Bad Girls Club Recap: The Devil Wears Nada

Recaps

By Cherie | Wednesday, July 25, 2012 | 6:50 pm | 20 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Bad Girls Club, Recaps

The next day Erika is feeling much better and plans to feel a whole lot better. She has set up a tequila tasting for them all. Mobama and Falen are already hung over but they go anyway.

  Julie next goes to Erika and tells her she made up with Christina. Erika thinks this is a sign that Julie is learning and growing. Ha!

Julie then tells Erika that this might be a “powder in the pooch” day.

I would think every day is a powder in the pooch day for the BGC.

Erika explains that it is hot and you have to put powder in your panties so your vag don’t sweat. I can’t believe I just typed that.

Off to the tasting they go as one big happy sweaty pooched family! Seriously they all keep talking about sweating and laughing and Blondie is so happy that they love each other. I’m gonna get drunk just watching this shit.

It tastes like feeeeet!

Erika hops up and starts dancing and Julie keeps talking about how they are all “good” and getting along and happy happy happy!!!

Back at the house, Blondie is whining to Rima that she wants a real man. She wants to kiss a man. She tells Rima she kisses her all the time but it’s not the same she wants a man! Then they kiss. Mobama comes in and Blondie is all, “Dude your boobs look good.” She hasn’t seen them all “out” like that. Blondie asks if she can touch them. Mobama says sure. 

Guess there’s no dildo machine this season.

The next day comes and it’s Mobama’s 22nd birthday!!! Yay!!!

Mobama plans to go to the spa with her boos Julie and Falen, out to lunch and do something fun later that night. It’s gonna be the bestest birthday ever!

Rima and Blondie are going with them. Erika realizes this at the last moment and is pissed that she and Christina weren’t invited. Rima tells her she invited herself. They are about to leave so Erika says she needs a shower and can’t go. Someone says Rima didn’t shower and Erika says, “I ain’t like this bitch.”

The girls leave and Julie and Mobama’s plan starts to work. Erika wonders why they weren’t invited and Christina proclaims she’s more mad at Rima. They decide she isn’t the person they thought she was and the only decision they need to make is whether or not to fuck up Mobama’s birthday or be cool. Either way, Erika says the bitches fates are in their hands.

Over lunch, Rima and Blondie thank the others for letting them tag a long even though they invited themselves. Julie says now that they are all “cool” it’s stupid to keep hanging out in separate groups even if the others a a bit “salty” about it right now. Julie tells Rima to just talk to Erika and Christina about it and Rima says she doesn’t make excuses to anybody, she does what she wants. Julie digs a little deeper and asks if they think that Erika and Christina maybe don’t feel that things are “cool”. And they bond.

At the nail salon, Falen is amazed at how easy this has been. Julie agrees and says they are dumb as fuck. I have to agree. She also says they are evil scheming bitches. I agree with that too.

Back at home the bitterness is growing. Erika decides Rima is fake and phoney and is now a PAB.

It’s hard to take someone seriously when they look like Mini Mouse.

Upstairs they go to hide Rima’s wallet under the bed. That’s stupid and serious PAB behavior if you ask me. I hate when even I start to flip on people. Oh well.

Christina actually does the hiding because Erika doesn’t want Rima to touch her shit. She would have to fuck her up.

Back at the spa, the evil ones toast to their group OSRS. On Some Real Shit. Then they head home to some very unhappy bitches. Especially Erika who says they were left at home all day and no, she does not want to go out with them tonight. Finally they convince her to go and they all get dressed up in lingerie to go to The Pink Kitty and dance and get more drunk.

Most of them were mostly clad except for Rima who decided to wear a thong.

You’ll never see that thong again.

Rima tells us she feels tension from Erika but she’s not her Mom and she’s gonna do what she wants to do.

Off to Club Ho they go. Happiness and dancing and Mobama gets to blow out a big ass candle.

Happy Birthday Bitch!

Julie has now sensed the tension between Rima and Erika and she makes her move on Erika. She tells her she’s been wanting to talk to her and she tells her that the day Rima was drunk she told her that she, Rima, really wanted to be friends with them but that Erika had told her not to fuck with them. She tells Julie that what she said was not to be playing both sides. And she’s pissed. She claims she only told Rima not to be phony. And she and Julie HUG. I still don’t like her but damn, either she’s really good at this shit or Erika is seriously stupid. You choose.

Back at home they put candles on some cupcakes and say Happy Birthday again. Mobama is happy as a pig in shit because she had a great birthday and their plan is in action.

