Error: Twitter did not respond. Please wait a few minutes and refresh this page.
Anyway, Jabby says of course she’s not jealous, she just hates Kelly because Kelly doesn’t push her kids hard enough and is ruining their lives like she ruined her own. Kelly maintains that Jabby burned out Brooke and Kelly wants Brooke to try other things and also Jabby never encourages Paige. Jabby says it’s because Paige doesn’t WANT to win and then she says maybe Kelly doesn’t remember because Kelly was out getting drunk.
Jeff asks Kelly what was up with her nervous breakdown at NATIONALS and Kelly says she hates Jabby, but she loves her because she’s been such a big part of her life and she wants to leave but she doesn’t. Ugh. Kelly can haz therapeh?
Just when we might be getting some insight into Kelly’s psyche (just kidding), Jeff goes to Christi and asks about the “tension” between her and Melissa. This is accompanied by a montage of Christi yelling at Melissa and Melissa storming out. Christi says that Melissa does terrible things but it would be fine if she would just admit it. Christi illustrates with a story about one time when Mackenzie broke Nia’s prop cane and Melissa would not admit that her kid did it.
Christi says that whenever Maddie doesn’t win, Melissa always has an excuse. Melissa disagrees. Then they all discuss whether Maddie or Chloe is better, but conclude that both girls are equally good (although you know Melissa secretly thinks Maddie is better). Jabby says their “rivalry” is good because it makes both Maddie and Chloe better.
Again, Jeff cuts off the conversation to bring in Kaya aka Black Patsy. We see some, I think, new footage where she is yelling about being pregnant at 16 and being a lesbian. Oh god, don’t give MTV any ideas.
Jeff asks if he can call her Black Patsy, and she says he can call her Kaya. Heh. She explains that her mom dubbed her “Black Patsy” because she is a crazy stage mom like Patsy Ramsey. Jeff wants to know why Kaya brought her daughter to ALDC in the first place. Kaya says because of ALDC’s reputation and she never wanted anything to do with the crazy moms. (Which is obviously why she went on a show called “Dance Moms.”)
Jeff notes that the moms look uncomfortable. There is a bunch of back and forth about who was mean to whom first. Apparently, Kaya threatened to “F up” Christi, but the moms allegedly called Kaya the d-word (I think they mean “debutante”) several times. Christi says she doesn’t care if Kaya is a lesbian because she has LOTS of gay friends. Kaya says, bullshit, “everyone” says they have a lot of gay friends and a lot of black friends. Shrill says that Melissa doesn’t really think that Kaya is a lesbian. Melissa’s sitting there like “don’t look at me, scary black lesbian.”
Kaya’s says of course she is really a lesbian, she even has her partner’s name tattooed on her back. But then she says she’s not really black and everybody laughs. The levity is short-lived because they still need to discuss the “F up” threat. Melissa says she thought they were all going to have to get into a rumble. Oh my god, a dance moms rumble would be the most annoying thing ever. They’d all be tripping on their 7-inch platforms and cocktail dresses. Kelly would have a cosmo in her hand the whole time. Kaya could take them all at once, I bet.