Britney meets with HoHo and Shane to whine about Willie. They both want to separate from him, and Brit agrees. Her strategy is to pout and look forlorn. I really hope that works this time. Time for the Coaches Competition!!
The back yard is set up like a city street, complete with spray painted walls. The budget is super low on this show, so the costumes for this game all come straight from One L’s suitcase.
The goal is to carry blocks of money across a balance beam, and it’s obviously rigged in Boogie’s favor since he’s the only one accustomed to diapers.
Dan shouts in the DR about how he’s gonna throw this competition so he can keep up his weak persona. Um….I’ll just go with it. The peanut gallery shouts out some advice, and I’m surprised no one falls from hearing One L’s nasal shriek. Poor guy. Britney is kicking ass at this one, which I don’t remember ever seeing. One L says she looks like a flying squirrel. HAHAH. Sure enough, she knocks over her stack and is OUT.
Boogie gets his last block on the stack, but he starts cheering for himself on the ground before he hits his 99 cent store click light, so he’s out! LOL!! Britney gets to be sarcastic about what a fucking egotistical moron he is, so in the end, she kinda won after all.
Janelle wins! She decides to save Mobile Spray Tan. I guess it’s natural to save the chld that’s most like you. I’d take the chunky bald chain smoking baby over the perfect brilliant baby with normal sized feet any day. If I had kids, which I don’t. Man. If I do have kids I feel sorry for the ones that are well adjusted and smart. I’m gonna hate them for no reason. I’m getting super depressed.
As the winner, Janelle also gets to choose the have nots for the week. She doesn’t hesitate to put up Willie, and she throws HoHo and Shane in with him. Wow. So she really did wanna break up with Brit, eh? Jesus. There’s one more slot, so she throws Ian in, too, like she’s doing him a favor because he wants the BB experience. He really should just not talk ever. Pretty uncool move to put up all of Team Brit, or as HoHo puts it: “She’s just a mean bitch.”
GirlDick, who really doesn’t say much, tells us that she felt the anger coming off Willie. Then she makes a rape joke, burns a stripper with a cigarette and threatens to murder someone. Wait. None of that is true. Come on GirlDick! You’re making me miss man Dick!!
Please try harder to be a Dick.