The tension keeps building and everyone goes to bed. The next morning Erika tells the girls to calm her down because she doesn’t want to go home. Julie plays all stupid and asks what’s wrong. Rima is clueless for a second and then Erika says people are talking shit.

You a phony!!!!

Rima is all, “Whaa?” Erika repeats herself and Rima wants to know who said what because someone is twisting her words. At first Erika says it doesn’t matter who said what and then she tells her it was Julie. Rima confronts Julie and says she never said that Erika told her not to fuck with them and Julie says she did when she was drunk!

Oh Dear, I didn’t mean to cause trouble.

Rima says hello, I was drunk, exactly! She doesn’t even remember saying that. Erika doesn’t care whether she was drunk or not.  It keeps getting worse and Erika starts to walk over to Rima and Rima tries to walk away and “be a bigger person.” Rima says she isn’t gonna bring Charlie out right now. While Julie and Mobama giggle, Erika jumps in Rima’s face and they start screaming.

bitchsluthoskankphonyfakekilldiebitchbitchbitch

And the show ends. So, what do we think of Miss Julie now? Or Mobama for that matter. Falen as usual just sat on the sidelines but those two are acting like real Bad Girls. I really don’t want to like either one of them so I’m not gonna.

Until next week,

Love and Smooches,

Cherie

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Cherie
About

Cherie's bio consists of being basically one of the few not inbred to live in the great state of Georgia. (She looks forward to your letters) She's married. Again. She's old enough to have good sense but just doesn't seem to yet. And she likes crappy shows where she can make fun of people more screwed up than her.

20 Comments

  1. 1
    Enrique's Mole
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 7:56 pm

    Damn it, who let Juli-saurus hatch a plan? And how are the other bitches dumb enough to believe a word that comes out of her Cheetoh-crusted mouth?! Hate!

  2. 2
    Cherie Cherie
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 9:10 pm

    LOL Juli-saurus!!! I know, I can’t stand her but damn, she’s working those bitches.

  3. 3
    cheergirl
    Posted July 25, 2012 at 9:32 pm

    I only like christina now. Falen is so irrelevant and I wish she would go home. I looked at the upcoming episodes’ descriptions and someone does go home and someone new comes in. I think I know who. Seems like they will be ganging up on Rima which I hate (last season was terrible b/c that’s all they did).

  4. 4
    jerseyj
    Posted July 26, 2012 at 5:58 am

    I have to say, I don’t like Julie and Mobama, but I was impressed by their scheming. They are controlling the whole house right now and the others are too stupid to realize it!

    So far I think the only one I really like is Blondie. She’s dumb as hell, but she’s entertaining and not a bitch.

    Is it just me or did they get a lot of big girls this season? Erika, Rima, Blondie and Julie should have formed a click and called themselves the chunky monkeys :p

    Also, since when is it acceptable behavior to pull your clothes off on top of a bar? I mean, I know that shit flies in Mexico, but Rima claims she does it in chicago too? Any bar I know would kick her cottage cheese ass out for that!

  5. 5
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted July 26, 2012 at 6:56 am

    I get a flash of the boobs every now and then but the whole pants on the ground thing confuses me. I mean aren’t there laws against that. (for the states at least)

  6. 6
    sandra
    Posted July 26, 2012 at 7:22 am

    Still Hate Julie but now hating Erica for being so stupid. They are too immature and have no business in Mexico. Idiots but I love to see them act like fools!

  7. 7
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted July 26, 2012 at 7:34 am

    It really doesn’t matter if you hit someone first. If you get your butt beat then you are the idiot that keeps going back in for more.

  8. 8
    yummy
    Posted July 26, 2012 at 11:00 am

    Agreed, classy drunk. Who brags about getting the first hit when it’s the only one they get and they walk away all battered and bruised??

    I disagree that Julie is “controlling” Erika. Erika was already annoyed with Rima. Maybe Julie sped it up, but I think this would have gone down either way because Rima is sloppy and crazy. And can the girls on this show please stop it with the “scheming to get this bitch out of the house” crap?? I really hate Lea and Kristen for starting this trend back in their season.

  9. 9
    labowner
    Posted July 26, 2012 at 5:28 pm

    Isn’t Rima the one with the kid and now we see she is insane? Hopefully DCFS is taking notes.

  10. 10
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted July 27, 2012 at 9:59 am

    Ok I just caught up on this season and I want no affiliation with that lame ass bitch Julie.

    But, I love how nutzo this crew is.

    I’m in!

