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Hey Gasmii! Back here with you for another exciting week of West Virginia misadventure! Last week Shae finally accepted the fact that her boyfriend Jesse J was a lying snake and rebounded with Joey and a jar of apple butter; Jesse Bleep generally creeped everyone out and got an ass kicking courtesy of Tyler; and Shae, Ashley, and Cara got some ill-advised tattoos. Onward!
Episode 7: Raging Bulls
Shain, Ashley, Salwa, and Joey are at the grossest-looking diner I’ve ever seen. Ashley notices in the newspaper that there’s a rodeo coming to town and it’s open for anyone to ride the bulls. She says they should definitely do it, because she hasn’t done it since she was “like 7.” A real bull? What parent is allowing their seven-year-old to ride a real bull? Plus, I call BULL (see what I did there?) on it being open to anyone – my guess is it’s really only open to those that have a reality show on MTV. Shain tells her she should stick to riding cowboys. But he offers to build a fake bull for training. Ashley confesses to us that she’s really in this for the most important thing in life: boys.
Katie, Tyler, and Cara go to a horse ranch in order to get a feel for riding horses before they put themselves on a bull. Katie and Cara are appropriately clothed in jeans, leather boots, and a helmet. Tyler, on the other hand, is wearing basketball shorts and sneakers, and no helmet. I’m no expert equestrian, but I did spend a week at a dude ranch in Idaho when I was 17, and his outfit is a terrible idea. Even if he doesn’t fall off the horse and conk his head, he has some nasty chafing to worry about.
Tyler is impressed at Katie’s “riding skills,” by which he means her ass. Unfortunately for Cara, riding a horse is not one of her talents. Tyler complains to Katie that he was hoping it would be just the two of them, and not Cara. Crush alert!
At the girls’ house, Shae considers filling her air mattress with water to make it a waterbed. They plot ways to fill the mattress with water. Ashley helpfully suggests one cup at a time – Anna and Shae laugh at her. Shae considers the muddy creek. I liked Ashley’s idea better. Why is no one suggesting a garden hose, or, failing that, the beer bong that seems omnipresent on this show? Just run the damn thing under the faucet!
But no. The ladies go down to the muddy creek, and they get more water in their shoes than inside the bed. But Anna has yet another plan: dump a bucket of water from the second floor window to pour it inside the mattress outside? Wow, this really makes no sense whatsoever.