Jaymes and James: Chippendale dancers in Las Vegas! Close your eyes Lil’ C, mommy’s pulling out her singles! I wonder if Phil will be obviously threatened by them. Probably not unless one of them wears a shark tooth necklace, then it’s ON! Wait, wait, Chippendales wear jeans now? Since when did they get all casual? Fran is NOT amused.
Rob and Kelley: Hey, they look kinda like us! Except Rob has more hair. And so does Kelly. Married monster truckers from Georgia. I wonder which one of them is afraid of water and which one is afraid of heights. I think it’s Rob for both.
They are about travel to nine countries, 25,000 miles. Well, a lot of them won’t be. Phil reminds them that he’ll be eliminating most of them, but if they are the first to cross the finish line they have a chance to DOUBLE THEIR MONEY! WHOA! They gave us the chance to double our babies at the hospital too and take both twins home, but we thought one was plenty. We’re not greedy.
Get ready for the Phil-ride of your life!
Here’s how the money doubling works. You have to win the first and the last leg of the race. Um, so the suspense for the whole season if they are going to double their money ends as soon as the team that wins the first leg is eliminated? Let’s hope that happens in episode two so we can stop thinking about it.
AND NOW…let’s get to some Emmy winning action with a 10 story repel off a bridge and promote some all new Ford Escapes! HEYYY! I bet one of them Ford Escapes would be PERFECT to carry a baby in. Safe and fuel efficient too! Please, please, if anyone reading this knows anyone who works at Ford Escape HQ, please send them this. We need a car! Pulling our baby everywhere in a wagon is getting embarrassing. Because it’s also her bed!
Turns out it’s Caitlin and Brittany who are both scared of heights. In their defense, most seasons of AR nobody ever has to jump off anything. Or be in water. Or eat anything weird or be around animals. Oh wait, I’m thinking of Jeopardy. What game show is this?
“If I don’t survive The Amazing Race. Mom, I want you to have my eyelash curler.”
I can’t tell which is Jaymes and which is James based on their personalities since they’re both Chippendales dancers. I assume they’d both be named Jaymes. Or Vance.
The graphic for Amy and Daniel says “Dating on and off.” It should say “Incredibly strong woman and this other guy.” Gary and Will are also scared of heights. I guess they hoped they would be eliminated before they got to any heights tasks. Thank God we didn’t bet our wrapping paper diaper budget on them.