Dance Moms Recap: Abby Has No Gaydar

108 Comments

1. 1
   Chicken Lips
   Posted March 9, 2013 at 6:07 pm

   Abby kept talking about how Maddie is so expressive with her face and the judges need to see that. I just figured out what that expression is – Constipation. When Maddie dances, she looks constipated. Sometimes it is “This is a happy dance” constipation, sometimes it is a “How do I survive such tragedy?” constipation, but it is always constipation. I wish that someone would feel sorry for her and give her an exlax laced brownie.

2. 2
   bec
   Posted March 9, 2013 at 8:10 pm

   I usually find the recaps funny, but personally I think this comment \ Yes. Abby said “hubba hubba” when this guy hugged Brooke. Because he clearly loves women.\ was pretty innappropraite. He’s just a young guy and you know nothing about his sexuality. Being a dancer or looking a certain way doesn’t mean he is gay.

3. 3
   bec
   Posted March 9, 2013 at 8:16 pm

   Or maybe I just don’t get the recappers sense of humour, because I’ve never found making jokes about little kids cutting or having an eating disorder funny either…

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   Karyn
   Posted March 9, 2013 at 8:54 pm

   Great recap. Maddie and McKenzie both have terrible teeth. They are going to make some orthodontist alot of $. I think Bec needs to lighten up. I do think that boy really likes Brooke andBrooke is moe “eh, whatever”.

5. 5
   IrishGirl
   Posted March 9, 2013 at 9:29 pm

   Really bec…this is a snark site…lighten up! The entire show has become totally ridiculous…anything and everything about it is a joke!

6. 6
   Chicken Lips
   Posted March 9, 2013 at 9:30 pm

   Wasn’t that the boy that Brooke when on a date with when they were at some competition? Maybe they are two young teens that are destined to be together but they are tragically being kept apart by his parents not wanting to make a spectacle of their son every episode so they only sign the waiver once a season? Maybe?

7. 7
   jen
   Posted March 9, 2013 at 10:50 pm

   I think they tried to set brooke up with a kid named Brandon? I think that was his name. I could be totally wrong since we’ve only seen him once before. And it is a snark site. I don’t think the recapper really wants any of these girls to hurt themselves. Their mothers are doing a great job of that already!

   i have to say I did enjoy Abby’s speed dating questions. Don’t know if she wrote them or if someone else did but they were kind of cute and creative and not what I would expect her to ask. Maybe we saw the real Abby? Or maybe it was her twin? Two Abbys?! I think that’s a sign of the apocalypse!

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   ellemenop
   Posted March 10, 2013 at 5:06 am

   i’m an anorexic fag hag (no, really), and i say keep ‘em coming. i found the captions hilarious. and THANK YOU for pointing out those damn teeth. her teeth look like rotted white corn to me. ugh. i mean, i don’t have great teeth and i don’t usually notice people’s “bad teeth” (i seem to know a lot of tooth freaks who are always whitening or getting a second round of adult braces, and i never see the big deal), but those are just something else.

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   Recka
   Posted March 10, 2013 at 5:13 am

   The boy set up with Brooke was Brandon, the boy in this ep is Nick. Maddie and Mack don’t have great teeth but they are only kids and they have braces, they’ll be fine in a couple of years.

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    April
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 6:22 am

    Yes, the Zieglers have bad teeth but at least they are getting them fixed thank God. I hope Melissa can either get her new rich husband to pay for the braces or either date the orthodontist so she can get a discount because otherwise that woman is going to have to shell out a lot of money to have them completely fixed.

    Brandon was the guy Brooke went on a date with. Nick is another boy dancer in the studio. He actually did a very similar dance as the one this week at a comp and I found the video on youtube. All the girls were in bride dresses and he was the one guy but it was all teenage girls. I will see if I can find it,

    I could not find it but I found two unaired dances the one I think they do this week with the army theme and a Rosa Parks dance that features Nia.

11. 11
    Madelyne27
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 8:00 am

    @jen – i kinda do want them to hurt themselves… but only bc it will provide me a Lifetime Movie called the Maddie Ziegler Story: A Tale of A Girl, A Dream, and A Knife.

    @bec – i have a fairly large arsenal of abortion jokes if you think those would be more fitting… but i figured i’d save them for Brooke’s episode of 16 & Pregnant. /Being a dancer or looking a certain way doesn’t mean he is gay./ Really? Did you see Chaz Bono on Dancing with the Stars? Oh wait… that’s a v confusing example. /I’ve never found making jokes about little kids cutting or having an eating disorder funny/ So you’re saying you’ve tried to make jokes? I agree it’s not an easy subject to mock, but keep working on it. Eventually after watching these shows you’ll find your heart dying a little more each week and it will be easier.

    i kid. (i don’t.) thanks everyone for your comments. i love getting all the back stories that i’m too stupid to figure out.

    abby’s personality at speed dating was awesome. i loved her sense of humor and confidence.

