In the Candy Apple’s corner, Shrill rehearses Kendall in the stairwell. Shrill bitches that she’s paying Cathy all this money, but SHE still has run the number with Kendall. Cry me a river, beyotch.
Chloe’s solo is up first and she is quite the vision in feathers.
At one point, she loses an earring on stage and Christi is afraid that she will land on it with her knee when she has to drop down at the end. It’s touch and go for a minute there, but she finishes up safely with no earring-induced injuries.
Time for Paige’s solo.
What was that about Jabby not noticing? She says that Paige is doing a completely different number and notes that it looks like something from an elementary school talent show. That turns on a light bulb in Jabby’s head and she “realizes” that Kelly must have choreographed it. Jabby says that Kelly “just cost her kid a crown.” Then she says that Kelly is successful at a real bar, not a ballet barre. Ho ho, good one, Jab.
She says that Kelly should stick to what she does best and pantomimes taking a drink.
I know the feeling
Hey, there’s nothing wrong with a little tipple now and then. I’m a lush just from watching this show. Can’t imagine how I’d be if I actually lived it.
Kendall’s solo is up next and… we have another CD skipping incident! Call the FBI. Kendall keeps going with no problems though.
Well, Cathy says she “flatlined” and was “mundane.” But other than that, she did great. Jabby interviews that this is not the Kendall that SHE trained. She says this Kendall is a “hot mess” and that Cathy has ruined her. She says Kendall is wasting all this time traveling to Ohio when she could be at ALDC becoming a stahhh.
Backstage, Cathy tells Shrill that a skipping CD is not a big deal, but Shrill says it’s a REALLY big deal to the 9-year-old whose CD skipped. Shrill says that if Cathy had taken more time with Kendall, this wouldn’t have happened. Shrill “cries” in the hallway about her horrible lot in life to one of the guest choreographers who is obviously thinking he doesn’t get paid enough for this shit.
Hey baby, I can make you feel better
Shrill interviews that she’s “starting to think” that Cathy only took Kendall in to get back at Jabby.
Give this woman an Emmy
For Cathy’s part, she says Shrill thinks her kid is better than everyone. She interviews that Shrill is a studio hopper and NOT a True Apple. Oh my. I would love to know what makes a True Apple. Too much makeup, bad choreography and a moribund will to live?
In the ALDC green room, Paige is upset about what Jabby is going to say to her. Kelly interviews that it’s hard as a mom to see her daughter so upset and that she knows Jabby is going to be mad. Too bad there’s nothing Kelly could have done to avoid this situation. She tries to rationalize it to Paige by saying that Jabby told her at pyramid to work on the number herself. I’m sure that Jabby will understand. Holly predicts that the feces is about to hit the fan.
Jabby stalks in and asks what happened. She says when you’re up for a title, you need to have a flawless routine. Kelly says maybe when Jabby works more with Paige “we” will do the dance as intended. Jabby’s like, “what’s this ‘we’ shit?” She says it’s not about Kelly, it’s about Paige. Kelly says Paige wanted to push herself. Jabby asks Paige what she thinks is wrong with the dance, beside her mom’s opinion, that is. Paige says she wanted more of a challenge.
Jabby and Kelly scream back and forth about choreography and how it’s Jabby’s name on the line, etc., etc. Then she says Kelly shouldn’t raise her kid to be a sneak, which is a very good point. Meanwhile, Paige is crying for real, which sucks if this whole thing was set up for the show.
Mommy does it because she loves you