Amazing Race Recap: Get your scrub on!

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By Fran and Berry | Tuesday, November 6, 2012 | 10:00 am | 11 Comments
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Meanwhile at the scrub down teams are getting an intense deep massage. That’s what I need. Ever since I had my baby, Lil C I’ve got all of this extra skin! FNL is done first. Teams must now make their way on foot to Kapali Carsi and search for the marked fountain in the bazar.

Team Dong is getting bathed and are startled by the cold water. Ja(y?)mes is all “I need just all of Bangladesh off me.”

201211060012

 

FLASHDANCE!

Goat Boys are wandering with the simit on Brent’s head. Nothing like lovers bickering in a foreign country, slowly through the streets. Well, they’re still ahead of Truckasaurus. For now.

Another Life of Pi moment with Gary and Mallory! Team White Daddy Issues! Mallory looks weird. Did she loose a ton of weight or did she get work done? Shoot! Maybe I should get some work done, at least get all this baby skin removed. I wonder if she can refer me.

#Roadblock! Serve Turkish sherbet. (So that’s why Truckasaurus was dressed that way in the confessional.) Teams have to dress up like Aladdin, carry a big ass brass dispenser and serve liquid sherbet. Lexi looks pretty damn cute in her outfit. Ryan from Choke Out and Abba not so much. Choke Out Ryan keeps dropping his dispenser lid while FNL Lexi seems to be excelling. She attributes it to being a loud and obnoxious cheerleader. She even got a guy to pay her to leave him alone. She truly is a sales person. Then Choke Out Ryan teams up with a local to pimp out his juice.

201211060015

 

“Please don’t tell my wife I took liquid from a white woman.”

Team Dong is still really making a big deal about those baths being cold. Shrinkage anyone?

Goat Boys make their first delivery. Truckasauras is right on their heels.

Twin N’s are ready to start sherbet slinging. Natalie is going to do it because she is single. Not sure what Nadiya thinks serving sherbet means but I’d like to see her demonstrate. “Get your sexy on Natalie!”

FNL Lexi is done. Twin Nadiya says loudly that she is glad that FNL is ahead of Choke Out. Abbie from Team Choke Out must have heard her because she gives her a death by choke out glare that is punctuated by some Emmy award winning music stings. FNL is on their way to the next pit stop at a ship called the Savarona. Phil is waiting for them wearing a crispy looking coral blouse. Cute.

Choke Out is on their way to the pit stop bitching about Twin N’s. And Mama Mia is Phil-ward bound. Meanwhile Goat Boys and Truckasaurus finish the simit delivery.

Drumrole…..FNL is team number one! They won a trip to Austraila! Choke Out is second.

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“Wearing this costume is completely demoralizing. There’s not even a bow tie!”

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Fran and Berry are not just a sexy elderly couple who competed in Season 9 of the Amazing Race, they are also us, Mike Betette and Amanda Ohly.  We are similarly married and similarly carry backpacks all over the world.  Some people ask us "how do you keep the spark alive in your marriage?"  And to that we respond: reality tv.  Tons of reality tv.  Sexy, fighty, douchey reality tv.  We are both comedians living in Los Angeles and we love Robin Hood and we did NOT contribute to the Harlem Shake.  Google us for more, ya dirty stalker!

11 Comments

  1. 1
    KJN KJN
    Posted November 6, 2012 at 10:32 am

    Soooo glad team Truckasaurus is gone! Ugly Americans (well, him anyway). Screaming at people that live in terrible circumstances that they are responsible for them losing a million dollars. People that probably can’t even comprehend the idea of a million dollars. Besides, you’re responsible for that, you big, fat doucher!

    I sure wish Twin N’s and FNL hadn’t taken Team Abba’s money. While it may not have been against game rules, it was all kinds of awful watching a “rock star” and a lawyer(!) beg for money in such a poor country. I don’t blame them for doing what they had to do to stay in the game, but it was a pretty unfortunate thing to see.

  2. 2
    featherhead
    Posted November 6, 2012 at 11:50 am

    I was watching last year’s season of RHoBH and the ladies went to Chippendales and James (with the dark hair) was on camera. I was looking for the other half of team dong but couldn’t find him.

    I thought the Twinnies should have been penilized for taking the money they found. They knew who’s it was.
    Still mad about the goat boys!!

