Dance Moms Recap: At Last

Recaps

By SnoopK8 | Thursday, September 13, 2012 | 3:43 pm | 49 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Dance Moms, Recaps

But of course, Jabby was only fucking with everyone. She says to Melissa, “all personal issues aside, who will win us the most points?” Oh, so why didn’t you just say that in the first place! In that case, Melissa has to go with Chloe – but she doesn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Way to stand up for your opinions, Melissa. Kendall is crying and angry and she says they already knew who was going to get the part. I can’t blame her for this because there is NO DOUBT in my mind that Jabby was going to give the solo to Chloe the whole time and it’s mean of her to have put the other girls through that.

Shrill yells about how it’s not fair. No, it isn’t, but Jabby hasn’t ever once been fair since day one and Shrill should know that by now. Holly’s like, “OMG, calm down, it’s just a solo, get over it.” See, Holly knows the score. She deems the whole thing ludicrous and calmly leaves the room. See, that’s how you storm out classy.

Kendall interviews that she wanted the solo badly and she beat Justice and Chloe can’t. Oh no you di’n’t! In the dressing room (or wherever), Shrill has pulled herself together for the cameras and says Kendall did her best and Chloe deserves the solo. Kendall angrily says she doesn’t. Heh. I do feel bad for Kendall though.

It’s the day before NATIONALS and Chloe’s rehearsing her solo. She is freaking herself out to the point that she has to go sit down for a minute and pull herself together. Jabby says that Christi gets Chloe all worked up and it’s her fault that Chloe isn’t as confident as she should be. She tells Chloe that she needs to go into that competition and intimidate Justice.

Uh-oh. Here come the Candy Apple’s. They enter the studio and Cathy says it’s a “little under our budget.” Presumably because it doesn’t have a beef jerky store attached. She looks through the observation window into the room that ALDC is practicing in and makes noises at them.

Seriously, what is wrong with her? And she has her boy toy with her: Mitchell the “guest choreographer.” Is he still a guest if he choreographs every dance?

Cathy tells the Apple’s they need to keep their “status.” What status? Ninth place? Cathy says Justice needs to beat Chloe and she leads the Apple’s in chant of “clean Chloe’s clock.” Wow, she really is nuts.

In another studio, there’s a whole bunch of drama I can’t follow over phone calls. Cathy decides to go interrupt Jabby’s rehearsal to get to the bottom of it, or failing that, just be a pain in the ass. She tries to force her way into Jabby’s studio, but Jabby tells her to go away or she’s calling the police.

The judge told you to stay 50 feet away

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SnoopK8
About

Snoop K8 lives in NYC and loves baseball, red wine and Judge Judy (not necessarily in that order).

49 Comments

  1. 1
    Meaghan
    Posted September 13, 2012 at 4:25 pm

    As a former history major, I can firmly assure you that Anne Frank was not crawling on her chin in the attic, nor was she doing flips and/or cartwheels. At least the diary part was accurate.

    And it was only a matter of time before Abby did a “don’t-text-and-drive” number! Ahh, I wonder what next season will give us. A teen pregnancy number? (Don’t suggest that to her.)

    Looks like it really hits the fan in the reunion, hooray! I love dramatic reunion specials (although is it really necessary to have it in two parts, Lifetime?).

    Does this mean DMM comes back in the fall? I kind of miss VicAng.

  2. 2
    Gwen
    Posted September 13, 2012 at 4:31 pm

    Did anyone notice Brooke’s costume? It was different than the one she had on before when she was supposed to do the Anne Frank solo. The one she had on before is actually a trio costume (you can see it on Christi’s Staree if you scroll through the pictures a bit) that she danced in with Maddie and Chloe (not shown on the sho). I’m wondering if when her back was injured she was even going to do a solo or just the trio? Again, this show has the crappiest editing.

  3. 3
    Frizzypop
    Posted September 13, 2012 at 4:49 pm

    “Let Donna Graduate!” hahaha! That’s awesome! I think this is your best recap I’ve read. Very whitty! Good job.

  4. 4
    Dani
    Posted September 13, 2012 at 5:15 pm

    Great Recap!!

    Just for everyone’s info, Dance Moms Miami was canceled, so we won’t have to endure that.. I think Abby’s ultimate dance challenge (I think that’s what it’s called..) will be our “replacement” while we wait for Dance moms season 3.. Personally, I was not a fan of dance moms miami, so am glad it was canceled.

  5. 5
    Jazzy
    Posted September 13, 2012 at 6:32 pm

    Great recap! And omg, was that really Justice’s mom? Total ChaCha look alike! I’m still chortling about that!

    Cathy is absolutely freakin bat-shit cray-cray. Who on earth would bring their kids to her???