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    Jane and Blanche
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 9:43 am

    Arsenal of abortion jokes…… LMAO!!!!!! Awesome!!! at least you still have a heart;) ours died last summer after bachelor pad. …

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    April
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 9:43 am

    If Abby could reign the crazy in a bit she probably could find a guy. Some men like big girls after all. She seems like she can be fun.

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    ellemenop
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 12:52 pm

    no, see, I feel like something beyond crooked/badly spaced teeth is wrong with mckenzie’s mouth. her teeth are so round and look like they have a weird permanent film over them. they are scary.

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 1:50 pm

    @ellemenop – exactly… there’s a whole bone/jaw structure thing going on there…

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    Dani
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 2:56 pm

    I think MacKenzie has some kind of invisible braces on her teeth, which just makes them look more strange, and large. Her teeth are big for her mouth, just like Maddie’s teeth, but it looks like they are fixing it. My daughter had the same problem, and I’m sure my sons will too. They had to put some contraption in her mouth to open up the jaw to make room for her permanent teeth, then when she was a little older they put braces on. Now she is almost 14 and will be getting her braces off soon and her teeth are so nice and straight and I’m sure she’ll have such a great smile when those braces come off- which should be right before she starts high school. I think they both (Maddie and MacKenzie) would look better if they just had the regular braces on, instead of those invisible things which does look (on Mackenzie) like something is growing on her teeth. Still think she is cute as a button though!

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    Tapnfeet99
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 5:18 pm

    My friend once texted someone “Meet me at the abortion center” because auto correct didn’t like Albertsons. Her friend freaked out, wondering who impregnated her. I thought that was a funny abortion story.

    Maddie strikes me more as an eating disorder kinda gal, much more so than a cutter. Extreme need to control and be the best usually means anorexia in the future.

    Madelyne, love having you as a substitute. I read your other recaps too and always laugh.

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    ellemenop
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 5:59 pm

    maddie reminds me of girls I’ve been in treatment with; I would also pin her as a candidate for anorexia. I mean, I hope she bypasses that, but if I were her mother I would worry!

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    April
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 6:47 pm

    Going to be a buzzkill and say all the joking about the girls having anorexia and cutting disturbs me.

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    ellemenop
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 6:54 pm

    @april — I’m not joking. I have had anorexia since childhood and been inpatient several times. maddie DOES remind me of girls I’ve been in treatment with, right down to the fake smile and people-pleasing. it’s not at all a joke.

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    Gracie Lou Freebush
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 7:01 pm

    I can’t handle watching this show for now…it makes me sad…but the recaps and photo captions are so hilarious!! Fabulous job!!!

22. 22
    Lulumama
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 7:33 pm

    Hilarious!
    I didn’t find the remarks about sexuality/eating disorders/cutting etc. to really be jokes, as much as snark and sarcasm. This show has gotten absurd.
    Super big props to your screen captures and captions!
    I laughed so hard–and I’d love to see what captions we could come up with for Abby’s speed dating…LMAO!!!!! I don’t think there are words.

23. 23
    Sunny
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 8:47 pm

    I like your recaps. I can have a dark sense of humor too. Plus, they are soooo much shorter than the usual recaps for this show! With the 12+page ones, I usually skip the recap and just read the comments. *shrug*

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    JJFag
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 9:06 pm

    @April your pretty much always a buzzkill in the comments with all your \ insider\ knowledge on the show, and your personal experiences that no one really cares about besides you. I love the snark and totally agree maddie gives anorexic vibes, considering the extra weight the camera adds if I were Melissa I would totally be concerned!

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    Tapnfeet99
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 9:30 pm

    Ellemenop, I have a perfectionist, self-controlling, people-pleasing personality and many anorexic tendencies, but never got to the point of actual anorexia. That’s why I’m saying she is most likely to go that route. Maddie is the textbook personality for it. I don’t know if Melissa is smart enough to see that though. I also know a set of sisters I grew up dancing with….older daughter was apple of mom’s eye and praised constantly for being a great dancer, little sister was basically ignored. Yet it was the little sister who wound up with anorexia, the older one with bulimia.

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    Samantha
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 10:18 pm

    Did anyone else notice that ever since Sophia came, Maddie has been doing a lot more turns? I noticed a few weeks ago and she’s trying to make it look like Sophia’s too. I feel like she should just forget about Sophia since she could be better then Sophia in another area of dancing (maybe stretching on the floor and looking into the distance simultaneously?)

27. 27
    Ashash
    Posted March 10, 2013 at 11:00 pm

    I enjoy snark as much as the next person as well as detailed recaps since I do not watch the show. Maybe I am in the minority when I say I enjoyed the recaps when the recapper actually seemed to like and hope the girls succeeded. Can’t wait till next week’s recap!

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 4:04 am

    I can’t wait till next week’s recap either! Thanks for all the great comments. Even the bad ones make me laugh.