  3. 3
    Mummy Butterfly
    Posted November 6, 2012 at 11:50 am

    I have to believe that the “begging” for money for Team Abba was taken care of by the producers. Does anyone remember when the last place team use to lose all their money? Then one season, it happened in an ultra-poor country, and the other teams ended up leaving money for the last place team for just this reason? (So the “rich Americans” wouldn’t be begging in a poor country.) I can’t for the life of me remember the season, but since then – in general on non-elimination legs, they added speed bumps and don’t take the cash. I can’t imagine (nor do I really blame the producers) that this wasn’t staged.

    In fact, as an American, I kinda hope it was. Very sad at Twin N’s. I had held out hope that Trey would convinced Lexi to return at least their half of the money. Glad to see Truckasaurus is gone! :D

  4. 4
    Mister_Dangerous
    Posted November 6, 2012 at 12:22 pm

    See, the reason why I liked Truckasaurus is because they were very blue collar/working class.

    The other teams: The bland whites (\Choke it out\ and \FNL\) along with ABBA and the GOAT BOYS are very savvy about how they want to be portrayed on TV and act accordingly.

    With Truckasaurus: what you saw was what they were. I’m not saying they were perfect but they weren’t phony or fake like the bland white teams.

    The Twin Ns are the most like Truckasaurus. They seem very \common\ and don’t have the social grace that comes from living amongst the middle class.

    Jaymes and James TEAM DELICIOUS (Dong) are working class but they’re entertainers first and foremost.

    My pick for the final three would be Goat Boys, TEAM DELICIOUS (dong) and the Twin Ns.

  5. 5
    Miss Molly
    Posted November 6, 2012 at 3:15 pm

    The twins are saprobic.

  6. 6
    Chicken Lips
    Posted November 6, 2012 at 5:36 pm

    Boy, and I thought I didn’t like Twinnies before – now I really hate them! I mean, seriously – you find money on the street with no one around, finders keepers. You find money on the street with people around, you at least look around to see if someone looks like they are doing something where they could have dropped it and you say, “hey, this yours?”. You find money in a room full of people that you know and that you know would have that much money on them – you say “Hey, who dropped their money?” Bitches! I was pissed that they didn’t get a penalty. I hope that kharma was watching so it can bitch slap the ever lovin’ snot out of those two whiny loud rude obnoxious bitches.

  7. 7
    JimbobJones
    Posted November 6, 2012 at 9:42 pm

    @Chicken Lips — Totally agree. I actually liked them before. I found them a bit annoying, but felt their hearts were in the right place. But to take money when you know whose it is? That’s scummy.

    What now? Is it “good play” for teams to steal stuff out of other backpacks or to flatten the tires of the rest of the cars when they have to drive?

    It’s astounding how much I can’t STAND them now.

  8. 8
    msjacqmills
    Posted November 7, 2012 at 7:29 am

    I’m with you Chicken Lips and JimbobJones. I’m waiting for some sweet kharma to kick them in the ass. Hopefully they lose their passports or their cab gets a flat and knocks them out of the game.

  9. 9
    Pegalicious
    Posted November 7, 2012 at 9:04 am

    Ditto, Chicken Lips, JimbobJones, msjacqmills. I couldn’t believe they’d just pick up the $$ and not let Mama Mia know they’d found it.

    Not sorry to see Truckasaurus go. Preview implied Mama Mia has problems again next week; hoping it’s totally misleading (as TAR seems wont to do).

  10. 10
    Chris Velazquez
    Posted November 7, 2012 at 12:02 pm

    I’m not happy at TwiNNies for what they did, but at the same time, I find it hard to judge them if I had been in the same situation. James & Abba really need to keep an eye on their things, first this with the money and now next episode looks like their cab takes off with their things.

    I guess TwiNNies got no penalty because Mama Mia dropped their money and the girls found it, it’s not like the girls opened the guys’ fanny pack and took the money from it. Not their obligation to give back the money they found either. Not happy with it, but at least I still think they’re not as bad as those Choke Out douchetards.

  11. 11
    CattyFan cattyfan
    Posted November 8, 2012 at 3:37 pm

    Hate the Twins, and theft is NEVER right…even in a game. If you have to cheat to win, it isn’t really winning.

    Didn’t mind the Truckasaurus team. Would rather they stayed than the mean-spirited twins and the other team that split the money with them.

    Previews show Team ABBA now loses their passports. I think they are distracted because of the bad news they received about their dad.

    What is the point of these Mickey Mouse speedbumps? Eat some ice cream…combine some soup ingredients…sit in a sauna bus. What a bunch of crap.

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