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Thursday, August 2, 2012
9:55 pm
31 Comments
The Vicious family is giant! I worry for the state of their couch! Dad is proud of Frank after all! Maybe their relationship is mended! The segment finally ends! Now we go to commercials, because this is apparently a three-hour episode!
Our 5thsexiest US male Olympian: Jake Dalton! Even though his face makes me nervous that he’s still in high school.
I may be in jail by the time you read this.
We’re back, and Julie eagerly clutches an envelope that contains the results of “America’s” “Vote”. She teases the houseguests for a second, before revealing that, yes, America did, in fact, vote to give the coaches a chance to enter the game. I die of a heart attack. I cannot believe this. This is the most shocking thing since we found out what was in the hatch on Lost (spoiler alert: it was holding five terrible seasons!).
Julie lays out the new rules: the coaches go one by one into the Diary Room, where there will be a button to “reset” the game. If just one coach hits the button, then all the coaches enter the game, there is NO eviction tonight, and everyone plays in the HoH competition. If no one hits it, then someone is eliminated, but past evictees will re-enter the game later. This is too complicated for people like @sarabear219 and @cherrygarcya to follow, I fear.
Our 4thsexiest US male Olympian: Ryan Lochte! America’s sweetheart! Voted “most kissable lips” by his high school class of ME.
Drops a few points for showing increasing signs of Doucheness, coming dangerously close to Michael Phelps levels.
Britney goes into the Diary Room first. The “reset” button is comically shitty. Big Brother, you are so charmingly fucking terrible. Britney hits the button, because, duh. The game is reset! Buuuuut for some reason we have to watch all four coaches make their decision? Oh god, this is truly the most painful episode in TV history. Boogie is next and he says no to the button, because A) he thinks it’ll make him look cool and he knows that one of the other three will hit it anyway, or B) he’s scared that he’s an idiot without Dr. Will carrying him to the end. Dan hits the button while saying, “It’s time to get…. It’s time to get dirty punching it!” GOOD sentence there, Dan. Very intimidating. And then Janelle comes in and obnoxiously stands up to press the button, to better show off her T&A.
It’s literally impossible to tell what is most fake about this room right now.
Julie tells the houseguests that the game has been “reset” (which: no, no it hasn’t; not for people who were eliminated while the coaches got a free ride, especially old WHAT’S-HER-NAME who was eliminated in the first 10 minutes) (but when has this game ever been fair?) and now both Frank and Joe are safe! Sooooo… all that strategy we saw for the first 30 minutes of this episode? Totally worthless. This episode is just an insult to human intelligence. And this twist is so terrible, and if I were in the game I would start a revolution against the producers and get all the newbies to threaten to walk unless they reversed the decision. Oh wait, @dewforever “love[s] the twist in this game!!! <3” so I guess my opinion is now changed.
TV Social
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31 Comments
Your recaps are the best part of the show and saves me from watching it. So God give you strength to watch this. As for Big Brother what is the point any game moves you make hey wait reset. Well written shocking is right. I bet any one who saw the show tonight good luck trying to sleep after that ! Please keep watching so I don’t have to.
Glad I don’t watch. As for the Oly Men-If that’s Americas’s best ,I ‘ll wait fot the next crop. Must be global warming.
I just want to know who came up with that shitty ‘Sexist Male US Olympian’ list because I’m questioning your/their taste. Some of the men are CLEARLY out of order & the rest shouldn’t be in any sentence even containing the word sexy. I guess you’re into butta faces heh? Nothing wrong with a hot bod, but you have some dogs on that list. To each their own I guess.
On the flip side, your recap was still Gold
And oh yea…Fuck off CBS! We’re not dumb & we know what you’re up to. You’ve been fixing this game every since Jordan’s dumb ass ‘won’. You have once again ruined yet another season of what use to be the best game on tv. Brav-fucking-o.
Julie’s dress looked like a home-ec project. Not sure I’d say she looked good.
