Breaking Bad Recap: The Science Project

Recaps

By Saint Clare of Assisi | Tuesday, July 17, 2012 | 5:50 pm | 11 Comments
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Posted in: Breaking Bad, Featured, Recaps

Jesse approaches the truck. Walt turns on the magnet. And it works! At a little less than 40 feet from the truck, the laptop goes dead.

Sounds easy, right? Hold on. Then, it flies from Jesse’s grip and slams into the side of the truck, shattering. To be safe, Walt has the Junk Man double the amperage on the batteries to make the magnet even stronger. So their secret magnet weapon works.

Mike offers one last nagging doubt…if the magnet is THAT powerful, everything in the evidence room will slam around. The cops will be onto them in no time. Walt, cooly, replies that this won’t be a problem. In sixty seconds, they’ll be gone.

Walt is too old to know he just referenced a Nicholas Cage movie

HOSPITAL

So let’s see how ol’ Teddy is doing these days. She looks hesitant to even be here. But eventually she musters the strength to go see him. Finds her way to his room and when she first sees him…holy shit, she’s upset.

Yeah…

Boner-killer

EXPERT MEDICAL DIAGNOSIS, FROM DR. SAINT CLARE OF ASSISI: What have we got? He’s bald, with a neck brace, so I’m guessing Ted’s had a skull fracture and maybe a broken neck too. But he IS conscious, and he’s talking in full sentences. His voice is raspy but it looks like all his cognition is there, so it looks like he’ll recover eventually.

Ted is definitely cognizant enough to remember what led to him being put in the hospital: the run-in with Hewell and Bill Burr, all orchestrated by Skyler. But fortunately for her, he’s benevolent about it. He tells he didn’t tell the cops what really happened, that he told the cops it was an accident. Ted’s got kids and he just wants to be left alone. He won’t bother her if she won’t bother him.

Which, really, is almost as devastating for Skyler as Ted being dead, because now their relationship is over.

But at least Walt doesn’t have any competition any more, right?

ALBUQUERQUE PD

And now it’s time for Operation Giant Magnet to commence.

It’s night. The police station is surrounded by a 12-foot high fence, and covered with security cameras. For Mike that’s a cinch. He approaches the building sprays a foamy substance onto the cops’ security camera. Then he hotwires the passcode box and gets the gate to open. He flashes a flashlight off towards Walt and Jesse, who are about a hundred yards away in the truck from the junkyard.

Walt and Jesse drive through the gate. They head around the back to the parking lot outside the evidence room. To get close enough for the magnets to work, they have to drive up onto the curb.

Dude, I just blew a tire hitting a curb in LA the other day. Fuck me I’m having flashbacks

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Saint Clare of Assisi attended Boston University and has written for The Onion.  He took his name from the patron saint of television, who was a virgin and saved a boy from a wolf one time.

11 Comments

  1. 1
    Nolongerbre
    Posted July 17, 2012 at 8:26 pm

    Welcome Back! Your absence was very much noted and I enjoyed your recap a lot (but that was to be expected right?). I had a couple of observations/thoughts: The “because I said so” part made me pee a little myself (you are not alone). Its just awesome to see Walt so… idk, GANGSTA this season. Mike and Gus were the most bad ass on the show, they broke bad years ago I’m sure, but now Walt is finally coming into his own. It was a trip for sure, I dont think anyone but Gus could have made Mike shut up in the past (and Im saying this as a BIG Mike fan). This is going to be an interesting final season for sure. About Walt leaving the large tip and showing the waitress his ID- I think that was some foreshadowing of Walt trying to create an alibi of sorts. I mean he would have to know that if asked later, a waitress would remember a guy who made a birthday candle out of bacon, was from out of state, and left a freaking $100 tip ON A FREE MEAL. Yeah theres no way shes going to forget that, I just cant fathom why he would go to all of the trouble to set up that alibi. Interesting theory I am shooting around. Sorry its so long but this is one of my favorite shows ever. I’m with you on the hoping they don’t end an amazing series in a formulaic “Scooby Gang” solve the mystery by end credits kinda way.