  6. 6
    Meaghan
    Posted September 13, 2012 at 6:59 pm

    Oh, and did you notice that MADDIE was the only one to “survive” the text-induced car crash?

    Of course she would be.

  7. 7
    Closet Fan
    Posted September 13, 2012 at 7:50 pm

    Great recap! Not surprised about DMM. I never heard anyone talking about it.

  8. 8
    alicecarroll13
    Posted September 13, 2012 at 8:16 pm

    looks like theres a new cutie patootie in town “no one tell eden wood” makenzie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    the bee suit was super cute..!!!! cant wait for the fights next week….need to get some ben and jerry..hopeing they dont fight with kids in room..good bye dance moms miami…!!

  9. 9
    iwantadventure
    Posted September 13, 2012 at 11:00 pm

    Does anyone know where to see the group dance in full? I lurk around here often but I know how good you commenters are at this so I thought I’d ask and say thanks in advance, hope someone finds it!

    @Meaghan, although I agree that of course Maddie would be the focus, in the case of this group dance I think it actually held significance, Maddie is technically the one to cause the “crash” because she shows the text to Paige. IDK if this is what inspired Abby but there was a disturbing PSA about what happens when you text and drive it is from England, I think, that went viral here because of the goriness. Anyway, in it one of the only “survivors” is the person most guilt ridden, if you decide to look up this PSA I advise to do it with caution. I watched it online with my friends and then a professor showed it in class, it disturbed me for weeks! Anyway, that’s the sense I got from the dance too that Maddie would be the most guilt ridden. Not that it matters the whole thing was super powerful!

  10. 10
    andyourlittledogtoo
    Posted September 13, 2012 at 11:54 pm

    Nationals, not nationals… I just can’t get over the fact that this show is about a fat middleaged woman yelling at little girls that they are never good enough, smart enough, thin enough, flexible enough, graceful enough, etc to breath her hallowed air while said little girls’ mothers are on the sidelines clucking and gossiping and backbiting like thirteen year old girls.

    The entire thing just floors me. And not in a good way. All these girls need to be taken away and sent to boarding school with Mrs. Bartlett a la The Facts of Life where they will be taken of properly by a real adult who has their best interests at heart. Sadly, we do not live in that world. :/

  11. 11
    April
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 5:28 am

    No more DMM? Not sure how I feel about that. I did not like it as much as Dance Moms Pittsburgh, but I did kinda get fond of some of the kids. Mostly Kimmy.

    Great recap! Very witty indeed!

  12. 12
    Chicken Lips
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 7:37 am

    Maybe it is just me, but everytime I see Justice dance, I feel as though he is acting in an off-off-off-off-off-off-Broadway musical about ninjas and that he’s a terrible actor but he got the part because he was the understudy and the original actor got a role in an off-off-off-off-off-Broadway role and just had to take the part, man!

    As you can tell, I apparently have an active imagination at times.

  13. 13
    Karina
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 8:51 am

    You were on target with Kelly needing a battered women’s group. from personal experience, there is only so much you can take when your kid is treated badly and yet they want to stay with their friends and dance. You feel damned if you do, and damned if you don’t.
    Yes, Kelly has her tempermental, irrational moments. Will the other moms really show solidarity and leave also? Not in real life.
    Kelly does need to decide, a parent suffering emotional abuse is a sad situation no matter how pretend parts of this show can be. Thinking that it is the last time that you will see your child dance is a weepy thought!
    Anyhow, love reading your recaps.

  14. 14
    April
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 10:25 am

    I will also miss VictAng throw their little gay hissy fits and shade throwing. They were super cute gay men.

  15. 15
    TurtleGirl93 TurtleGirl93
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 12:20 pm

    I have a “Donna Martin Graduates” t-shirt–it was ironically retro-trendy(or something like that) a few years ago. LOL
    Now back to the recap!

  16. 16
    Gwen
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 5:45 pm

    Can someone briefly explain the “Let Donna graduate!” thing? I think the reference is a little before my time. :P I still laughed though.

  17. 17
    Moli Moli
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 6:29 pm