    **I stretch out on the floor and look longingly at all of you**

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    ellemenop
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 4:51 am

    @tapnfeet — yes, maddie’s personality is “textbook” anorexia but it doesn’t always happen that way, obviously. I’m not a people pleaser or a perma-grinner by ANY means. I also never would consider myself a perfectionist, as I don’t have any goals I strive for, but in treatment they tell you that’s another form if perfectionism (too scared to fail/won’t try things do failure want happen, but I think it’s crap … I’m a pretty big underachiever and I don’t care). I’ve known others like me, but the “textbook” types are just more common (hence the stereotype). and of course it doesn’t mean all perfectionists become anorexic or bulimic or ED-NOS … some just do exactly what they set out to do, and some chill out. obviously the more your environment stresses the importance of your body, the higher your risk, but even with tons of risks it’s not that formulaic.

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    ellemenop
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 4:53 am

    ps I still think eating disorder jokes are funny. my husband does not (I make them around him sometimes). my life would be way too depressing if I couldn’t make fun of shit!

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    April
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 6:57 am

    Eating disorders can be funny, just not when you are talking about such bright beautiful talented young girls. Adults, eh. I have no problem making fun of any or all adults since they should know better.

    I am a lazy perfectionist myself. I am an only child and my parents always expected me to be such a vision of perfection since I was the only child they had. If I was a failure at something they had no other kids to fall back on. I still get crushed if they show any disapproval at me. I never had eating disorders or cutting or any of that stuff. Just some hysteria now and again.

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    ellemenop
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 7:18 am

    they should KNOW better? should people suffering from cancer know better and just respond to their chemotherapy? eating disorders are a disease. it’s not about knowing or not knowing.

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    Dani
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 9:06 am

    @ellemenop– Did I miss something? Where did it say that someone should know better? I just don’t see where that is..? Know better than what??

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    ellemenop
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 9:12 am

    @dani — post #31: “Eating disorders can be funny, just not when you are talking about such bright beautiful talented young girls. Adults, eh. I have no problem making fun of any or all adults since they should know better.”

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    Realitytvjunkie
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 9:16 am

    The captions on the dates were hilarious!!!!! And oh lord will I ever be able to look at a 50 yard line again without seeing a naked abby rolling around on it?!?!?!

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    Dani
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 9:19 am

    Thanks ellemenop!! I must have missed that. I agree with you that eating disorders are a disease and shouldn’t be made fun of- for children OR adults. BTW, I speak from a LOT of experience in the eating disorder area..

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 9:39 am

    @jjfag – hahahhahaha… I could barely cut myself i was laughing so hard.

    EVERYTHING can be funny to someone. But it def sounds like many in this group would not love my rape material at all. and anorexia isn’t a disease… it’s a gift. i speak as a person with a few extra pounds that could use a healthy dose of an eating disorder. I tried to become bulimic but i’d always forget the purging side of it. so i’d binge and then just sleep.

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    chaosbutterfly
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 11:19 am

    Madelyne’s recaps are always wrong in the perfectly right way.
    I actually shudder (or maybe I salivate…can’t decide) to think of the comment wars that would erupt if she were to take over T&T.

    I can see Maddie being ano and Chloe cutting. I can see Kendall being bulimic.
    Can’t see Brooke having any kind of those issues.
    She would actually have to give a shit, and you know she doesn’t.
    Of course, I hope that none of them ever do any of those things….Maddie is very annoying, but I wouldn’t wish that stuff on her.

    @Samantha, I’ve been seeing alot more Sophia in Maddie’s routines, definitely.
    The turns for sure, but there are also some moves that I’ve seen in Sophia’s routines on youtube that are now magically showing up in Maddie’s. And of course, Maddie now does her hair like Sophia.
    I hope Sophia locks her windows and doors at night….next step will be Maddie showing up to rehearsal wearing her skin.

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    MisRed
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 11:27 am

    @Madelyne27- I’m ordering myself a tape worm off Ebay- you want one?

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    April
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 11:40 am

    I meant making fun of anything about adults in general is fair game. Kids I have a few lines I don’t like crossed personally.

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    Sunshine
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 11:57 am

    These were some of the funniest captions yet!

    I have said this before…..this is NOT the recapping site you should come to if things offend you. It’s meant to be a snarky site. There are plenty of places to read recaps of this show that are not.

    Madelyn27, hilarious! Don’t ever change LMAO

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 12:25 pm

    @misred – yes please. i will take an extra large. i’ve always loved getting the flu or food poisoning… great weight loss methods.

    @april – i know you like snark like the rest of us… but mocking only the adults is for the weak… i’m not weak and i judge kids from birth to adulthood.

    @sunshine – my dad was a preacher. my sister home schools her 4 kids. one of my brothers is a famous comedian that has no boundaries, and my 20 year old daughter was an abortion survivor (i didn’t have enough money in college)… i was destined to be hated.

    oh how i will miss you all. snoopk8 has a great following. (minus the weaklings).

