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Sunday, May 13, 2012
1:09 am
9 Comments
The Black team wins! Ugh – Chaz does a namaste prayer bow (dude – way to misappropriate a sacred ritual) and Cheven bro’s out.
Cheven is further insulted when Chaz is awarded Chef of the Week or some such title. I think the Chev makes some sort of meaningless threat at this point as well. Oh thank Heaven for Cheven 11, amirite?
The Red Team is chastised. Even though Nookie did it all for the nookie, his pie sucked. He decides to pile on poor Clara, proclaiming her to be the weakest link, even though her dish was not one of those called out.
Girl, you got played by someone named Nookie. For shame!
Clara was the one who insisted Big Ben was the Tower of London, so I don’t feel too bad for the girl. And sure enough Clara is kicked to the curb. Later skater! Gary cries. Of course he does.
Next stop: Lyons, France! See you next week!
Thanks for reading you guys. PLEASE leave comments, questions, prayers, anything! Really appreciate feedback!
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9 Comments
LOL at “Minnie Mouse Realness”… I’d prefer to fuck an apple pie than that Sai chick… and something tells me all the mirrors in her house have a slight vertical-running concavity to them… it’s the only way I can think of to explain her being so convinced of her hotness.
Just want to point out that Chaz Brown (or Chazzy as I liked to call him for the short time I saw him) is a reject from last season’s Top Chef Texas (http://www.tvgasm.com/recaps/top-chef-recap-the-bubble-bursts.html) who didn’t make it onto the show because he couldn’t get his risotto plated in time. EMBARRASSING!
love, J-Mo
Towards the end of the show, during their little confessional interviews, I could not get over how big “Cheven” nostrils are…they were totally distracting.
Omg!! I didn’t even watch this episode and this was a hilarious read. Ah yes, I agree with the 56895325 shows about cooking that are now on tv. I love Nigella. Love.Her. This show does have an interesting concept and I love The Amazing Race as well, so after reading your review I’m going to start watching. Chaz sounds like trouble for sure. Anyone that doesn’t know the difference between Big Ben and Tower of London when you are actually IN London scares me.
P.S. I was sad Ringer wasn’t coming back, but now that I know you are writing these reviews all is good again!
Oh J-Mo, so nice to have you as the “insider” for this show. Now all we need is a wacko chef to defend, um, something. We could get upwards of a dozen comments.
Just think!
Missed the show, too, but thanks to your recap foggy, I’m listing it as a fave.
Did anyone else get the feeling that the teams get swapped at some point during the season, based on the clips they showed? I actually like this show, mainly because it is a mashup of Survivor, the Amazing Race, and Top Chef. I don’t know what to make of the cast so far, but as the show moves along, I think the show will get better. I’ll be along for the ride for the rest of the season.
Loved your recap! I wasn’t going to watch this show, but now I will so I can follow along with your recaps! I don’t even pretend to cook so I can’t explain why I enjoy so many of the competition cooking shows. I like the premise of this one though.
That’s Cat’s partner? They look like sisters. I want two mommies too!
Cat Cora is MILFalicious! (I want two mommies too. But perhaps not in the way others were thinking.)
Fucking Chaz. If you want to do yoga, good for you. It’s not a fuckin’ way of life. Keep your humble, respectful, showy little bows to yourself, yogasshole. Say “namaste” to me and I swear I’ll make one of your eyeballs leak.
Foggy!! Thanks for the great first recap of this show. I am intrigued by this show, love Cat Cora and Curtis Stone as hosts. Done the nice comment thang, now time to snark…
Chefs I am getting DIAF vibes on already: Cheven: (really, dude? You made your renaming a concept, did you? How does chedouche sound?), Nookie: another reason to absolutely loathe the Red Sox. I was hoping for a collapse in the streets (something that the Red Sox are familiar with…bada bing!) . And cramming food and drink like that while you are running through the streets seems to a recipe (get it?) for upchucking. That said, the blood sausage dish and Pimm’s Cup looked good to me. I don’t know why quaffing a beer down took precedence over knowing what a steak and kidney pie tasted like. I put that solely at the feet of the Nookie!
I don’t dislike the Chazz yet. He took charge of the kitchen, so I would tell the others to quit their bitching! Somebody had to do it, and I thought it was hilarious how huffy they got about it. Don’t some of them work in restaurant kitchens?
Well, I look forward to the show and the recaps!
Cat Cora and her partner look so alike. For a minute, I was trying to figure out if someone had photoshopped two different pictures of her into one. I feel bad for her though because I feel like if the ground opened up and swallowed her in the middle of filming, nobody would have noticed. It’s pretty much the Curtis Stone show, which I don’t mind because he is like a sexual eucalyptus tree. I want to be the koala living in his branches.
Cheven is such a pathetic loser. He should just admit it and get help for his condition, instead of pretending to be some badass. The look on his face when Chaz took credit for his bread pudding idea had me rolling. He looked like a flamingo in the headlights of a Mack truck.
And the chefs on the red team are the stupidest group of idiots I have ever seen. I like them more because all the assholes seem to have congregated on the black team, but they are dumb. Why did they let Nookie play them like that? I don’t feel that bad for Clara though because she is also stupid. Why talk to Nookie? Why not talk to that skinny asian girl (don’t even remember her name)? It would be like talking to a tree…nobody would ever know what she said. But no, she went and talked to a blimp, who of course broadcasted her shit all over the place.
P.S. I love Sweet Genius. It doesn’t make any sense, but that is my show. And it’s a good way to end a terrible date. Just take your date’s hand, look longingly into his/her eyes, and smile just like Ron Ben-Israel while saying, “You belong in my world of desserts”.