American Horror Story Asylum Recap: Pregnancy: the Cruelest STD

At this point, we know Thredson ultimately had a son, but is Lana the mother? Sister Mary Eunice confirms to Lana that she is pregnant and that no amount of Obamacare forced upon the Catholic Church in 1964 will allow her to become un-pregnant. Sandra Fluke, be damned. It’s a steadfast devotion to the pro-life movement when the nun forces the institutionalized lesbian to carry a baby to term. I swear I saw this exact same scenario on “Maury” once.

Lana tells Kit its time to take out Thredson, but Kit hesitates, knowing that his freedom lies only in a confession from the deranged killer. Lana visits Thredson in the utility closet in which she has him bound and gagged, and delivers the news of her pregnancy.

Only a few weeks pregnant, and Lana is already using tables to hide it.  Classic television diversion. 

What ever happened to formal baby announcements? Just because we are in an asylum doesn’t mean we should forego our manners.

Thredson doesn’t take too kindly to Lana’s proclamation that while she is pregnant, she doesn’t plan on staying that way for long. Lana, doing what all crafty lesbian news reporter women in 1964 would do, fashions a poking device out of a coat hanger in an attempt to rid herself of Bloody Face’s offspring. It doesn’t work. Nor does keeping Dr. Thredson bound in the closet, as when Lana returns later, she discovers that he has been freed- freed to rape and pillage and make masks out of human skin and, even worse, make sequels to that horrible “Star Trek” movie (sorry, Zachary Quinto).