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 12:43 pm

    @misred – love your blog…

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    IrishGirl
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 1:29 pm

    Madelyne27, excellent and hilarious recaps! I can’t bring myself to actually watch this show anymore because I find the mothers more so than Abby to be an embarrassment to my hometown Pittsburgh. I find April to be the biggest pain in the ass on this site and I’m glad somebody else sees that, too and called her out on it. I’m betting she’s the type that if you have a headache then she has a migraine; if you have a cold then she has the flu., etc. Although I love SnoopK8′s recaps, you will be missed!

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 1:52 pm

    @irishgirl – i only have two friends… but i’d be willing to up it to three if you’re available.

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    April
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 2:08 pm

    IrishGirl: Who pissed in your Cheerios? Considering some of my comments made the best comments of the year thingamabob, obviously your opinion is not everyones.
    Madelyne: No hate girl. I liked the recap and that part actually was fine by me. I think it was all the continued discussion about it that kinda got to me. I try to keep in mind that the kids did not sign up for this reality crap and go a bit easier on them. Of course, Toddlers and Tiaras brats are immune to this and I am willing to make immense fun of them with everyone else. So maybe I am just biased about being very snarky about kids I like. I like the Dance Moms girls because they have always been nothing but sweet little girls. Their mothers are a different story.

    Thanks for filling in Madelyne. I just got over a stomach bug this past weekend and I have yet to weigh myself but my pants do feel a bit looser so yay! for stomach bugs! And don’t forget dental surgeries or just any surgeries, those help you lose weight too against your will! Always was excited about those too.

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    April
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 2:09 pm

    Oh and Irishgirl: who is this everyone you are referring to? You seem to be the only bitch personally dissing other posters by name. BAM!

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 2:21 pm

    @april – “everyone” refers to @JJFag. you just always seem to come off like you have the insider info. but you don’t realize that we don’t care about it. yes, there are certain scenes that we like to hear about the drama… but mostly we just like to mock and judge… but you’re always “the cheerleader who did this”, or “the dancer that was there”, or “the cutter that didn’t cut”, and “the anorexic that didn’t puke”… WE ARE HERE FOR A LAUGH. and these kids are lifetime movies in the making.

    We all know it’s scripted and not real… we choose to not care.

    anyone that finds my humor offensive is allowed their sense of morality. but for myself and my friend(s), we find everything funny. it’s never too soon, too far, or the wrong time. laugh and the world laughs with you, cry… and you suck fking eggs….

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    ellemenop
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 2:30 pm

    I’m finding just reading these comments much more amusing than participating. I am cool with eating disorder jokes. some people are just off-putting no matter what they say.

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    Suebrz
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 2:36 pm

    Madelyn, your recaps always make me laugh . That’s why I take the time to come read this. I don’t understand why some people (April) come here on their moral high horse. Go join the million mom’s or a bs religious group. Eating disorders can be funny and if you have been out in society lately, surely you notices that more people should have them. I’m hoping the season cliffhanger is Abby vomiting over a toilet & trying to trim down her fat ass.
    Many of these girls are eating disorders waiting to happen. And when they end up on Celebrity Rehab, hopefully, Madelyn will be here to get us thru it..

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 2:40 pm

    wouldn’t be a cliffhanger is abby vomits over toilet… i would simply worry about the toilet.

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    Suebrz
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 2:44 pm

    Haha. The porcelain will crumble beneath her gurth. The only thing hanging will be her blubber

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    TurtleGirl93
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 2:47 pm

    Holy h*ll, @Madelyne27, your abortion survivor comment made me choke on my greek salad. TurtleBoy finally had the opportunity to practice his heimlech(sp?) manuever.
    Not even gonna lie–I noticed Brooke eating the Doritoes while Abby was tirading and my first thought was “Yep, she’s eating her emotions.” Been there, done that and have the years of therapy (and the belly band) to help me make better choices. I too love a good (or bad, I’m not discriminating) eating disorder joke.
    I can’t wait until Lifetime Movie Network debuts it’s movie of the week, “Dance Girls: Emoting in the Dark” based on all their lives. I really hope there’s a wire hanger scene.

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    IrishGirl
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 2:48 pm

    I’m available Madelyne….if you ever visit the ‘burgh,we’ll go to the Dance Moms hangout (Olive or Twist) and make fun of everybody…see if we can pick out who’s going to the bathroom to puke, cut, etc. Love ya, girl! And anybody that doesn’t can kiss my sweet Irish arse!

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    IrishGirl
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 2:52 pm

    And April…I never said everyone…I said someone…get your facts right when it comes to me.

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    ellemenop
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 2:58 pm

    @irishgirl — ” if you have a headache then she has a migraine; if you have a cold then she has the flu., etc. ” this is my most unfavorite type of person ever. EVER. I’m still laughing at this, although I read it for the first time about half an hour ago.

