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Old Spice and Doug are finalizing plans for their wedding and it gave me pause to think that they plan these weddings EVERY. SINGLE. YEAR. What a waste of time. And money. But I guess I’m grateful and I KNOW that the entire gay community is counting on this wedding to solve all the social injustices levied upon them. So, today is cake and venue day. They taste cakes and Old Spice interviews that she pretends to lets Doug make decisions, but that really she’s already made them all… and then I look at Doug and feel like he doesn’t give two shts about the wedding, he’s just excited to be eating cake.
I like lemon. I like men.
Old Spice asks him for his advice on whether he should invite the ladies to the wedding. He says that if it’s going to cause drama that she shouldn’t But we all know that’s exactly why she SHOULD AND WILL invite them. It’s a pointless conversation because there’s no way VH-1 would deprive us from faux gay wedding lady drama.
Cut to a quick scene with Sister Spice and Scary Sister Spice walking down the street talking about Sister Spice’s upcoming trip. She’s heading out of town for a while and Scary Sister Spice wants to throw a going away party for her. They find a spot to sit and talk about inviting Old Spice and Sister Spice says that Scary Sister Spice just calls Old Spice up when she needs a laugh. Sister Spice says that Old Spice is going to ask Scary Sister Spice to be the maid of honor, but Scary Sister Spice laughs it off and says she better not because she may not even go and if she goes, she’s bringin’ it. Scary Sister Spice says it’s getting weird and that “she has her own plans for Old Spice”. (Yes, @featherhead, I heard it too and am so excited.)
Maid of Honor? Not a chance.
Scary Sister Spice also mentions to Sister Spice that she told Gangsta Spice that she could rap and Sister Spice was like “ugh, don’t tell people that you can rap”. And I’m only recapping this because I love Scary Sister Spice, but she responds with her funny face and says, “What? I got flows for all these hoes. I kill.” Love. Her. Sorry.
Homewrecker Spice’s mom is dragging Homewrecker Spice to visit a psychic. Homewrecker Spice isn’t sure how psychics fit in with her religious beliefs, and I don’t know how “modeling” fits in with her religious beliefs either. But then again, I don’t know what her beliefs are, so I’ll assume that she makes it work for herself.
The psychic tells Homewrecker Spice that she puts a lot of pressure on herself and that’s she’s creative and focused. Homewrecker Spice is crying and doesn’t know how this lady was able to hit so close to home, and I want to whack Homewrecker Spice in the head with some sage and remind her that she was on TV for an entire season already, and maybe the lady just had a love of bad TV.