    @ Chicken Lips, I feel the same way about Justice. The thing is with Justice, it appears that he does have ‘something’ and I honestly believe that with the right training he could be something. Chloe for the first time in weeks made me stop breathing while watching her dance, the girl is beautiful on stage. Maddie and Mack did GREAT as well, I agree you could tell Mack loved every single thing about her routine and costume. I have to say after I watched the group dance…I sat with my mouth open for a few moments then started clapping IRL. OMG, Brook showed emotion during both dances and I.LOVED.IT! I will say that while watching her awesome performances was she giving it to us because this was her last hurrah.
    Good gravy, Paige is absolutely gorgeous. She is by far the prettiest of our girls(I think ALL of our girls are gorgeous), she doesn’t need all the makeup they put on her. Brooke looked like a teenager for the first time to me since the show has been on, she is a pretty young lady and I hope that she never ever records a song with all that auto-tune again.
    I must say Holly was good with SOLOGATE, she knew Nia wasn’t getting a solo(and I’m 99.9% sure she knew Chloe would get it) and wasn’t bent out of shape over the outcome. I honestly believe Jabby thought Chloe was going to place higher than Kendall and by Kendall placing higher(with the producers help/egging) she had to do ‘something’ to get Chloe in the spot. We all know I adore Chloe, but you have to admit the safer pony to bet on would be her.
    Kendall’s words pissed me off, but think about it Jabby told her/them last week(days ago) that the placement for solos for NATIONALS would be based on their performances from the last show. She placed higher than Chloe therefore in her mind(as well as ANYONE else) she deserved a solo..
    I tell ya, Jabby/or Gabrielle(can’t remember her name) is the bomb(yes I know I’m dating myself) with those crazy routines!!

  18. 18
    Frizzypop
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 6:38 pm

    @Gwen- the reference of “let Donna graduate” is from Beverly Hills 90210. The character of Donna Martin who was played by Tori Spelling was not going to be able to go through graduation and the kids at school rallied around her to get the administration to let her graduate.

  19. 19
    Moli Moli
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 6:48 pm

    @Frizzypop, I didn’t watch 90120 back in the day. But thank you for letting us/me know where the reference came from :) .

  20. 20
    Frizzypop
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 6:56 pm

    No problem! I was in high school the same year that they were so it was a must watch with my group of friends! Lol.

  21. 21
    Moli Moli
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 7:05 pm

    lol@Frizztpop, it looks like most of the gasmii are around the same age. I was in high school when it was on and had soooo many activities I missed out on all television shows between ’90 and ’94. Man, I miss those days all I had to worry about was if my hair was together and I had the latest and greatest(parent bought) outfit that of course matching in some form or fashion with my best friend(and most times group). Sigh, I miss those days…

  22. 22
    April
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 7:23 pm

    I watched 90210 but I was too young for it really. I was in like elementary school and yet it was my favorite show. My parents always let me watch stuff that was inappropriate for me. “Porkys” was my favorite movie when I was like 8. Yeppers. The movie took on a whole new meaning to me once I watched it as an adult.

  23. 23
    April
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 7:24 pm

    ps has anyone found the full dances online yet?

  24. 24
    Wednesday
    Posted September 14, 2012 at 10:03 pm

    Nice recap. I thought it was interesting to see the different reactions from the moms in this episode where Chloe was given the solo versus the episode where Maddie got the part on Drop Dead Diva. Both times they thought the tryout was a sham, but they only made a big stink about it when it involved Maddie. Actually, I guess that isn’t very interesting or surprising.

  25. 25
    TurtleGirl93 TurtleGirl93
    Posted September 15, 2012 at 8:37 am

    @FrizzyPop #20, I graduated in ’93 too, along with the 90210 gang and the Saved by the Bell class. I think their graduations were better than mine.

    Has anyone seen the Dance Moms breast cancer commercial? I just saw it and I’m a little teary-eyed.

  26. 26
    Gwen
    Posted September 15, 2012 at 4:37 pm

    Thank you for filling me in! I think I’m about ten years younger than almost everybody here, lol.

  27. 27
    Gwen
    Posted September 15, 2012 at 4:39 pm

    Also @April no, not yet (and you know I’m the Queen of Full Dances!) Hopefully Christi will post one or two on her Staree.

  28. 28
    DM
    Posted September 16, 2012 at 12:51 am

    Justice’s mom has been tweeting all week saying that he is no longer an apple. She does say that he is still dancing but has not said where. This probably means that he is at ALDC but they’re under contract so she can’t say anything about it.

  29. 29
    Bec
    Posted September 16, 2012 at 5:40 am

    I must be closer to 20 years younger :S

  30. 30
    Wednesday
    Posted September 16, 2012 at 6:40 pm

    I haven’t seen full dances from this week, but someone recently posted some of the dances from last week performed at a different location. Sorry I don’t know how to embed them.

    Maddie – Piece of My Heart
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nyTdQGjxmhA

    Mackenzie – Daisy Chain
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVURilkNAxM

    Kendall – Kiss Kiss

  31. 31
    Wednesday
    Posted September 16, 2012 at 6:44 pm

    And for people tired of the same type of dances they have a group tap number with Maddie and Payton too.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PpsSxc8Ba2A

  32. 32
    tntjunky
    Posted September 16, 2012 at 8:03 pm

    Cha-cha!!!!! I knew she reminded me of someone! Loved all the dances, so happy for Chloe.
    Did anyone else think Cathy looked fab in her talking heads? 1O years younger, I thougt

  33. 33
    April
    Posted September 17, 2012 at 5:14 am

    Was that a competition or just like a performance? Maddie is a great tapper because she was dancing with the older girls. Tap was always my best and favorite so I think I have a soft spot for Maddie now because that was like me. I love a guy who can tap, so go Brandon!