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 3:04 pm

    i have a migraine/flu combo… i’m hoping to lose 14 lbs… i’m helping it along by cutting myself and praying that the blood loss will help my diet.

    anorexia typically makes teeth worse, so i hope that maddie is taught about the benefits of a dental dam, or swallowing.

    (i’m determined to make you all beg for SnoopK8 back”… bc my abortion jokes only get worse.)

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    KJN
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 3:12 pm

    @Madelyne Well, it appears I (and apparently my kid) have a sick, twisted-ass sense of humor, too. My 21 year-old daughter has her first full female physical this week and they sent her a form 5 pages long to fill out. We were going over it last week when she got home for spring break and when we got to the part about any pregnancies, she joked that she should write down “yes” and then put in the date 2003. Which would have made her 10. Then I suggested that next to “abortions” that she write down that she was an abortion survivor. I almost died when I read your comment. Oh, how I love your recaps…

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 3:20 pm

    @kjn – see… you get what i’m cookin’… i’ve always been upset that a pedophile hasn’t approached my daughter… or that a teacher didn’t want to have sex with her when she was in 6th grade. it frustrates me that she hasn’t had a gym coach touch her inappropriately or that her teacher didn’t show her x-rated pictures.

    hell, my daughter was never pushed into anything. what a wimp.

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    IrishGirl
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 3:47 pm

    I haven’t laughed so hard in forever!

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 4:01 pm

    @iiash… me either… but i’m beat and have to judge you all… i LOVE the snark… i PRAY you follow me… i need your sarcasm…. my dogs suck.

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    KJN
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 4:02 pm

    I know, right? My kid is hot, dammit! I’m very insulted that the adults in her life growing up didn’t see the potential there. What with her being an abortion survivor and all, too! Hmpf…the nerve!

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    Dani
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 4:06 pm

    I’m having a great time reading all of the comments here! You all are cracking me up!!

    @Madelyne27– I really love the captions next to the pics. Would love to see more of that in general. The “true blood” captions were hilarious! I enjoyed having you here the past few weeks and hope you check in with us and lend us some comments in the future, and if snook needs to go somewhere, you fill in again.

    What other shows do you write for? I don’t watch that much T.V. really (aside from my kids’ dumb shows), but maybe I’ll start tuning in, so I can read your recaps and laugh!!!

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    IrishGirl
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 4:07 pm

    What else do you recap?

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    Madelyne27
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 4:29 pm

    teen mom 2, cheer perfection, and grimm… or according to my husband – anything that pisses him off.

    lets all give a good cut for Dance Moms.

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    Drit-er
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 5:08 pm

    You do captions like nobody else! Go on with your bad self!

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    April
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 6:56 pm

    I am personally looking forward to the Rosa Parks dance episode. I can just hear Holly now “Why is Nia automatically Rosa Parks, just cause she black?” Then Abby will be all “Blah blah ethnicity blah blah.” Or however that used to go down when they used to argue about it last season. Actually Holly might be okay with it since at least it is better than Laqueefa and she was not asked to wear an afro.

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    Tapnfeet99
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 10:22 pm

    The abortion survivor comment was classic. Turtle girl, Mommie Dearest was my favorite movie as a child. My mom thought I was majorly twisted that I loved the Comet all over the dark blue tiles scene. To this day, I still literally LOL whenever someone screams NO WIRE HANgERs!!!

    Abby should follow Kate Hudson on Glee’s character’s advice….”from now on its rice cakes and ipecac or you need to cut off a butt cheek because you need to drop a few”.

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    KJN
    Posted March 11, 2013 at 11:17 pm

    My friends and I used to act out the “no wire hangers” scene back when we were teenagers. That was some classic cinema there, I tell ‘ya.

    “A $300 dress! On a wire hanger!”

    Awesome. Simply awesome.

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    April
    Posted March 12, 2013 at 7:38 am

    My gay father used to act out and reference the no wire hangers thing at me all the time. I still have a greeting card somewhere he gave me when I was little that has a picture of her with the wire hanger looking bitchtastic. I need to watch that movie again because I don’t I have seen it as an adult and it would probably be even better now.

    LOL my captcha is “Grain of salt” . That is what I think about your jabs Irish girl.

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    aintnobodygottime
    Posted March 12, 2013 at 7:45 am

    What makes me chuckle about the thought that Holly might get upset that Nia is Rosa Parks “just because she is black” (and thinking back something Abby said about Nia being the kind of face they would be looking for to be in Lion King) is that here there is a big hullabaloo because there are no black leads in a local high school production of the Wiz (something like 4 kids tried out and only 1 tried out for a lead). Funny how one mom in upset her daughter has a certain role because she is black and another mom is pissed her less talented daughter wasn’t made lead in her first high school play.

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    chaosbutterfly
    Posted March 12, 2013 at 2:08 pm

    ^ Not to start another race war or nothing, but I feel like The Wiz is not The Wiz without black people.

