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Okay, admission: I was watching this while also watching the DNC. So forgive me if I missed a few things here and there. I’m sorry I was being a PATRIOT. When Joe Biden speaks, you listen, goddamnit. If only in the hopes that he’ll accidentally reveal that Obama supports bigamy or something.
Anyway, Julie opens the show in a long black dress, still clearly excited about Dan’s play this season. Just wait until you see the shit she pulls tonight. It’s Julie Chen at her finest, folks. She reminds us it’s a double eviction night, which is some sweet, sweet music to my ears. Can we make it a triple eviction? Let’s wrap this UP.
We see the previously-on, and let me just say that the clip of Frank saying, “Dan can’t save me with the Veto because it would clue everyone in that we’re working together,” is still heartbreaking. Frank, you sweet puppy dog, you. I can’t believe you’ve grown on me.
Also, can we quickly talk about that Veto Ceremony this week? TheMiki already covered it wonderfully in her recap, but it was RIDICULOUS, you guys. First Frank gave his speech to the house, which was all sorts of scripted and fake, and totally orchestrated by Dan. Then Jenn gave her speech, which was also scripted by Dan. And then, after Dan vetoed Jenn, Ian gave his speech to nominate Joe, which was ALSO scripted and acted under Dan’s orders. The entire ceremony was a sham ceremony, with Dan presiding over the whole thing, and the dramatic irony was some of the richest I’ve ever seen on this show. It was almost poetically beautiful, if I’m allowed to wax hyperbolic in a recap of Big Brother.
Anyway, back to Julie, who looks wonderful and anyone who says otherwise can – wait, wait, wait, is that black dress actually a black JUMPSUIT? I stand corrected. Odd sartorial choices aside, Julie is practically creaming her jumpsuit over this episode, and her excitement is palpable. Let’s GOOOOOO.
After the Veto Ceremony, Joe screams that he’s back up against Frank, but he knows he’s just a pawn. Jenn is relieved to have been saved, and makes a really terrible comparison between the Veto and getting a nice apartment in New York, which is just an ultra-forced way for Jenn to remind us that she’s from New York. It’d be less subtle if she got the Statue of Liberty tattooed on her face. Frank, meanwhile, is confident he has the votes he needs to stay: Jenn’s, Danielle’s, and Dan’s. This is going to be a heartbreaking fifteen minutes.
Later, in the kitchen, Dan and Frank are talking, and Frank is seeking reassurance that he’s okay. Dan gives him that reassurance, and the two begin figuring out scenarios based on who would win the next HoH. Then Dan fucks up. “What about Joe?” he muses. “What if Joe wins?”