Oh wait. This is the launch party… hahaha… Three people, Homewrecker in glasses and she turns on her Mac and VOILA! Launched. I WAS just like mine.
2012 Mint Swim Launch Party!
She’s a successful business woman and she’s so happy that she is an independent woman… the ladies scroll through three ugly bathing suits and pop the champagne. Homewrecker Spice sends out a tweet and then it was time to talk about Old Spice.
It’s the day of Sister Spice’s tasting party. Scary Sister Spice is there and Homewrecker shows up with Opportunistic/Whore Spice. Opportunistic/Whore Spice is worried that the women might poison her. I’d be more worried about a shiv. But that’s me.
“Is that cornbread?” “No, it’s palenta.” “No, it’s cornbread to me.”
Cornbread? Have you no class? It’s ITALIAN cornbread. Whatevs. Pass me the chimichangas.
The music gets heavy, cut to Oldie walking up the driveway. Homewrecker Spice answers the door and Sister Spice hears “the voice” and she interviews that she doesn’t know what to do. So, she says hello, Oldie says hello, they all sit down and then BAM, we have Homewrecker wearing a dog collar/head piece that distracts me to the point of having the pause and rewind to hear what she said. The full episode isn’t available online yet, but I found her interview in a bonus clip, because, yes, it’s THAT important to me.
Wimpy stands up to toast that she invited Oldie because Oldie is in a different place in her life and that Oldie promised to apologize to all the ladies for the misunderstanding. (Oh no, it’s never a good sign with a woman who believes in unicorns and magic elves speaks on behalf of a menopausal, demented, transvestite… if I’ve seen it once, I’ve seen it a thousand times…)
Wimpy continues to say “Miss Jackie promised…” and Sister Spice interrupts with “to pick one personality?” Oh burn. Oldie stands there and smirks. And scene.
We see a montage of what the season holds for us, and it doesn’t appear that it will disappoint. As long as your expectations are low and your IQ is even lower. But I’m in… I’m always game for some mind-numbing TV and arguing among crazy people.
Please feel free to make any comments or suggestions as how to better recap this show. Let me know if you have ideas for better nicknames for the ladies and I hope you will stick with me throughout the season.
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