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    IrishGirl
    Posted March 12, 2013 at 3:26 pm

    April get over me already will ya? And OF COURSE you had a gay father…you got the inside track on it all!

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    aintnobodygottime
    Posted March 12, 2013 at 6:27 pm

    @chaos well the brilliance of deciding do that show in a mostly white school (1200 students, about 100 are black) is a whole nother debate. I just got a kick out of the irony of Holly vs. this other mom (whose daughter did cast in the ensemble then quit the show)

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    Mummy Butterfly
    Posted March 12, 2013 at 7:21 pm

    Tee Hee Hee – I rarely comment, but I was TOTALLY the teeny-tiny white girl who played the Scarecrow in “The Wiz” in High School. I could do the body flops and such, and had a mean group of backup crow singers/dancers. *love*

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    Gracie Lou Freebush
    Posted March 12, 2013 at 7:37 pm

    Madalyne27, I wish you’d recap Honey Boo Boo, they are way too reverent (dull) over there. Cant stand the show, but youd do the most snarkily awesome recaps ever!! How about Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders: Making the Team when it (hopefully) comes back next summer/fall? So much to snark about!

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    April
    Posted March 13, 2013 at 6:48 am

    Irish Girl: and yet you keep responding to me?

    Yes, considering I have talked about my gay father on the Drag Race thread for a year now I am sure I just now made it up to prove some kind of a point. I will make sure to tell my father and his husband that they are not gay (because Irish Girl wills it so!) and so they better stop the man sex asap.

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    edgmommy
    Posted March 13, 2013 at 1:56 pm

    Thank you Irish Girl for saying what I think everytime I read the comments! I usually just skip over whatever April is explaining to us. I find it keeps me from being annoyed!

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    IrishGirl
    Posted March 13, 2013 at 11:57 pm

    You’re quite welcome!

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    lovebug
    Posted March 14, 2013 at 8:58 am

    I know right? Finally! You think April will take the hint and get the fock outta here now?! Where have you been IrishGirl? We needed you here weeks and weeks and weeks ago!!!!

81. 81
    Samantha
    Posted March 14, 2013 at 10:57 am

    I kind of enjoy April’s comments. Half the reason I read these recaps are so I can get an inside look on what really happens. Besides, when did this site become a bullying site. Just be quiet and stop being so mean to each other.

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    lovebug
    Posted March 14, 2013 at 12:11 pm

    Oh honey, not bullying. Sorry if I came off that way. Just sick of grand standing. I read this stuff for a laugh not for informative purposes. I thought this was a snarky, fun site. This show is so outrageous you can’t help but make fun of it!

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    chaosbutterfly
    Posted March 14, 2013 at 3:36 pm

    “Half the reason I read these recaps are so I can get an inside look on what really happens.”

    Ew, really?
    I think April is cool and all so this isn’t directed at her specifically, but I only want inside information when it’s scandalously juicy.

    For example, the fact that the moms were protesting for money and not for Kelly? That’s some shit I want to know.
    Kaya’s facebook post spilling all the t on ALDC?
    That’s some shit I definitely want to know.

    But I don’t want all the boring details about how dance/dance competitions/the dance world reallly work.
    If I was interested in real life, I wouldn’t be watching TV.
    This is TVGasm, not RuPaul’s Best Human Encyclopedia Race.
    I’m trying to keep the fantasy alive out here.

84. 84
    ellemenop
    Posted March 14, 2013 at 3:48 pm

    @chaosbutterfly — and here I was thinking I’m the only one who couldn’t care less about the dancing or those “beautiful, talented young girls.” I watch the show for the ridiculous fights and bullshit. I love dance, but I don’t give a shit about some amateur dancers from Pittsburgh doing the same routine every week. for my dance needs I can buy tickets to a real performance.

85. 85
    IrishGirl
    Posted March 14, 2013 at 4:36 pm

    Well I’m sorry if you think I’m a bully. I’m certainly not. But I truly am Irish and have the Irish temper and little patience for BS. Someone else, not me, called April out as always being a buzzkill and I basically agreed. Why she jumped on me, and not the other, was her choice. I just spoke my mind. Welcome to America where we all, including April, have that freedom.

86. 86
    Samantha
    Posted March 14, 2013 at 4:36 pm

    @Chaos that’s what I meant. I love all the fights they have and then finding out the REAL reasons they fought/striked/whatever and how people in the real dance world thought about it at the comps and such and April happens to know these things (along with some others)

87. 87
    DD
    Posted March 14, 2013 at 5:46 pm

    Ok, this is what I think (directed at no one in particular), I like to hear the ends and outs of the gossip mill with the show- as some of you mentioned. I DON’T like to hear how great someone was back when, and how great they could have been if so and so would have given them an opportunity, and how every single thing that comes up in dance moms the show has to do specifically with this person. Some stuff comes up, sure, but not everything!? This is just my feeling. I do see grand standing, and I just try to ignore it, but sure, it’s annoying. It ends up a story about this person, and I’m not hear for that. If we want to go that route, I have plenty of crazy stories to tell, but I don’t think others are interested in that and more interested in their feelings about the episode or maybe some gossip they heard about the show, or members of the show..

