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Sunday, September 16, 2012
9:36 pm
14 Comments
Tagged: big brother, cbs, funny, hilarious, nightmares, recap, TV, tvgasm
Tonight’s episode is rough, you guys. After the legitimately shocking blindside of Shane by Dan during Thursday’s live show, you’d think Big Brother would jam-pack Sunday’s episode with all sorts of insanity related to the fallout of Dan’s THIRD betrayal of Danielle.
Instead, we get a clip show.
But first! A quick five-minute recap of the period immediately post-eviction. Honestly, I have no idea why they didn’t just air the following Dan/Danielle discussion unedited, for however long it went on, because that would be so much better than, like, re-watching Willie Hantz get kicked out of the house. Willie who? Who the hell were these Jojo and Kara people? Who cares?
I’m going to miss you most, Danielle Face.
Anyway, Danielle is – what else? – weeping in the Diary Room. “Shane, I’m so sorry,” she sobs. “I’m so, so sorry.” Ian is in shock that he’s still here. We see a flashback of Dan grabbing Shane as he leaves the house to whisper to him, “Dude, she’s been playing you the whole time. Ask Jenn.” An interesting ploy to try to win back Shane’s vote, which is definitely never going to happen. Nice try, though, Dan.
Dan then immediately pulls Danielle aside to talk, which we saw a bit of during the live show. Dan explains in the Diary Room that he has Danielle and Ian both wanting to take him to the end, and that Shane wouldn’t have taken him, so now he thinks he’s guaranteed to win. Which is very smart, unless Danielle wins the final HoH and is so mad at Dan (and smart enough to realize he’ll win) to stab HIM in the back and ultimately take Ian. Which, as much as I love Dan, would be pretty awesome and deserved. Sadly, it’ll never happen.
“Why do you continuously lie to me?!” Danielle yells at Dan. Dan immediately launches into a big pep talk, saying he’s coaching her to win and he couldn’t tell her because she’d have to lie to Shane and blah blah blah blah, it’s the same shit we’ve heard the two past times he’s betrayed her. And we all know it’ll somehow work again, which is ridiculous.
Looking great, girl!
Dan blatantly lies to Danielle over and over again, saying he just wants the $50,000 and that he wants to get her the $500,000, and now he says Ian will take Danielle to the end after what Dan just pulled because Ian won’t be able to beat him. (Which, if you think about it, is so, so, so dumb. First of all, SHANE would have taken Danielle to the end, so saying you got rid of Shane to ensure everyone is taking Danielle to the end is just idiotic. Especially because Danielle should know she would have had a much better chance against Shane facing the jury than Ian. Also, telling Danielle that Ian won’t take Dan because Ian knows Dan will beat him should clue Danielle in that she shouldn’t take Dan either. Anyway, that’s why I think this was a terrible move that could fuck him in the end, but that’s assuming that he’s playing against smart people, which he isn’t, so he’ll win.)
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14 Comments
“Apparently Mike Boogie once read the Bible in the house. We learn this through a 5-minute clip of Mike Boogie reading the Bible, and then other people expressing amazement at the fact that Mike Boogie is, in fact, reading the Bible.” I have to admit that Boogie reading the Bible didn’t surprise me – the fact that Boogies knows how to read surprised me! I hate the recrap shows as well – totally boring. I would prefer that they show us plebes footage that the feed watchers saw that wasn’t shown on the regular show. But who am I to question Big Brother… Looking forward to the finale and the final recap for this year!
Well, I give Boogie credit for reading out one of the many passages underscoring the hypocrisy of these make-believe-believers competing with each other to do exactly what their “holy” book tells them they shouldn’t do.
And that, I hope, is that last time I ever have to show my appreciation for him. Ever.
well this was a wasted hour gone of our lives….they should have done the whole hoh thing instead!!!!
“Every fisherman knows you have to slam your fish into a brick wall after you catch it.”
I’d rather see Gollum beat them on a rock.
That picture of Danielle with her mouth dropped about 50 feet creeped me out. It was great! You chose the perfect picture for it too. Great recap!
Danny,
Many thanks for gift-wrapping this turd of an episode (and season). I saved so much time this summer reading recaps instead of watching the actual show.
“I saved so much time this summer reading recaps instead of watching the actual show.”
I wish I were smart enough to do that and break free. Instead, I watch all three episodes every week and even some BBAD as well. That, like our excellent recapper has suggested, makes me no different than Danielle and Grodner is my Dan.
My DVR only taped the second half of this episode. I was going to watch what I missed on cbs’s website, but thanks to your recap I don’t need to waste my time. It was very, very annoying to watch the same clips we saw before.
Actually, i HAD forgotten willie and froot loopgate. So thanks CBS for putting back into my memory!!!
“Take it, you whore.”
You are a better whore than me, Danny . . . I zipped the whole thing with my mouth hanging open like the “horror” shot of Danielle . . .
Willie was kind of hot, but boy was he a Hantz . . . wonder if he’ll be at the reunion, and if so, I doubt he will redeem himself . . .
Threadjack – that chick in the blue reminds me of the annoying Julia from Miss Advised.
Just a reminder that no spoilers are allowed in comments. Go to the forums to talk about results!
The sociopath you refer to in this recap is Danielle, right? That fug skank is the worst of them all.
Amazing you were able to even fashion a recap out of this. Even more amazing that from an entire goddamn summer with every minute in the house being taped, if there were going to give us a clip show they couldn’t bother to give us ALL previously unseen footage? Lazy, lazy lazy. Grodner just continues to show contempt for her audience. But then again, I come back every summer, the same way I come back to my beloved NJ Devils after every strike or lockout. Enabler that I am.