“Who is this old lady?”
Robin references Cyd Charisse doing fan kicks in Singing In the Rain in heels, but I’m still not sold. Please discuss the relevance of heels in the comments below.
Hadley and Amanda are up next with their 50s swing dance.
“Look, she put a ring on it!”
They start off separated, and I immediately worry because when I think swing dancing, I think of actually working with your partner. Luckily, they quickly come together, and they are actually cute as a team. Unfortunately, I feel that they could have done more moves together. Abby thinks the choreo was perfect and she loves period pieces.
Abby tells Hadley to fix that fucked up flexing front hoof. Richy loves the poster of himself, ugh, fuck off. He praises Hadley, and then Robin says absolutely nothing of substance with even less of a basis to say it. Then she disses Hadley for being worse than Amanda, which makes even the soulless cry.
Good thing she’s wearing her acid-proof mascara.
Maria is backstage going all tiger mom on Lexine backstage, and she’s stressing her the fuck out. Maria said that Lexine is the one who has to accommodate for Chipette, which makes me think perhaps Lexine is going to drop the ball and let the rodent outshine her.
“Girls just want to have fun! Can’t you tell by my claws?!?”
Maria goes so far as to threaten Lexine with packing their shit to leave, and then even telling her that they are leaving since Lexine is such an awful disgrace of a daughter who will not mind her mother’s direction. Damn, girl, have a Xanax. Maria makes the girls hold hands and pray backstage. Oh that’s cute.
Chipette and Lexine’s 80s pop duet finally begins. They start off looking pretty cute, and at least their outfits are 80s.
Lookin good, Asia!
Together, they look so sloppy, it almost hurts. And Lexine had this beat of hesitation that was truly cringe-worthy.
Maybe they can at least cross their legs synchronized.
Abby doesn’t even bother to clap. She can’t look at Asia’s knees, lazy moves, or any of the other shit except her face. Richy agrees with Abby, and tells Lexine that she’s a breath of fresh air. He says she needs to step up her face game. The Undead Antin says that Asia keeps improving and proving us wrong. Ugh. YOU DON’T JUST DANCE WITH YOUR FACE, PEOPLE. That little nut-gatherer better go home.
Now it’s Madison’s turn with her 60s gogo dancing number. I really don’t have much to say about this solo, other than. . . it felt 60s. It was just kind of boring. I think she could have brought a lot more fun and attitude to it.