88. 88
    DD
    Posted March 14, 2013 at 5:49 pm

    here. Not hear.

    Anyway, I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, but it sounds like I’m not the only one who gets annoyed by it, so thought I would just say in particular what’s annoying- at least to me.. Not sure what’s annoying exactly to others. Basically, I think no one wants to hear your life story and it seems like you know everything and everything that happens has to do with you personally.. That’s all.

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    moonbeam1133
    Posted March 14, 2013 at 9:34 pm

    Ha ha @everyone. I rarely post here but had been secretly thinking what you all are saying.

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    Mamabear9296
    Posted March 14, 2013 at 11:20 pm

    What’s that saying about an elephant in the room meaning something uncomfortable? I think IrishGirl brought it out or at least brought it to the forefront and amen and hallelujah for that! No one is being “mean” or a “bully” on here, at least I don’t see it that way. IrishGirl just had the cajones to say what it seems that most of us readers here think. Without naming names (but I’ll give you a hint….Ap**l) this particular poster could maybe from this point forward just comment strictly on the show and totally refrain from any sharing any life experiences. Seems that’s what everybody does and what everyone seems to want. Just throwing my thoughts out there.

91. 91
    Corinthia
    Posted March 15, 2013 at 6:07 am

    Okay, I haven’t entirely finished reading this thread, but I am getting seriously annoyed with all the posts saying things like everybody is annoyed by April’s posts and April should just go away. Personally, I enjoy reading April’s posts and posts from others that provide \inside\ views and/or relevant personal experiences, and that’s part of why I’m annoyed because I will truly miss these kinds of posts if she and others do stop posting, or water them down to filter out her personal experiences etc, but that really isn’t the point.

    The point is who are you guys to say anybody should stop posting. And some of you are probably about to to say well April herself did it when she mentioned personally finding some of the anorexia/cutting stuff disturbing, but all she did was state her personal opinion that some of it disturbed her, and I think that’s fine whether I agree with her or not. She didn’t go on and on about it, didn’t claim everybody agreed with her, and didn’t demand people doing it stop or go away. Just like I’m fine with any of you saying you hate her posts, but don’t really like seeing people say everybody is thinking the same thing, and really get a little riled up when I here people saying she or anybody else should stop and go away.

    I suppose people are going to flame me for taking any of this little flame war that has been going on too personally, but I just want to keep the free flow of comments here going. The reason I like to come here is really the *different* kinds of people and *varied* perspectives that we have been seing here. I enjoy the recap itself, *and* the silly snark posts, *and* the ones where April (and sometimes others) compare to their own experiences. I personally don’t enjoy super long ones with everything run together in one long paragraph because they are just too hard to read, but hey I don’t complain, I just skip them if I don’t want to read them, duh! I just hope to continue to see the variety of posts that we have always seen here, even though some people seem intent on shutting some of them down…

92. 92
    April
    Posted March 15, 2013 at 6:51 am

    Pluuuleeeze

    See the little turd looking monster (that is what I call my icon) and skip right on over it if you don’t wanna read what I say. Some people only read the recaps and don’t even glance at the comments. The person who used to recap Dance Moms (Don’t remember who it was exactly) actually used to talk about her son who was in dance comps on the recaps. So I don’t know if you have a legitimate complaint unless you want to call what she did “Grandstanding” too.

    I am a huge fan of the recappers and actually defend them when someone criticizes them. Go check out last week’s “Walking Dead” recap where everyone jumped on the recapper and I stood up for them.

    If you think my posts are long you obviously have never been on the “Once Upon a Time” comments. People write books there. And you know what?! I am totally cool with that too. Does not bother me. Because I can skip it if I don’t feel like reading the whole thing. I actually do mostly read them because the posters there are cool and have interesting things to say.

    That is why I like this site. I find the recappers and the commenters funny, interesting and smart. We may not always agree, but that is okay. No one has to get nasty about it.

93. 93
    Madelyne27
    Posted March 15, 2013 at 7:21 am

    Are we all still here? I honestly can’t stop laughing. I hope Dr. Phil does a show on Recapping Bullies. (Raise your hand if you’re sick of the term “bully”? Let’s teach these kids to man-up and learn the way we did back in the good old days of spankings, practical jokes, and mockery.)

94. 94
    Kathleen
    Posted March 15, 2013 at 8:32 am

    AAAHHHHH everyone just take a pill. I agree wholeheartedly with Corinthia. But what I’m more concerned with at this point is…… WHERE IS THE NEW RECAP!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m going through withdrawal here people. This is the site that makes my poopy work week better and if it’s not posted soon I do believe I will end up being the anorexic cutter. Pleeeeeeeease SnoopyK8! Madelyne27! ANYBODY!!!! I NEEEEEEED a new recap! Save me from myself!!!!!!!!!

