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Shane tells her that even if they lose BB, they’ll always have this awkward elbow in the wiener night to remember. Before she faints, he asks her what she really thinks the gym team thought of him. Dani would have a lot more luck if she could just look exactly like this:
Dan is super love-y towards Dani when she comes back. He tells us he doesn’t mean it, he just wants to lull her into a false sense of security so she’ll feel free to gain twenty pounds overnight and lose the gay guy for good. It seems to work.
Time for the Veto ceremony. Shane is in team colors again.
Obvs, he takes himself off the block. Now Ian is finally free to backdoor Dan and get rid of his biggest competition. So he puts up Dani. OH LAWD. I know a lot of people are rooting for Ian, but I just can’t. He seems like a nice kid and all, I just don’t believe nice people should have money. They usually waste it on the needy, and I HATE neediness.
During commercials, we get an awkwardly close shot of Jessica Simpson talking about how she wants to sing better, so she joined Weight Watchers.
I’m gonna get me an Oscar, y’all!
PS: This is the commercial that followed Weight Watchers:
Time for Save Me speeches. Jenn knows she’s a goner, so she’s really nice to everyone. You can tell she’s sad, though, cuz she couldn’t even muster enough energy to wash her knees.
Dani just spits chewed cereal all over everyone. There are only two votes tonight, and both Shane and Dan vote Jenn out. Jenn takes it like a man. She tells them all “The winner is in this room! Stay classy!!” I don’t know what she’s talking about. Neither does she. The interior reaction shots are of the remaining contestants not giving two shits that she left. On the outside, JennPity shouts at the monitors “It’s ok, babies!” HAHAHAH!!
Pity blames herself for not winning the POV and keeping herself in the game, not anyone else. Yes, but you saved Dan. Was that the right move? Well, of course it was! Dan’s a really great player. You know how the saying goes: If you can’t beat em, hand them half a million dollars and stare into the cameras with bug eyes while spouting off nonsense in a really gruff voice! Chena Dunham doesn’t have the cue card to tell her that that’s not how the saying goes.