Amazing Race Recap: Friendships U-Turned

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By Fran and Berry | Wednesday, November 28, 2012 | 11:00 am | 7 Comments
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While the girls run to Phil, Dong has to get moving. Jaymes quickly reads the instructions, “Make your way on foot to the dock at Herring Market, take a boat to Majerboot and find the Poffertjesboot.” Did they forget to have Phil set this one up? Or are they cutting back on Phil’s hours so they don’t have to pay his benefits? Lame AR! That’s like how on Project Runway the designers have to stop themselves at the end of the day. Wake Tim Gunn up and have him kick them out! He can wear his pajamas and sleeping cap!

Choke Out is on a shuttle still transferring planes. Abbie’s all, “I’m over it right now.” She’s either said this thirty times or they keep replaying the sound bite. Either way, I’m over her saying that she’s over it.

FNL is landed in Amsterdam and is on the train. Dong is on their boat enjoying the view and the “calm before the storm.”

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Emmy award winning translation team.

Twin N’s check in and are first and win five thousand dollars each! Cash prizes are the best aren’t they? You can’t put a price tag on that.

Dong eats the food boat food off of the Poffertjesboot and gets their next clue. Detour time! Teams chose between two cultural gems that are treasured by the Dutch. Back in Time or Organ Grind. In Back in Time, Phil is in a museum and he whispers instructions something about how they have to recreate a Rembrandt paining by posing actors in costumes. But who will play Rembrandt’s mistress? And what did Rembrandt paint her doing?! In Organ Grind, they grind an organ and collect tips. When they earn 30 euros they’ll get their next clue.

Dong wants to grind their organ. Also, they chose the organ grind detour. Dong seems to be having a hard time getting tips. That’s weird. So they do what God made them to do…strip! They strip off their tops and put on their bow ties and cuffs (AKA, “Cuffs and collars”) and you better believe that gets the crowd going! The men of Amsterdam are into it. Probably searching out new talent for their red light district shows.

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“Oh ya! We liken de dongs!”

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“I’m taking a video to send to my boyfriend. THIS is what I mean by “sexy” Alfons.”

They are getting into their groove then a grandma comes by with her grandkids and pays them to stop. They get their 30 euros, now they can Proceed to Museum Geelvinck.

Choke Out lands in Amsterdam followed by Goat Boys. Goat Boys and Choke Out? Will they reunite? Will Goat Choke rise from the ashes?!

Dong gets to the museum and finds the U-Turn. They don’t want to U-Turn Choke Out! But they do! They have go to Ransdorp and search a field for their next clue. They think Ryan and Abbie are going to hate them, and they’re probably right. But to be fair, I bet it doesn’t take much to get Abbie and Ryan to hate you. So now Team Dong is onto the Roadblock. AR brings back a classic, swamp vaulting! We remember this from seasons past! You have to pole vault over a mud river. Yeah bring it! These guys haven’t gotten messy in a while. (Well, except Twin N’s who always manage to be covered in fish.) Dong James vaults easily and they advance. He probably has good balance.

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Fran and Berry are not just a sexy elderly couple who competed in Season 9 of the Amazing Race, they are also us, Mike Betette and Amanda Ohly.  We are similarly married and similarly carry backpacks all over the world.  Some people ask us "how do you keep the spark alive in your marriage?"  And to that we respond: reality tv.  Tons of reality tv.  Sexy, fighty, douchey reality tv.  We are both comedians living in Los Angeles and we love Robin Hood and we did NOT contribute to the Harlem Shake.  Google us for more, ya dirty stalker!

7 Comments

  1. 1
    sphouch
    Posted November 28, 2012 at 11:57 am

    The thing that I noticed with this episode was how duplicitous choke out was being. They are sitting there on camera in the interview portions mentioning how they’re going to U-turn their “friends” the goat boys so that they can stay in the race, while pretending to be happy that they have a team to work with together, and then they have the gall to bitch about how the Long Ducks “stabbed them in the back.” Bad form. Very bad form. To say nothing of the fact that the reason they were in a position to be eliminated in the first place is because they chose the wrong flight on two separate occasions, not because the Long Ducks U-turned them.

    I’m glad to see them gone.

  2. 2
    blazergirl
    Posted November 28, 2012 at 12:25 pm

    I have to say the Chippendale’s have grown on me through out the season. I think it’s sweet that they want to win to support their parents. They seemed genuinely concerned about the U Turn and upsetting Ryan and Abbie, but I’m glad they ultimately went with what would help them win. Team Dong for the win!

  3. 3
    Flippy Floppy
    Posted November 28, 2012 at 12:37 pm

    First of all, Frarry or Bran- how did you figure out which one was Jaymes and which one was James?

    I wonder if Abbie and Ryan remember running past the girl with no legs in the first week after that same girl told them where the clue was. Assholes. I’m glad they’re gone. That poor gate agent they were yelling at, too- in what universe can you get on a plane IF YOU DON’T check in??!! “Two million U.S.!” STFU, dude. And how do they blame their entire elimination on Team Dong, but fail to mention their failure to check in to flight number one, and the technical difficulties with flight number two, AND the fact that FNL cock-blocked them out of using a U-Turn on Goat Boys- which would have been bullshit- but they would have done it because they are complete assholes.

    Can you tell that I am happy Abbie and Ryan are gone?

    Team Dong all the way. I might even have a t-shirt made.

  4. 4
    pretty good year
    Posted November 28, 2012 at 2:30 pm

    Jaymes is the gay one. I wish the show would mention that, actually. He’s openly gay and there are a lot of Vegas-based articles and interviews about it, and I like that there’s such an “alpha male” gay guy on a show that often plays to stereotypes.

    Also, he’s blond and has a Southern accent.

    James is the other one.

    They’re definitely my favorite team this season. Very likable.

  5. 5
    lindaw205
    Posted November 29, 2012 at 3:47 am

    I’m Team Chippies all the way. I love their attitudes, especially Jaymes.

    I was glad to see Abbie and Ryan go and hope the Beekman’s are next. I would hate to see them back into a win after the other teams have worked so hard for it. Well, I think I would be okay with any of the remaining teams but have my fingers crossed for the J/J.

  6. 6
    Mister_Dangerous
    Posted November 29, 2012 at 9:49 am

    On October 4th I said I was rootin for Jaymes and James. I said it was because I liked smart teams.
    In retrospect I should have said it was because I liked nice guys.

    In the end I didn’t mind Ryan and Abby and I was able to differentiate them from Trey and Lexi.

  7. 7
    Kyrrie
    Posted December 1, 2012 at 8:34 pm

    I just couldn’t like Abbie and Ryan. Every time they did something likeable, they did something annoying and nasty. So, pleased they have gone. The Chippendales are gorgeous, I do hope they win.

    If Goat Boys win, they will have definitely done a Bradbury

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