95. 95
    CrisB83
    Posted March 15, 2013 at 8:43 am

    I’ve been lurking around, following all of this, mostly laughing. However, anyone who uses the word “bully” is just begging for attention, or has too much time on their hands. When I see/hear that word these days my brain shuts off. Let’s go back to the days of I’m rubber and you’re glue…

96. 96
    IrishGirl
    Posted March 15, 2013 at 8:46 am

    I’m still here Madelyne. Shaking my head. This got way off topic of the Dance Moms show. I’m either a bully or a hero on here depending on the poster. I wasn’t even the first one to mention April but she jumped on me (omg…she bullied me!) so I’m just taking it that I’m super special!

97. 97
    chaosbutterfly
    Posted March 15, 2013 at 8:52 am

    Well….the Once Upon a Time books are necessary.
    The show is complicated and mysterious and warrants a dissertation.

    Also, the comment novels tend to stick to the show so it’s easy to read them and care about what is being said, probably because no one can really relate to owing Rumplestiltskin money or can tell the story of that one time when their mom ripped out their fiance’s heart.

    Anyway, I don’t think it’s the length as much as the content that is troubling people. It’s kind of like why people got annoyed with KartoflMuter.
    And I know it’s natural to relate your real life to stuff you see on TV and the news, and I think we all do it to an extent, but I guess it can be grating when it’s every single time or it’s not really relevant or necessary. No offense intended.

98. 98
    Mamabear9296
    Posted March 15, 2013 at 9:20 am

    I really do mean no offense to anyone, but personally I really don’t care about your life or what you used to do or how it used to be. I have my own life and past and none of you care about that or want to hear it. That’s what my real life friends are for. When I read this site, all I want to read about is the show and what everyone thinks about the show, and the show only. Sure, everyone throws in a comment or two HERE AND THERE that pertains to them personally but not in every single comment that you make. That’s what grates on my nerves.

99. 99
    April
    Posted March 15, 2013 at 9:40 am

    I can through and find tons of comments I wrote with zero discussion about me. There is like 6 or 7 shows on here I comment on. Dance Moms just happens to be the only one I really relate to with experience. Well and I guess Walking Dead because I do have a ZA team (but that is all in theory and I am not the only one that discusses zombie plans and theories on there). So you are seeing more into than is there. I certainly have zero experience with monster make up and thus nothing to add to Face Off except show comments.

    None of that matters though because you can just skip right over my comments. Done.

100. 100
     realitytvjunkie
     Posted March 15, 2013 at 12:27 pm

     Amen Kathleen. All these people sound looney at this point. They sound like my kids when one always feels like they have to have the last word. Shut it already, no one cares about your stupid arguing and what cool kid doesn’t like the other.

     Bring on the 2 hour show recap before the next 2 hour show on Tues!

101. 101
     Wednesday
     Posted March 15, 2013 at 12:37 pm

     I’m not sure which is worse, the people bragging about how great and “edgy” their sense of humor is or the people who think they are an authority on comment posting. Get over yourselves, people.

102. 102
     Classy Drunk
     Posted March 15, 2013 at 2:26 pm

     Sheesh…where is the Dance Moms battle cry for 100 comments. Or at least you could have gone with old faithful. I HATE TERESA!

103. 103
     Classy Drunk
     Posted March 15, 2013 at 3:39 pm

     HellZ yeah to Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders or Big Rich Atlanta that’s on right now.

     @April I can see where someone would get that you threw the gay father out there for attention because him being gay really didn’t have much to do with the comment.

     Thanks for the comment war guys…made my Friday afternoon at work enjoyable.

104. 104
     chaosbutterfly
     Posted March 15, 2013 at 9:18 pm

     I think it would be nice to end this thread with a quiet and dignified cock.

105. 105
     Justelle
     Posted March 16, 2013 at 10:08 am

     So there WAS a 2 hour episode? I was quite confused on that front. The only episode I could find was 1 hour. Did they just show 2 one hour episodes and I only saw one?

106. 106
     JudgyWudgy
     Posted March 16, 2013 at 1:44 pm

     @Wednesday, I agree with you 100%. Once upon a time the comments were concise, snarky and focused on the talented recappers and if comments reached 100 it was due to the ridiculousness of the show. Now comment wars are cool and personal stories are everywhere. Oh how I miss the days of just discussing whether or not Heidi Montag is a victim of brainwash or an evil mastermind.

107. 107
     lovebug
     Posted March 16, 2013 at 2:33 pm

     Well I think that was the purpose of this comment war…to get back to just snarky comments and leave your personal life at home.

108. 108
     smarlo
     Posted March 16, 2013 at 4:44 pm

     this past weeks episode was 2 hours….I’ve only gotten through the 1st hour so far though.