Commentgasm: February 2012

Recaps

By BelowSeaLevel | Tuesday, December 18, 2012 | 7:00 am | 11 Comments
Tagged: , , , , ,
Posted in: Commentgasm, Recaps

 ***The best of your comments continues with BelowSeaLevel’s faves!

Happy holidays, Gasmii!  February is the month of love, so let’s celebrate Gasmii’s greatest love–snark.  Enjoy!

SMH on “Swamp People”:  “I will sit and watch a Swamp People marathon Forrest Gump style (head cocked to one side) any day of the week. Don’t judge me. They’re hypnotic.”

featherhead on “Celebrity Apprentice”:  “Dee can now change his band’s name from Twisted Sister to Twisted Finger!”

Meemo on Fashiongasm: The 2012 Academy Awards:  “Gwyneth looked like a giant tampon. Why in the world has no one else noticed that?”

Finnegan on “Once Upon a Time”:  “granny wanted to get her freak on with august. hilarious. what happened to my man jiminy cricket ? did he fall off the face of the town ?”

the whole thing at the lake was funny. when he put his canteen in the water and the siren popped up i was like “scoop and run,man,scoop and run !!” then when he started talking to it i was waiting for him to just start hacking it to bits.

david’s wife disappearing was strange, i figured she’d have some change of heart and try and come back or something. btw, how was emma supposed to get hansel and gretel to boston if nobody can leave ? regina was basically pushing them outta town; she has to know the deal about leaving town.

david is a wuss. man up, buddy. now everyone in town thinks you’re an ass and your girl is a trashy skank.”

WendyBird on “Once Upon a Time”:  “Yes Maryedith! You did call that and were so right!!! If I could push cookies through my computer to you I would!”

classy drunk on “Pretty Little Liars”:  “Sorry if this makes me creepy but is Hannah the only one that has done sex?

Because in the last episode or the one before that it seemed like they were trying to allude that Emily and Maya had sex, but I don’t know.

They were sluttier on 90210…you know…except Donna.”

sarcasatire on “Real Housewives of Atlanta”:  “I, for one, do not believe for a second that Kim wouldn’t hold a Black Baby. You know why? Because Black Babies are awesome! Not only would Kim *hold* a Black Baby, she’d pop a titty in its mouth like Selma Hayek on a press tour. I mean, who doesn’t love a Black Baby? Gay men style the fashion icons of our times and who are they most likely to adopt? A Black Baby! (A timeless accessory..goes great with everything.)

Sandra Bullock went from being married to a racist to being the mother of a Black baby.
And when she pretended to adopt one that was half grown, we gave her an Oscar!

Look to your left…Look into those eyes…
<————— behold the power of the Black Baby!”

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Living in New Orleans, it helps to be a good swimmer.  

 

 

 

11 Comments

  1. 1
    jerseyj
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 7:11 am

    You love me! You really love me! I’d like to thank the members of the academy and the cast of jersey shore for the plethora of STD jokes :) Also, my elementary school history teacher for imparting upon me the knowledge that Native Americans were largely wiped out by smallpox infested blankets. But…mostly the STD jokes :p

  2. 2
    dear crabby
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 7:41 am

    “Australopithecus trying to figure out an iPad.” – totally brilliant!

  3. 3
    plockness monster plockness monster
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 7:46 am

    I think it’s safe to say that there could be an entire Commentgasm dedicated to the musings of notwithoutmytv. You, my friend, are a comic genius.

  4. 4
    chaosbutterfly
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 8:05 am

    ^Truth.

  5. 5
    JimbobJones
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 8:18 am

    Man, I hope my comments get better later in the year. I got one in each month, but I’m a bit disappointed in the quality of them.

    A lot of these are comedy GOLD though.

  6. 6
    labowner
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 9:58 am

    Oh my gawd. I made it twice this month. Yeah. Thank you to all my muses. Everyone clap with me “Hercules, Hercules, Hercules”. Or jump around with me ala Tracy Flick – best movie evah.

    Heads up – the page goes screwy on 7 and 8.

  7. 7
    Gypsy Gypsy
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 11:26 am

    Excellent job Gasmii. Way to smark out way into infamy!

  8. 8
    April
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 2:04 pm

    aww good job guys. I gotta try harder next year to get on there!

  9. 9
    labowner
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 2:17 pm

    April you still have 10 months of comments to go. You may make it.

  10. 10
    JimbobJones
    Posted December 18, 2012 at 3:54 pm

    *I meant each month *so far*. I figure I made enough funny, stupid, stupid, stupid comments to get in a few more times, but not all 12.

  11. 11
    hot cawfee
    Posted December 19, 2012 at 9:13 am

    Hey— There’s me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you very much!!!!!!!!!!!

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