and I seriously doubt she would come out here as she is quite well-known already. She is amazing though, and I will look forward to watching her dance, but I’m quite certain it will only be for one episode. I’m thinking Abby’s trying to show the girls that “everyone’s replaceable.” I have no idea what the “fight” is about, or what’s holding up production, but I wouldn’t just assume it’s money. It could be so many things!!

    As far as the moms claiming they weren’t getting paid… I don’t know if they actually said that, but DID say that the girls weren’t getting paid. Maybe the moms did say that..? I don’t know, but if so, I’m sure it was in season one. I cannot see them doing this for no pay at this point. I’m sure they are probably being paid pretty well at this point and hopefully they are being smart about it and know that this will be short-lived and to put that money away for college, or whatever it is they may need for the future.

  8. 8
    Dani
    Posted October 25, 2012 at 8:48 pm

    Also, I don’t think it will be a permanent thing that the girls will stay gone. There are too many fans out there that tune in just to see THOSE girls dance each week. I know I do, and I won’t watch if they end up being replaced. (I’ll just watch the one episode with Sophia Lucia to watch her dance, but that’s it..). I think this show has worked a lot because of the relationships that the girls have with eachother and with their moms- you can feel the bonds they have with one another and it’s great to watch. They can’t just pick out 4 or 5 “new” dancers and replicate what these girls have. Aside from Kendall, they have all been together since they were 2 or 3 years old, and you can tell they all really love eachother.

  9. 9
    Lilly219
    Posted October 26, 2012 at 12:34 am

    Yeah I’m not sure where i read it but I believe it was a q&a with christi maybe? Who said the moms don’t get paid . The girls on the other hand cannot get paid bc then they would be considered “professionals” and wouldn’t be allowed to compete at the competitions . The whole money thing I read in one of abbys tweets she was getting a lot of hate & responded to a fan that it is the moms being greedy , that they wanted more money . Something along those lines . Also someone commented on last weeks recap about no more Brooke and Paige ? Which I doubt is true . I can see Brooke maybe wanting to drift away being in highschool and all but still I’m sure they’ll be back . It’s probably all for drama , at least some of it

  10. 10
    marie
    Posted October 26, 2012 at 2:36 am

    It looks to me like Brianna is fake crying just for sympathy, no tears that I can see.

  11. 11
    Dani
    Posted October 26, 2012 at 10:01 am

    @marie– I totally disagree! I think Brianna’s tears were real. Now I would think that about Elisabeth, as she seemed to be totally using her parents divorce as a reason for not doing her dance well, and she was very whiney and seemed like crocodile tears to me, but when I saw Brianna (who, by the way, has shown the least amount of drama so far, as well as her mother..) get emotional, I totally felt it and just the way she was breathing and choking up- it seemed very real to me. Brianna does not seem like an attention seeker at all. I actually have a feeling she may be the one to take the whole thing- she is amazing. I think it will come down to her and Madison is my prediction, but who knows..

  12. 12
    April
    Posted October 26, 2012 at 11:15 am

    I believe Brianna was really crying.

  13. 13
    Gwen
    Posted October 27, 2012 at 3:45 pm

    @Dani I LOVE SOPHIA LUCIA. Anyone who has not heard of her, look her up on YouTube NOW.

  14. 14
    Gwen
    Posted October 28, 2012 at 4:52 pm

    Melissa just tweeted this. It’s the girls at a competition with Sophia. http://instagram.com/p/RV01cMmWWi/

  15. 15
    lindsayyyy
    Posted October 31, 2012 at 6:12 am

    Jordyn is my fave, but only because of this “battle” video – she is incredible at hip hop! I can’t get over how young she is and how much (gulp) ‘swag’ she has. Must watch this!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PX2ysOz7eLU

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