Bad Girls Club Recap: Barrrrrf

They all head out to Happy Ending for some beer pong. Tasha takes the opportunity to talk to J-Bloat and try to clear shit up. J-Bloat tells her she was mad because Tasha said Erica made her hate her and as she’s already told us no one makes her feel anything. She was insulted. They both decide it’s a clean slate. Yay.

Back at home Rima calls Ricky and he tells her his friend is interested in J-Bloat. They are gonna come over later. Rima tells J-Bloat that this dude is all hot for her and she tells us that although she never looked at him that way before now he’s hot. That’s all it takes huh?

 By the way the dudes name is “Durkee”. Fallen says some shit about taking a nap and J-Bloat asks her what’s wrong. She says nothing. J-Bloat asks her if she wants to snuggle. She laughs. Fallen tells us that she is confused by her feelings for J-Bloat because she isn’t in to girls………I give up. They then go back and forth about spooning and J-Bloat says Fallen hasn’t spooned her in two nights and so she’s gonna spoon Blondie, Fallen yells back that she will then spoon with Rima. I’m about to spoon a bullet.

Later Ricky and Durkee arrive and Rima basically tackles Ricky. She tells us it’s nice to have someone around whose worried about whether she’s happy or not. Needy much?

J-Bloat prepares a toast but before she can say anything Rima yells out, “To Julie and Brian(Durkee) having sex tonight.” J-Bloat replies something about Rima getting bent over and “railed” by Ricky. I’m not going to live through this episode. By the way J-Bloats plan is to fuck the shit out of this dude because it’s been at least 15 minutes since she got laid. My dramamine is wearing off.

Ricky tells Rima she needs to keep it real and stop playing games. She claims she’s isn’t and that he knew she had a boyfriend back home. He claims he knew she had an EX but not a NOW. She claims she has a “situation” with this person even though she considers herself single. He tells her that unless she has a child with this person there is no situation.

Looks like someone is unaware of Rima’s son.

Rima doesn’t mention her son but tells us Ricky brings up some good points and she has some thinking to do. Try not to hurt yourself.

Over to J-Bloat and Durkee, he asks her why she’s a bad girl. She says because she runs shit! He says you mean you run this house. Basically. She tells him it’s a gift. I would call it something else. J-Bloat is all excited because she and this dude both have the same sense of humor and they like to rash on people. She says most guys are intimidated by how much of a bitch she is but he gets her! Meanwhile Fallen is drunk, jealous and hating life. Off to Club Stinky Pinky they go.

Fallen is about to explode watching J-Bloat and Brian (Durkee) suck face and she doesn’t know what to do. Back at home I finally laugh for the first time this episode.

Ya just gotta love her.

Meanwhile Rima runs for the house and takes off her panties while on the run. J-Bloat and Brian follow behind. Once inside they head for the bed. J-Bloat and Brian that is. She tells us she is sexually frustrated and needs to get it in. She’s gonna fuck his brains out.

Meanwhile Rima is now whining to Blondie about her man situation. She doesn’t know what to do. Blondie tells her she knows what’s best for herself and Rima says, “No I don’t. I really don’t.” Wow a moment of clarity. It was bound to happen.

The next morning Rima calls Anthony to start a fight. He tells her he loves her and she tells him that after everything he’s put her through does he really think he’s the best thing for her. OMG shut up. He tells her that yes he is best for her and he wants to be there for his son to watch him grow up. She tells him she doesn’t know what she wants. Thanks for clearing that up bitch I was so fucking confused!

J-Bloat by the way is still sexually frustrated because after all that she still didn’t get any. They cuddled. She asks us if she looks like the type of girl who likes to cuddle?

Do I look like the type of girl who gives a shit?

Fallen missed her Julie and said she got taken away. J-Bloat explains that nothing happened because she likes aggressive guys and he’s just not. Oh fuck my monkey, Zuly surfaces and tells us that if J-Bloat wants to be loved right then, “Holla at ya girl.” I’m gonna need to puke again. After J-Bloat tells us that she likes to get hate fucked they all decide to go to the beach and get drunk.

Once there they soon get bored and start daring each other to dance up on people. Rima shakes her sweaty ass in a random dudes face and Blondie almost gives this dude a stroke.

Bad Blondie!

Rima sucks face with some dude  and J-Bloat pulls her top down and flops across the beach. Tasha is obviously drunk because she tells us that she has had the best time with these girls and is now beginning to feel like a part of this house. Until she said that I had forgotten she was there.