@Danny, in true BB fashion, you have the token brother as one of your Olympic hotties! How come your list doesn’t include the openly gay Tim Daley? I, like @fancyface, wasn’t that impressed with your list, but if you like it, I love it!
In terms of the episode, I fully expect that the game is rigged, which is why Chima’s meltdown over Jeff’s cout d’etat was so “epic” (thank you, Flipit, for posting that clip again last week!) But there are times when players squander their Grodner power (remember Matt and the Diamond Power of Veto that he used to eliminate Kathy in Season 12?)
But, let’s be real, if the coaches did not come back into the game, would you really want some combination of Frank or Joe, Kara, and JoJo to come back into the game? As much as the twist is bullshit and basically a replica of Daniele’s coasting the first four weeks of last season (I forget what they called that), I think it’s better ratings-wise for the returnees to play than to see the current season’s returning hamsters get a second chance.
Why do the producers of these games think we want to see old asshats come back ? Survivor I am talking to you too. Let these people have a chance to play their own game!! This is a stupid twist and I am not looking forward to even watching, but I will becuase nothing else is on. Oh Damn you BB!!
Great recap (and thanks for saving me time). I can now delete this show from my DVR.
Oh yeah – and thanks alot “America” for your vote!
Funny how every tweet that was posted (which I HATE tweets posted on my TV with a red-hot passion) prior to the big shocking annoucement that coaches could vote to re-enter was supportive of coaches re-entering. @getalife – Geez I have my fingers crossed that the coaches come back #loveBB
Wierd how Boogie had no qualms about taking the lion’s share of the 10K (nice burn Chen) but when it came to turning 100K into 500K he said NO DEAL. Does he has Genital Warts on his brain? OR Does he realize what a lame ass hated player he is and his days are numbered?
totally agree with nathan adrian at #1. i’d towel him off after he gets out of the pool anyday.
Ugh. The only way this season can redeem itself is it a noob wins HOH and puts two coaches on the block. But you know that’s not what will happen because.
And I really do believe that America voted and America wanted the coaches in the game. What they didn’t tell you is that when they say “America” they meant America, the craft services lady that makes muffins for the crew.
You silly things – did you actually think that they meant “America” to mean the general viewing population? That would just be ridiculous.
Ha – need to lay off the booze before noon (though it IS 5:00 somewhere). I was saying that a noob won’t win and put up two coaches because we’ve all been very bad humans and this is the universe’s way of getting back at us.
The fact that you find those men to be the hottest US olympians is way more controversial than the “twist”.
Lady Necklace the only exception. *drool*
I agree CL. That’s the only way to make this interesting. TAKE THE GAME BACK NEWBIES!!!
@9 Consider– I vote the latter. Mike Boogie is sooooo cringy-worthy. He always has been from his first season on the show. Does anyone remember the bumpkin he “proposed” to from Louisiana?? The girl not Doc. Will–dermaltologist to the home shopping channels.
I must take exception to the naysayers on how hot the Olympians are. I say a big thank you because they are all delicious.
I would love to see a tweet like this: this twist blows and so does Janelle!
Holy crap-I just saw the video of Sid Vicious’ ankle fracture!!!
Danny, I’m right with ya, and I didn’t even see this! My DVR was smart enough to reject it wholly and tape PR and the Olympics instead (I am sooooo frikkin livid at the frikkin coverage of the gymnastics, GRRRRRRRRR!!!!!)
I hate feeling manipulated, and that episode smacked of it soooo heavily!!!
As to your list, what are these people complaining about . . . sigh . . . myself, I prefer a real man, with some heft to him, but if I had to choose from these younglings, I think you got a pretty good slice. Danell to me is a Greek God, tho I guess he’s a Cuban God, really. So very sexy, esp for a gymnast. Sam and Jake are also very cute. Agree on the Douche factor for Lochte, and your winner, I haven’t seen, but I’ve heard him mentioned before. I’m sure if we all dug more there’d be a whole new crop of cuties in running, and jumping and discus etc.