  34. 34
    April
    Posted September 17, 2012 at 5:19 am

    It was interesting to hear Jill talk about how they have multiple choreographers besides Abby.

  35. 35
    Lilly19
    Posted September 17, 2012 at 5:37 am

    if justice becomes an aldc dancer.. i dont even know what to say .. i like the kid and all, but if thAt happens (which i do not know) its going to be so obvious lifetime staged it . i mean who would really drive their kid out of state every week to a dance studio ..

  36. 36
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted September 17, 2012 at 5:40 am

    Any time a 90210 reference in used in a recap it’s a win for us all.

  37. 37
    Lilly19
    Posted September 17, 2012 at 6:34 am

    and i think mackenzie is a mini version of brooke. I would love to see some of brookes dances from when she was that age. I’m excited to see if we will get to watch mackenzie get older and do dances like brooke, once she outgrows the cute-zy stage !

  38. 38
    April
    Posted September 17, 2012 at 7:34 am

    Agree about Justice. I am guessing that is what will happen. I think they were already setting that up with the finale. I actually like Justice (besides his dumb name). They are more likely to win with a boy in their group because judges love the boys and he could use some technique lessons from Abby to make him a better dancer. Also give him some better choreography.

  39. 39
    Wednesday
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 2:26 pm

    @April, I think they were just performing for some event called Celebrate Monroeville. There doesn’t appear to be any judges.

  40. 40
    Sharon
    Posted September 18, 2012 at 5:57 pm

    How have I missed out on this pile of madness for so long???????????????????????
    Why didn’t someone tell me?
    Blood and guts on a dance stage???????????????
    Who’da thunk????????

  41. 41
    Nolongerbre
    Posted September 19, 2012 at 11:16 am

    Just watched the reunion and let me tell ya, the folks over at Lifetime are reading the Gasm! A few things got cleared up and I swear they came directly from the comments on this thread (we of course have known all of this info for months due to our amazing sleuthing). The executive producer for the show is the host and made a comment about how Jill has a 1900 voice. Kinda pissed they decided to make it a two parter but it’ll be worth it to see the return of Kaya. Also noticed that Christi gave us a shout out on twitter! Yay Christi keep reading our recaps we love ya and your crazy one liners girl!

  42. 42
    Nolongerbre
    Posted September 19, 2012 at 11:17 am

    Forgot to mention that it was a let down not getting to see the whole fight. While Lifetime did give us “never before seen footage” any choking was edited out :(

  43. 43
    Gwen
    Posted September 19, 2012 at 12:08 pm

    Maybe, because the police were called, they can’t show it on TV? Just a guess.

  44. 44
    Gwen
    Posted September 19, 2012 at 12:09 pm

    Oh, and did anyone catch Cathy saying “We didn’t know it was your dressing room”? How about the ALDC sign on the door, Cathy?

  45. 45
    SaraKate
    Posted September 19, 2012 at 12:47 pm

    @Gwen – but if the police were called, they would have been able to show the rest, because technically, Cathy committed assault when she threw water on Christi – first.

    I LOVED that Jill called Melissa out on the getting engaged while Greg was still married! If you’re going to let the kids email pictures of rings, etc., hello? It’s gonna get out, and your friends are going to ask about it. And when you tell them NOT to talk about it, they’re STILL going to talk about it!

  46. 46
    SaraKate
    Posted September 19, 2012 at 1:00 pm

    Oh, and because I’m just that nosy, Greg’s divorce was finally granted on July 30, 2012.

    There’s no record of a marriage license being requested at this point. :-)

  47. 47
    Gwen
    Posted September 19, 2012 at 4:30 pm

    @SaraKate right, right… Well, maybe they thought if they showed Christi choking Cathy, the parents who let their kids watch this show would finally turn it off? Lol, probably not. But I’m guessing they didn’t show it because if it really was so “traumatic” to the kids there then they wouldn’t want to scare off viewers.

  48. 48
    HipPopCoach
    Posted September 23, 2012 at 12:33 am

    OMG you all crack me up! Tho I have been very sick this year, whenever I read these recaps & your comments, it makes me laugh for days! Thanks for the entertainment!

  49. 49
    Aunty Kim
    Posted October 18, 2012 at 6:07 pm

    What happened between Christi and Cathy? Our episodes are behind, we’ve just seen Paige break her leg. Please share!

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