  11. 11
    Cherie Cherie
    Posted July 29, 2012 at 5:25 am

    Man getting peeps to comment in summer is like getting my Mom In Law to like my food! So thanks to all who have read this crap and continue the torture that is Season 9 of BGC. Love to you all!!!!!!

  12. 12
    (J)ustPeachy (J)ustPeachy
    Posted July 29, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    Lol, Cherie. I just caught up, too. I haven’t even watched an episode. Every spare minute I have goes to Big Brother. Your recaps are more interesting, anyways. Try to get some shots of all these fights. I know that the camera angles suck and they flash stuff so fast, but I would like to see who is actually hitting who and how she got those bruises. You had me rolling with the Julie names, shoot, all the names. When I read the comment above, I was like, who’s Megan? lol

  13. 13
    fancyface
    Posted August 1, 2012 at 2:42 pm

    “Fuck you! I’ll Fuck a FIVE year old up!”

    Umm Cherie…do you watch this little gem called Mama Drama on VH1? If not…..GET ON THAT SHIT STAT!! And this is totally relevant because former bad girl Ashley & her mom (responsible for my opening quote in reference to some of the moms thinking that people of a certain age are off limits) is on the show…so there.

    It’s like the bad girls club, no it IS the bad girls club for mother-daughter duos..the craziest actually being a mother-daughter-daughter TRIO. I just randomly scheduled this show after reading the title, had 3 epis on my dvr, & got bored so I played catch up & OMG!! I can’t even explain how awesome it is. This is actually pretty sad because you have grown ass women who should know better by now but thank goodness for us that they don’t! Seriously…watch it! I’m hoping for a recap to capture this awesomeness.

  14. 14
    Cherie Cherie
    Posted August 1, 2012 at 4:26 pm

    @fancyface lolololol I will look the show up and see if there is a marathon on cause crazy bitches are right up my alley!!! For a second I thought you were quoting something I said and I was thinking maybe it’s time for me to get a lil therapy! How’d I miss this show??? Thanks again!!
    Loves!!!

  15. 15
    Heather
    Posted August 1, 2012 at 6:50 pm

    Erica is an embarrassment and she needs to go home. She needs to sit her ass down and chill out, my personal opinion you whip ass one good time they’ll stop

  16. 16
    Moli Moli
    Posted August 1, 2012 at 7:49 pm

    OMG, I just watched the 2nd and 3rd episodes of Mama Drama on VH1. I’m speechless! Whitney and Britney with a splash of Loren is a tad terrifying. BTW, I hate Erika…loved the recap as always Cherie.

  17. 17
    fancyface
    Posted August 1, 2012 at 10:34 pm

    @Cheri…Let me know if you need links to watch it online because this is MUST SEE TV! It’s like that show Crowned: The Mother of All Pageants, where it was a mother daughter pageant that was hosted by Carson Kressley & that chick that was married to Travis Barker…but this show has 5 pairs of mothers & daughters that were like that crunk black duo that ran out after they were eliminated before their sashes could be cut. You know the show I’m talking about or was I only one watching that shit? If you haven’t seen that one either I suggest you do because that was some bat shit craziness too!

    @Moli…ditto on the speechless! I watched the 1st episode with my mouth open because I couldn’t believe I was watching a show about MOTHERS acting a fools with their 20 something daughters on national tv but I could NOT look away. Loren was a mess OUT THE GATE, so if you haven’t seen the 1st episode watch it IMMEDIATELY. (and what about her going off on her daughters for acting like her & even having the nerve to tell Whit she needed to be a better role model for HER daughter? Umm hello pot! have you met yourself? chile please!) I was hooked from the 1st scene but when Sharon said “Some of the mothers think that because someone is of a certain age they should be off limits” and then deadpanned to the camera “Fuck You! I’ll fuck up a 5yr old”….I fell in love! I mean, who says shit like that & why don’t I know people that do in real life? Because we could seriously be best friends lol. I literally can’t stop quoting her!

  18. 18
    Cherie Cherie
    Posted August 2, 2012 at 3:58 am

    @fancyface please send me the links. All I can find on VH1 is ep 5. I MUST see this show!!! I MUST!!!!!

  19. 19
    Cherie Cherie
    Posted August 2, 2012 at 3:59 am

    Oh sorry and thanks for the love @Moli. I love all my BGC bitches. And I mean that with love!!!!

  20. 20
    Moli Moli
    Posted August 2, 2012 at 4:25 am

    Fancyface do you have a link for the first episode? My mouth dropped open where I found out the twins occupation. Seriously you can talk the talk and in the next breath cry cause you can’t find your Mommy.

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