I’ll get over the twist if Janelle eliminates Boogie right now . . . then chef . . . I cannot fucking stand that chef douche one more second, I have trouble watching these episodes I’m so overwhelmed with hate and discust. I also can’t believe this turned in his favor–I just can’t!
I, like many, do not like this twist but am happy that everyone got to play for HOH and that nobody was eliminated. I still love me some Dan and would like to see both him and Ian as final two. Then I don’t care who wins between the two. Great recap – you captured the feeling of the show perfectly!
@Beebs….Completely agree! Julie’s stylist should be fired based on that yellow monstrosity alone.
BBUK is rigging the game so the worst person in the UK can win & now Grodner is fucking up BB again. My BB summer is officially over! *turns on computer to see who’s evicted from bbuk tonight*
The PAs at the BB studios were working overtime signing up for twitter accounts under new names so they’d have at least a couple of positive twits to flash on the screen about this stupid stupid twist.
And yeah, basically the entire past week of BB was a complete waste of time.
This show sucks. Thankfully I leave on vacation next week and ordinarily I’d try to keep up with the show, but this year, I just won’t bother.
Fuck you, CBS!
No Matt Grevers? Hmmmmmm…..
God Bless the USA and God Bless you Danny for re-capping this crapfest.
On additional thought, rather than or in addition to , putting sharks in the water they should also have cannons loaded with cow dung aimed at the contestants to be shot off at random intervals. Now that’s an HOH competition.
I am now entertaining myself by speculating on ways Allison will have to make it appear legit as she is contractually obligated to keep the coaches ooops I mean new players safe until the final 4.
@Considerthis, well, I’m sure there will be numerous Pandora’s Boxes, coup d’etats, diamond powers of veto, co-veto holders (remember that bullshit to keep Rachel in the game with Jordan last season?), and any other bullshit she came come up with to screw over the New people, like she did last season.
sooooo beyond pissed at CBS right now. Sure, the past few seasons have been shady and crappy but this takes the cake. WHAT was the point of the past 3 weeks, or Shane’s (nearly EPIC) HOH week?
This is awful, I don’t even give a shit about the rest of the season because some Vet will win AGAIN, and CBS has proven they’ve fixed the show….how can I even trust the rest won’t be the result of some shady bullshit?
Annie, you can trust that whatever happens WILL be the result of shady bullshit. That’s what Big Brother has become, after all. Just more celebrity whoreism. Survivor too for that matter.
Wow. I’m astounded that I’m the only person (it seems) around here who LOVES this episode, the twist, and Boogie/Frank (and a few others…NOT the chef who never learned about having an “inside voice”).
Oh, well. Hopefully things progress and everyone starts to feel better about this season.
Speaking of scantily clad athletes…I take it we’ll have to wait for TheMiki to post the gals version?
What I hate most is all the hugging…why are they ALWAYS hugging?
Agreeing with others. Can’t we just watch a fuckin’ new show with new people. Do they think we really need to be spoon-fed former players. Big fuckin’ deal:
a big-titted blond who once has a snazzy quip 7 years ago,
a bible bashing loud-mouthed dorky junior high football coach,
some douchey, coat-tail riding, egomaniac from NH that inexplicably has restaurant success in LA
a snarky player that got duped last season
Just put new people in game and stop trying shove these former tools down our throats. I’m surprised that they didn’t bring that Evil Dick back this year because he only played one show last season.
And of course “America” was going to vote the coaches back in because unlike the small majority that likes to rail on these dickbag producers and players, the rest of “America” you know are a bunch of raging, uneducated sheep that have no barometer for quality. Of course they were going to vote the coaches back in.
Go back to superpass on 8/18/2012 12:06pm Frank explains how BIG BROTHER Riggs it. The Production gave him a POV chip with House guess choice. He palms it puts it into bag and pulls it out. LAME!!!!!