The grammar these ladies use just kills me. I’m all for a little dialect and style to your method of speech, but holy cow moly, these ladies just sound ignorant.
Homewrecker Spice and Opportunistic/Whore Spice are sitting down talking about Old Spice and Opportunistic/Whore Spice looks so nice. She’s dressed appropriately and has on nice make up and I just realized that I am liking her more and more. Sister Spice shows up with two hula hoops in her ears and I feel myself falling into a coma. (We’ll see this is a trend this episode.)
Oh good, more big hoops. Go big, or go home… I’ll go home.
Opportunistic/Whore Spice says she wasn’t too impressed with Old Spice’s sense of style, but she’s v diplomatic, until Homewrecker Spice informs her that Old Spice has her own clothing line. It baffles me too… I think Old Spice is an awful dresser. (I wonder if they have an Old Navy in LA… because they make some v comfy clothes at affordable prices.) I know I liked her last week, but I’m starting to find Sister Spice mind-numbing. Sister Spice and Homewrecker Spice continue to talk about whether or not Old Spice ever apologized. (SHE DID. Not well, but she did.) Maybe that braided wrap is squeezing Homewrecker Spice’s brain cells (or cell).
“I know everyone thinks I look adorbs in my headscarf.”
Ugh, now Sister Spice, Wimpy Spice and Homewrecker Spice are meeting to talk about Wimpy Spice’s “little jewelry line”, but really just to rehash the food tasting AGAIN… Wimpy Spice apologizes to Sister Spice for inviting Old Spice without asking, and I’m hoping that Sister Spice and Homewrecker Spice both realize that when she says “she apologizes”, that she’s saying “she’s sorry”… I know how confused these ladies get.
She’s in her happy place. Where unicorns fly and purple lipstick looks good.
Homewrecker Spice interviews that she does feel bad about prank calling Old Spice and because of some of the mean things they said to/about her. Sister Spice stands firm that she has no desire to make nice-nice with Old Spice.
Opportunistic/Whore Spice is getting all dolled up for a photo shoot for King Magazine. She looks so friggin cute without make-up on, I just wish they’d stop now, but they won’t, because they next thing I see is Opportunistic/Whore Spice with a massive Princess Leah bun on one side of her head while wearing something that Blanche Devereaux may have worn on Golden Girls. She interviews that the cover of the magazine is up for the taking and that she’s ready to bring it.
WTF? Stylist! Wardrobe! Hair! Is this a friggin’ joke right now?