  2. 2
    SuburBint
    Posted July 17, 2012 at 9:29 pm

    I LOVE it when they have events in the beginning of the episodes that don’t get explained until the end of the season. Like the detritus and HAZMAT guys at the pool in season 3. Hope Future Walt is a recurring theme as well, building toward the finale. I’m so glad this show is back!!!!

  3. 3
    BLSD
    Posted July 17, 2012 at 10:39 pm

    Enjoyed the recap. A couple of points, nitpicking maybe, but they bother me a little: First, after meeting in the desert, Mike, Jesse and Walt leave one of the cars out there. HUH? They’re desperate to obliterate anything that might bring police attention and they leave a car out in the desert with a door open no less. Hmm, guys, cars have VIN all over them, registrations and so forth. And even out in the desert, the car will be found sooner or later on that pretty well traveled road. Second, Mike and Walt were openly talking in the junk yard about their plan to destroy evidence with the magnet. Don’t you think that was a little careless? Surely the police will canvass every place with a powerful magnet.

  4. 4
    lindaw205
    Posted July 18, 2012 at 6:15 am

    Oh crap! I cannot believe I forgot this was back on and didn’t even DVR it!! ARGH!!!! I’m so disappointed in myself.

  5. 5
    timgunnssister timgunnssister
    Posted July 18, 2012 at 7:06 am

    Love this show. Was discussing it with Mr.timgunnssister. We agree there was something…..lacking…..in this first episode. And I speculate that ‘Walt’ is still missing (remember his fugue state?). I’m not certain Walt ever came back – but Heisenberg did. In the beginning I think we saw mostly Walt with flashes of Heisenberg but now that’s flipped – we see mostly that bad black hatted dude with occasional flashes of Walt – the scene with the baby, for example.

    The opening sequence is definitely one to ponder. Why does he need the big gun? Who is he going to kill next? Just what is Walt/Heisenbergs total body count to date? And does Skye really think Walt will let Ted live? Really?

  6. 6
    MrsMiaWallace MrsMiaWallace
    Posted July 18, 2012 at 11:54 am

    Great recap! It is very impressive to make a recap of a drama funny and you nailed it!

    I loved the baking soda volcano best :)

  7. 7
    mjhhawk
    Posted July 19, 2012 at 10:44 am

    Welcome back!

    I’m not one usually to nitpick, especially on this show where the do a great job of tieing up loose ends…..but with the Gus Fring murder being such a huge deal wouldn’t the police have immediately gone through his computer and not stashed it in evidence?

  8. 8
    maryedith
    Posted July 20, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    St Clare! Awesome recap. And awesome other Gasmi watchers who pick up on all the details. I love it when people “nitpick;” it means they’re as into the show as I am. I look forward to watching this season with you guys.

  9. 9
    SuburBint
    Posted July 21, 2012 at 9:06 am

    @ mjhawk — No, the police would most likely have kept everything in evidence until they had gathered all of the things that they felt were relevant to their case, and then would have started actually sifting through it, piece by piece. It’s all about allocation of resources and the whims of the lead investigator. Also, since Gus is dead now, they probably feel like they can take a moment to breathe before taking down his drugs operation, since his underlings are going to be completely at loose ends now that their boss has so suddenly been all blowed up.

  10. 10
    SuburBint
    Posted July 21, 2012 at 9:07 am

    OMG, did we know about this?! http://youtu.be/risBO1uupRc

    The internet is a magical place.

  11. 11
    Cocodawn Nicole
    Posted July 23, 2012 at 12:41 pm

    “Walt gave the cigarette, poisoned with ricin, to Saul. Saul then had his henchman Huell sneak the poisoned cigarettes into Jesse’s pocket where Brock could find them and get a hold of them.” I’m confused by what you say here, as this is not what happened. Walt originally put the poison in the cigarette and gave it to Jesse to use on Gus. Jesse had it until Huell stole it off him. Walt had him do this to make Jesse think Gus knew about it, stole it, and used it to poison Brock.

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