Sabrina comes into the hotel room to the amazement of Kate and Jeremiah. Kate clearly doesn’t want to be too complimentary so as not to acknowledge the fact that she’s been upstaged while Jeremiah is sweating bullets. He tells her that she’ll know now why he might complain of having a headache. I’m guessing that means that he’ll be popping a boner. I’ve never heard someone say that before and that’s probably because I hang around people with more wit than that.
Abe and Sabrina head out to Little Italy where they stumble upon a restaurant with a couple performing with a mic and a keyboard.
“Let me see that thooooong!” “Baby make your booty go da-dum da-dum!”
Sabrina announces they are all going cell phone shopping and Kate pretends to not know what texting is. Now they will be properly Christened into the modern age by throwing all couth out the window to keep their faces buried into their phones. Next up, one of them will be hit by a bus because they never bothered to look up to see where they were going. Survival of the fittest.
Jeremiah, Kate, and Sabrina go for happy hour while Rebecca and Abe go for a walk since Rebecca is under 21. The drinkers sit around and talk about the differences between what they’re doing now and what they would be doing at home. Abe and Rebecca discuss the ways of the wicked. They talk about how Amish kids that leave will typically wind up strung out or drunk, or both. That’s not at all surprising. How many of us have grown up with someone who was kept sheltered by their strict parents their entire lives only to wind up moving out at 18 or 19 to turn into a party animal with no control? The most crazy kids I’ve ever known had super strict parents. Those kids have seen and done things I would have never thought to do or at least had the mind to know that it would be a bad idea. Note to parents: give your kids some space and ability to make their own mistakes. You’ll be glad you did.
Jeremiah is talking to a couple of dudes at the bar who can’t figure out why Jeremiah only completed eighth grade and are shocked to learn he’s 32. Me, too. He acts like a 23-year-old douchenozzle.
Meanwhile, Rebecca and Abe are sitting on a stoop talking to a Muslim couple who just got married. The Muslim lady asks why they want to leave the Amish and the man tells them that normally, his lady would be covered up so they have an idea of what they’ve gone through. The lady warns them to not let themselves get led astray in The Village as they’ve seen a lot of people go down the rabbit hole.
Back at the bar, Sabrina asks Jeremiah about this girlfriend he’s rumored to have, which leads him to talk about his reasons to not go back. They also bring up the fact that when they go home, they’re not going to have anyone to care about them. This sends Kate into a drunken tailspin. Sabrina thinks that Kate is a schizophrenic, but she’s really just a drunk.