Hey guys! Last week’s backdoor eviction of Janelle was MIGHTY shocking, wasn’t it? It was so wonderful to see the new kids thinking for themselves and taking the veterans along for a ride the whole time. Now that one of the most popular Big Brother players of all time had been kicked out, what sort of drama would unfold?!
Turns out: nothing. This episode hit a new low in filler. Good LORD it was terrible. Let’s sit through the dubstep theme song and GET THROUGH THIS! Frank is bragging about how he has survived three evictions, while Joe is pissed that he was the only person not in on the plan, so he’s the only guy who voted against Frank. Whoops! Maybe if you didn’t spend all your time shouting, you’d actually be able to hear what everyone else is planning.
“I stayed in the house, but, more importantly, I looked really good while doing so.”
Wil explains that he just didn’t trust Janelle anymore, but mostly he had to go along with the majority. And now we are subjected to another terrible Boogie/Frank dance celebration over him not getting evicted. Boogie is crowing about the fact that he got rid of Janelle for the second time in his Big Brother career. Congratulations, you outsmarted someone who fake-giggles after everything she says. Britney, on the other hand, can’t stop crying about the fact that she betrayed Janelle, her idol. This is JUST like Dreamgirls (is it? I actually have no idea what that movie’s about).
We flashback to Frank winning Head of Household for the second time, and, ugh. Here we go again with Boogie thinking he’s a genius. Joe is extremely nervous, since he was the only person to vote against Frank (if you forget this, don’t worry: every single person will remind us of this at least twice this episode). Joe mopes by himself. Frank comes in to talk to him (still wearing the stupid Spiritard or whatever it’s called), and asks him how to make carnitas. This is my first indication that this episode is going to have a looooooot of filler. Two guys sitting around talking about how to cook carnitas is not a sign that exciting things are about to occur.
Danielle and Britney talk, and Britney is still crying about Janelle. Good lord, lady, she’s still ALIVE. The only interesting thing (and I’m really stretching here) about this scene is that Danielle appears to have totally sold her soul to the School of Dan: this bitch is heartless now. “You’re that much closer to the money,” she says, fire dancing behind her eyes. It’s a little scary.
“Guys, why is emo Zac Efron hugging me?”
Britney, to her credit, still manages to play fairly intelligently: she recognizes the fact that the new kids basically controlled the game last week, so she needs to make sure that doesn’t happen again. “Frank’s going to win this game,” she says flatly, attempting to drive a wedge between the Shane/Danielle/Frank alliance. “I beat him twice in one week. I can do it again,” Danielle replies, just DEAD INSIDE. She’s going to eat someone’s heart if she stays in this game any longer.